The Dating Chronicles of Tyler

The Swingers Club

2010-07-12T15:53:00.000-07:00

This is probably the craziest night I have ever had. This post has a lot of sexual content and makes me feel a little awkward to even tell you about....

Early last week this girl had mentioned to me something about a swingers bar. I remember hearing about it once when I was out in Vegas, but I didn't really know if they existed the way I imagined, or seen in porno's. I Googled swinger bars in MA. A few clicks later I found an email address on a site saying if you were interested in going you'd have to get on the reservation list. I said fuck it and just emailed this person. We emailed back and fourth a bit and eventually they said Alexis and I were on the list to get into the club. This was on Wed and the bar was open Friday from 8-2. I emailed Alexis and she said she would be down to go...if nothing else to just check it out.

Friday comes and we decide we are going to go. She said she was a bit nervous, so we pre-gamed at a friend of mine's house. We had a few quick drinks and headed out at around 11.

When we walked in it seemed like a normal bar. I don't even remember them checking our names. It was 20 bucks each to get in. I peeked in and there were people on the dance floor, band playing music and aside from the one guy walking around with no shirt on it didn't seem too much different than a normal bar. As we enter and actually walk past the dance floor I noticed a girl giving a guy head right in the middle. I suppose this was the first real indication that I was at a swingers bar.

In the back left corner was were the freaky shit happens. Along the wall there was a window that looked over a floor that had 8-10 mattresses just laying on the ground with fancy pillows all over the place. This part of the bar seemed pretty empty at this point.

We walk over to the bar and got another stiff drink to loosen up. Walking around I noticed the crowd was a bit older than we are. That's what I expected. The guys were probably in their late 30's or early 40's and the women ranged from mid 20's to 40;s. Some of the people were not attractive what so ever and they seemed to group together. The second indication that this was a swingers bar was how all of the women were eye fucking me like I've never seen. At a normal bar I'm about average as far as looks go in comparison to other guys. This bar I was much younger and probably one of the better looking guys.

The first couple we met were these Italian people. The guy was a Rode Island version of Al Pachino in Scarface. His gf was this tiny girl with an Italian accent. She was wearing a very revealing silver dress. The girls start talking and feeling each other up. I just talked to Al about the whole scene. As I'm talking to him, this cougar with huge fake tits keeps staring at me. This went on for 30 seconds and I felt obligated to at least go say hi. I excused myself and told Alexis I was going out to the dance floor. She didn't mind and I wasn't going too far.

I walked over and said hi, grabed her hand and lead her out to the dance floor. I told her that's where I like to talk. She started rubbing her ass on me and I'm pretty much ready to fuck her against the wall. She grabed my dick and I put my hand up her skirt. Of course she wasn't wearing underwear, so I started playing with her pussy. Her boyfriend was sitting down against the bar on the edge of the dance floor. He didn't seem to mind. She pulled out her tits and they were awesome. Alexis made her way over and the both of them start sucking on each other's tits. I saw this taller blond girl adjacent to me. She was dancing with someone but she was also staring at me. I made a little dance move toward her way and she came up behind me. Again, she just grabed my dick. She was also not wearing underwear. This is un.fucking.real.

I reconvene with Alexis, who is having as much fun as I am. I told her I want to fuck some girls. She said she does too but she wants another drink. She also pointed out the fact that the guys that those other two girls were with were not attractive. Even though I am ready to fuck every girl in the bar at the same time, I did want to make sure Alexis was alright with shit. This place is aggressive and I didn't want her getting stuck in a dangerous position.

Another drink or two later we notice that there are people on those mattresses and people are just watching them from the windows. Alexis sees this thin girl with glasses walking into the back room. She wanted to go talk to her so we also walk to the back room. Where the mattresses are, there is also an area where people just hang out. Here is a layout of the place:

So we follow glasses girl into the area where people were hanging out. Alexis ran up to her and I didn't catch the conversation but they just started making out. I meet her date, who reminded me of an 80's porn star. They were one of the only other couples our age....late 20's probably. So the two girls seemed to like each. I started talking to 80's and he's pretty casual about the whole situation. He's asks,

"do you care if I fuck your girl?"
"No, do you care if I fuck yours?"
"Nope....should we get one of these private rooms and fuck them?"
"yea sure"

So were hanging out, I guess waiting for one of these rooms. Alexis starts grabbing my dick, and I'm surprisingly comfortable here. I thought I'd be a little more nervous. All of a sudden she pulls out my dick and starts giving me head right there. She is pretty aggressive and pretty damn good at it. Then glasses girl kneels down and they start trading off. Somehow it drew a crowd and I had a circle of people watching this shit....it was fucking crazy. People were literally yelling stuff out. As I'm having this done, I am looking at this cougar in a pink shirt. 80's was watching for a bit, and then he pulls his shit out and glasses goes over to him. I look at the girl in the pink shirt and wave her over. She cuts through the crowd and jumps in. Apparently it was going to be a long time before we got one of these private rooms, so we just move this party over to these mattresses.

Me and 80's end up fucking the shit out of these three girls and the whole bar came over to watch us. People were packed behind the window and in the hang out area behind us. I felt like it was similar to when I used to box. There would be 4 or 5 lame fights and it would get boring, and then I would come out and my match would be like a street fight on steroids and everyone would go crazy. Actually this is nothing like boxing, I'm sorry for that analogy.

I finished on them around 1:30. I found my clothes in the corner and got dressed. I closed out my tab and we left the bar. When we were outside a guy pulled up and offered Alexis 4 grand if he could take her to a hotel. He was showing me fist fulls of 100 dollar bills. She declined and we left. I fucked her one more time when we got back.

So now I know what a swingers club is like. It is identical to what you see in porno's but with older people. The biggest thing I was worried about was the ability to perform in front of people. That is a lot of pressure...but I guess it didn't bother me that much.

New Site Coming

2010-07-06T18:34:00.000-07:00

I have been thinking about this for quite sometime now. I started my blog back in February of 2009 and I've been averaging about a post a week. I remember, I was first motivated to start blogging about my dates after I read Roosh's Sour DSL's. It was a long series but I thought well worth the read. I liked writing about dates with, sometimes, excruciating detail. When I would write about my nights out, I would narrate it how I imagine Bret Easton Ellis wrote American Psycho. I would take note of things while on dates and write about each little interaction. Those were some of my favorite posts.

I also started writing more general posts about game in the broad sense. The types of pick up I do and what works for me. I would say there is some pretty valuable material buried within the sea of posts and stories. I divert from the subject of women at times if there is something I am focusing on personally, like fitness, money, life in general. Women alone can get boring...

I recently bought a new domain name. I think it's time to leave the realm of "blogsppot.com" and move to my own place. The domain name is pretty kick ass... I want to organize my site more and do more with it. I get a lot of emails and sometimes I spend more time replying to each individual question than I do on my blog. Once I have my own site I want to post at least 3-4 times a week. I'll have it separated into a more organized fashion. I'd like to reply to issues I get through the email, and post them to the blog. This way a lot of people can benefit from other people's specific issues. I'd also like to add some more legitimate photos, videos and links. The ideas are flowing...

I want to get the site up and running by this weekend. Once I tweak it a bit I will link it here and do all of my updating from that site.

If anyone has any suggestions then by all means shoot me an email.

I don't envy the rich

2010-07-06T08:18:00.000-07:00

Over the past weekend I've learned even more that money you don't earn yourself, can ruin your value system. This isn't breaking news, but I got to see it to a disgusting extent over the 4th.

I went to Maine with a girl I'm dating and hung out with her family. They have houses in Portland, Boothbay and Wiscasset. Initially it sounded like it could be a relaxing weekend. Their Boothbay house is right on the water, and they have a few different boats on the dock to play around with. All I wanted to do was lay around, drink a few beers and unwind. I didn't realize I was going to be surrounded by a bunch of whining little bitches.

Saturday I was hanging with one of her cousins who is 21 and works at a bike shop full time. He is a cool guy to talk to but I've never seen him lift a finger for anyone. We ran one errand in prep for his family party and he bitched and moaned till no end about it. We had to pick up beer for the party, that's it. The caterers were taking care of the rest. We took his Porshe, and he drove like a mad man because he was mad about having to get off the couch.

Everyone seemed to be irritated that there was a family party in the first place. It inconvenienced them. They didn't even want to be bothered with seeing their own family.

Four of the girls promised a friend of theirs that they would join in a parade on Sunday morning to raise money for some cause. They were getting dressed up and passing out jello shots on a float on the 4th of July. That doesn't sound too bad... Sunday morning came and they didn't feel like going. They had no other obligation, but they all decided to bail out on their committment to show up.

It didn't matter to me if I went or not, but I could imagine how mad the girl who was expecting them could have been. She called and was furious since these girls made up half of her float. I asked them if they felt bad about not following through, since they had promised they would go. They had zero remorse, and even felt a bit of resentment towards this girl asking them to commit to such a thing. In their head, they actually got mad at this girl to avoid feeling any guilt. Their sense of entitlement is uncanny.

By the time we made our way to Boothbay Harbor, I was getting more than irritated with everyone's attitudes. One person I did admire was this girl's grandfather. He introduced me to Ella Fitzgerald, who he proclaimed to be the best jazz player of all time. My favorite quote of the weekend came from him. His uptight daughter was complaining to him demanding he adjusts the lights in the room. She wanted them dimmer, then lighter, then a bit dimmer. He looked at her, and with his mild manner and meticulous wording said, "I will listen to orders, but I don't take them..." and turned the lights up to the max and slowly walked away.

There were about 6 of us that hung out a majority of the weekend. They were all relatives to the girl I came with. They wanted to spend Sunday smoking weed and hanging out in their music studio. I get anxious if I can't do what I want, and I am not an avid drug user. Hanging out in some closed off room getting high is not what I wanted to do on my 3 day weekend. I ended up excusing myself and going down to the dock. I wanted to take advantage of being on the water and the nice weather. I assembled this little boat they had and took it sailing. I've never sailed before but I figured it out. It's all logic and the set up was simple mechanics. Her cousins thought I was so funny and nice, but I think I lost my fan base when I opted to not hang out anymore.

Eventually the girl I came with walked down to the waterfront and I pulled up to the dock. I took the sail down, pulled up the floor board and the rudder and took out the oars. I wanted to row around the bay so I threw on the oarlocks. Every time I am in a row boat I think about when Arnold Swartzenager rowed to America from Austria to meet his twin brother Danny DeVito in the move Twins. She kept apologizing for the weekend but she didn't realize I wasn't really mad at anyone. I was just bored. I was happy on the water doing my own thing. Some people don't realize that you can be happy doing things on your own. I think everyone else was uncomfortable that I wasn't participating in getting high and wasting away the day....I wasn't doing what everyone else was doing and that made them uneasy.

The main thing that got on my nerves was that sense of entitlement these kids had. Instead of asking for things, they demanded them. When asked to do things, they bitch and get out of it. They expect to get their way, and their parents try their hardest to make life as easy for them as possible. They are crippling them for life. They all take pills for depression, and then pills for being manic, and get high day in and day out to deal with life. This post was negative in nature, but it was just sickening to see how people's value system could be so fucked up just because of the ample opportunity they have handed to them.

Double Date

2010-07-01T13:56:00.001-07:00

Last Thursday I met a girl out at a bar, Jessica. We had plans to hang out Tuesday but I got strep throat over the weekend. She didn't know this yet, but I had plans on healing myself by Tuesday afternoon.

Jessica text'd me on Monday and asked if I would be up for a double date on Wednesday instead. Her friend had exchanged numbers with my friend. Normally I am not a fan of double dates, but for the sake of nervous girls I went along with it. They wanted to meet up at Dave and Busters, a video game type bar. I suggested that they come to my friend's house for a drink and then we'll figure out where we are going.

I knew from our last interaction that I had Jessica in the palm of my hand. My friend was dating a girl name Maria. I was partially more interested in how their date would go, and also more hopeful. Maria was a tall, athletic, smart and cocky girl. Her confidence was annoying and questionable.

I got to my friend's house around 7 and got ready for the night. I wasn't nervous because I don't get that nervous anymore. I could tell my friend was analyzing things but we were both excited for a good night out. I invited the girls to his house first because I think his place reflects a lot about him that girls don't get to see on initial meeting. I also wanted to take one car out so that the girls would have to come back to his house at the end of the night.

They showed up around 8:15 and came in through the back. My strep throat has settled down but my voice was still a bit shaky. The doctor said I was no longer contagious but I guess we'll find out in another few days. I probably should have been in bed. The girls looked good! I didn't talk much when they first arrived because I had the urge to cough if the sentence was longer than 4 words. We stood in the kitchen and had a drink. Then we made our way into the living room. My friend was on point at this part of the night. I could see his confidence radiating, negging Melissa just enough. Negging is a fine line I tend to shy away from more than toward.

Earlier he mentioned about how he had been texting Maria back and fourth, playful banter stuff. Essentially talking shit to each other but in a playful way. I have a little different approach to this. I don't like texting and I hate any excess in playful banter. This is one of the first things I noticed when we were sitting in the living room. They were talking and it was a semi competition of who could be the wittiest. They were talking about work, financial oriented jobs and my friend had the upper hand. He had more experience.

After some of the joking Maria was in competition mode, and I think it was foreshadowed by the texting that was going on before hand. It preemptively got her riled up before she even got to the house. I went into the kitchen to get another glass a wine and to sneak a shot of dayquil cough medicine. Jess came out and we hung out in the kitchen for a few until the other two joined us. I said I didn't want to go to Dave and Busters and would prefer a bar. We went out to a nice area of town to grab a drink.

We got to this restaurant and sat outside. It was nice and things were going pretty well at this point. Jess and I were arm in arm and my friend and Maria seemed to be getting along fine. We sat down and ordered some sangria and pizza. I didn't pay that much attention to my friend's conversation but I felt like at dinner things started to go south. Judging by the body language, legs crossed outward rather than inward, body slightly turned, lack of direct eye contact during conversation. Things can go south, but that doesn't always mean you've lost them. There are ways to redeem or re energize the moment. I've had to do it plenty of times. Sometimes conversations go stale and you need something fun and random. If possible you want to avoid letting things start to slide down that slippery slope from the start. This would have been some of my suggestions:

A. Text her less. Do your best to not blatantly expose that you are the pursuer. Leave her guessing, at least for a little bit.

B. Cut the playful banter down to a minimum. When girls do this shit, I play along at first but I try not to let it become a competitive relationship. I try to build more of a companionship. I typically ignore the shit tests and competitive remarks to let them know right off the bat that I don't care for that kind of talk. Girls really do respond to reward and punishments.

C. I could tell he was a bit anxious. He made a few jokes while at the house, and then before they could even laugh or digest the joke he said "just kidding." Just relaxing, talking slower, moving slower will make things seem more natural. You see the same things happen in public speaking.

D. The girl was tall. It was her insecurity, but I think he turned it into his. He likes tall girls but he was uncomfortable with the fact that she thought she was too tall. At one point he tried to explain to her how he liked taller women to ease her discomfort. "Models are tall." I say stick it to her. Let her be insecure about it, and you go about your merry way confident as hell.

E. Take up more space. I always own two chairs. One I sit in, one my arm is over. Being too invested in the conversation is just subtly needy. Being spread out and occasionally distracted is more interesting.

F. Just be less responsive and less analytical. This partially relates to that banter. You don't have to answer every question or pay attention to every detail. If things aren't going great, then just relax and confidently ask her some bold questions. Spice up the conversation. Make some sort of a change in the environment.

After Jess and I finished our Sangria, I wanted to sit inside at the bar for a drink. She turned 23 at midnight so we discussed what we were going to do. I didn't want to get too drunk and I didn't want her getting too drunk. She ordered us a round of light beers and we chatted. She was turned towards me with her legs open and my hand squeezing her thighs. I was turned on like a raging bull and she loved it. After 20 minutes we went back outside to rejoin our friends. I wanted to give my friend some time, and also spend some time with Jess.

This is when the biggest move of disinterest took place. Maria was texting her friend, and then got up and left the bar all together. She walked over to the bar next door with some other guy and hung out there for 20-30 minutes. I felt a little bad, felt a little angry that this girl was being such an outright bitch to my friend. A part of me wanted to leave her there. If my friend gave me the word, I would have left, but he let Jess find her.

We all drove back to my friend's house around 12:30 or so. It was a bit awkward for them. He pointed out the fact that it was rude to leave. They continued this discussion once we got back to the house. They talked it out and then they were play fighting in the living room. If you ask me, this girl is a flouzie.

I made plans with Jess to sleep at her house. My bag was upstairs with my clothes so I asked if she would come up and help me get my stuff. When we got upstairs I picked her up, brought her into my friend's room and threw her on the bed. She asked if she thought my friend would mind if I gave her her birthday gift in his room. He didn't mind.

While my friend was talking to Maria, I made sex with Jess. Those thighs were so young, firm and thick. She let me do whatever I wanted. Without getting into too much detail, she knew how to finish things off right. We went back downstairs and it turned out my friend and Maria had been making out before Maria left.

Maria has successfully confused this shit out of my good friend. This goes to show that even when you think you're down and out, there is always a chance for revival. That is why we have the women drive to us before we go out.

In conclusion to this story, I think if he put up with less of her bull shit (shit tests, competitive remarks), had a more stimulating conversation and just portrayed more confidence he could have tamed this wandering girl. At one point he had her, lost her, and somewhat gained her back....but let's remember that she is a flouzie. It's all part of that social calibration. The more time you spend with women, the more situations you encounter, the better you get at handling them. Some dates just aren't meant to work out. All we can do is try our best to get in their pants before they realize it.

I've fixed my insecurities, Now what?

2010-06-30T09:37:00.000-07:00

A few years ago I spend a good 5 or 6 months living in D.C. There were college kids from all across the country involved in the program that brought me to D.C. for this semester. I lived in the Arlington Courthouse Apartments. I was lucky enough to get the top floor with ceiling to floor windows looking over the city. I was a little older than most of the other students, a little wiser and a little more experienced. This apartment building was leased out to a number of interns and students so I got myself into quite a lot of trouble with the ladies. My roommates would laugh and say that when my door was shut, they never knew which girl would be walking out when it opened.

While I was down there I met a guy who was also into game. He knows more about game theory than I probably ever will. I have read what I thought to be the essentials and ran with it. He has read probably 10 times the books and articles. We were catching up last night, talking about how things are going. While we were talking he made an interesting statement.

"When I was in D.C. I always felt nervous about approaching women because I felt I was too skinny. My physique wasn't up to par to open women without AA. So I recently quit drinking, started eating right, got a personal trainer and put on 40 pounds of muscle. Now my physique is much better, but it has done nothing for my approach anxiety or my success towards women."

There was a guy who I was in the Air Force with that was 100 times better looking than me who was petrified of talking to women. Women would be pointing, staring, smiling at him and he would almost hide from them. It was frustrating to watch.

I admire my friend who hit the gym hard core as a remedy to his pick-up. He asked, "why do I still have the same amount of approach anxiety as I did before I hit up the gym?" My answer was that you were working on a completely separate issue. He had an insecurity about his weight, and he fixed that. Now he is more physically fit, but that doesn't mean he is any better with women. If he wants to get better with women, he needs to do some exercises in that field. Approaching and experimenting.

"If I no longer have this insecurity, how do I then get over this approach anxiety?" The reasoning makes sense. If I am afraid to talk to women because or reasons x,y and z, then if I remove those insecurities I should be able to approach women. When it comes down to it, the issue here is your comfort level with women, not how much you can bench or how much you weigh.

This is what separates the men from the boys. You have to sack up and talk to women. I know he understands the fundamentals, but now he needs to put them to work. Get a few good openers down. Practice them to see which works best and which stimulates the best response. Have some material ready, and bring up subjects that will allow you to talk about yourself and the stories you have. As a male, as the approacher, it is our responsibility to make the conversation work. If we bail out because the girls aren't adding much to the conversation, then we are bailing too early. I need a better indicator of disinterest than a quiet girl.

This is a run down of how I feel about insecurities and building comfort around women.

1. The best way to become more comfortable with women is to attack the problem directly and spend more time with them. Approach them, go on as many dates as you can, talk to them even if it's for the soul purpose of conversation.

2. If you have insecurities, take care of them. Look into solutions. That is why I admire what my friend did. He took charge and made a significant change. Being fit might not help you directly with women, but it will definitely help you indirectly. It has a positive effect on your self-confidence and that will reflect more once you start talking to women.

3. Experiences. When I talk to a woman, I don't ever feel like I have to dig for stuff to talk about. I have a lot of experience in a lot of different areas, so I am excited to share my stories with her. I never feel uncomfortable going on a date, that there might be too much awkward silence or nothing to talk about. I could tell stories about myself all day long. That's what you need to develop to remove that fear of success. That fear of "what if my opener does work? Then what do I do?...what if we do go on a date? then what?" People have a legitimate fear of success because they are afraid of a bigger failure. Experience builds conversation but also confidence. When you have the opportunity to do something fun or adventurous, take that chance.

A quick example of this. My very first weekend I moved to D.C. happened to be the Friday of a 3 day weekend. My brand new roommate that I just met asked if I wanted to drive to Tennessee with him to go white water rafting down the Chattanooga River. He used to be an instructor there and could get housing and rafting free, all I had to do was split the gas. The housing ended up being next to the river in the woods where the instructors stayed over the summer. It was literally tree houses connected by wooden bridges. Imagine how peter pan lived. Power was limited and the river was where we cleaned up. A normal rafting trip was an hour and a half. We spent 7 hours on the river doing all types of crazy shit like jumping off huge boulders and diving into rapids. When asked, my other two roommates opted to not come with us and wanted to just get settled in. They missed out on this awesome opportunity. That was my only experience in Tennessee so far and probably the most fun white water rafting I'll get to do.

Back to the subject of approaching women. I generally see two kinds of people. Some that read more books and could critique the hell out of all of my interactions with women when it comes down to theory. If it were written out they'd be able to point out all of the things I've done wrong. I see it in forums all the time. My interpretation of this kind of person is that they want to read up enough so that when they do decide to stick their foot in the water and talk to women, they will be 100% ready for what is thrown their way. They want to be able to rely on their book knowledge of what to say and what to do in each instance. They keep putting off going out there and trying it out because they feel like they aren't quite prepared. There might be a scenario that they haven't read about or memorized. So they keep saying "I will start soon, after I read one more book." Their knowledge is vast but their practical experience is very limited.

The second kind of person may read a few books, understand the theories and just jumps out there. Sink or swim, they make approaches. They learn for themselves that some of the approaches they read about don't really work well in real life, or need adjustment on the delivery. Understanding the theories of these books, they are able to build on their social calibration. The theories no longer become the book's theories, but their own. They understand them through experience. They don't need to ask questions or go to forums to find answers. They try things out and have a practical idea if they will work or not. This is when they start straying from the text book ways of doing things and find their own path and method of what works. These are the people that make the most gains, and have the most fun.

If you want to get over Approach Anxiety and get better at women, then practice talking to women. If you have some insecurities you want to handle, then spend some time improving that part of your life. If you don't have anything to talk about, shut off the TV, get out of your apartment and do something worth talking about. You're whole life shouldn't be about any one of these subjects, it should be about all of them. You should be talking to women, hitting the gym and doing things you love to do. It's the balance that will make you most proficient.

Kino and Confidence is King

2010-06-25T06:12:00.000-07:00

Having tight game might mean that you can walk into a bar and have the ability to pick up the women open to meeting guys. Your percentage of number closes may be higher or you can open a 5 set with no problem....but how fast and how hard can you make that girl fall for you?

Thursday night I was out with two friends. We walk into a bar and it's an eclectic crowd. There wasn't an abundance of women to choose from but there were enough to give us a few options. There was a group of three women who conveniently were always in visual proximity of us. The most attractive girl was a tall blond with a big ring on her finger. The second most attractive girl was a tall brunette as plain as they come. The third girl was twice the size of me. We opted not to converse with them since it was 11 o'clock. Even a friendly conversation to feel out the blond girl could eat away too much of our valuable time. Time is a man's most valuable resource.

This place was on the water with a decentralized bar arrangement. There was one bar inside with the doors wide open to the patio, and a bar outside looking over the water. We got a round of drinks and ventured outside down the long strip of patio, resembling something like a pier. After being there 15 minutes I got a good idea of who was there for women, and who I'd like to talk to. I wrote off the three women following us around. I saw two girls in the corner of the bar and one woman wandering around with a really nice body.

As I was leaning against the railing outside, the girl with the nice body was walking my way. I took a step out to intercept and start talking when she stopped 5 feet away to talk to someone she knew. That was the reason she was walking in my direction. I was devastated. Just kidding. I watched them for 3 seconds and could tell it was not a meeting between two people who were attracted to each other.

Mean while, my friend was working on how to approach the other two girls I noticed in the corner of the bar. They had also made their way out to the patio. Standing about 15 feet away he opens the two girls while they were sitting down at a table. I stand back and let him do his thing, let his work his magic. Soon after they invited me over and introduced themselves. He was engaging Maria and I was talking to Jessica.

Jessica basically asked why I didn't initially come over when my friend started the conversation with them. I was letting him open, but I just told her I was really, really shy. She might have thought that was endearing but she soon found out I was the opposite of shy. We talked for about 2 minutes and she was sitting down. There were no seats, so I was standing up. This is an uncomfortable position for me and a more dominant position for her. I thought about how I could go about changing this positioning. There were no available chairs around so I just told her what I wanted.

"Hey Jessica, I don't really like talking to you while your sitting down. It's uncomfortable for me."

"Ok, do you want me to stand up?"

"Well yes I'd prefer that."

"Ok, well hold on...(she asks the adjacent table if we could have a chair but it was spoken for) Well you could also sit on my lap if that would make you more comfortable."

She said this semi jokingly but I thought I'd go with it. I nonchalantly sit on her and continue talking as if nothing was awkward or different. We talked for a bit but I didn't really want to be sitting on her lap, so I stood up. It was more of a joke, and I think it worked out. She stood up and we leaned against the railing to talk. I told her I wish this place had a dance floor and she concurred. The way to win a girl over at a bar is to be more exciting than the average chump who wants to talk about where you live and what you do.

She continues to tell me how good of a dancer she is and I tell her how I invent my own moves and don't use the cookie cutter, standard manufactured moves like the shopping cart or the sprinkler. That's for guys who don't have their own moves. I pull her out to the middle of the patio area and I spin her around with my hand. We do a little dancing even though this is not a dance floor. She points out the fact that we're not on a dance floor and people might look at us. I asked her if she really cared what anyone else in this bar thought. "Good point!" she replied. I think it's a good thing to do something slightly embarrassing or risky together. A girl is attracted to a guy who has fun when he wants and the confidence to not care about the rest of the world around him. During our conversation we share our admiration for wine and good food. She is a little Italian girl who likes to cook. I like this.

I look over and my friend is still talking to Maria and things seem to be going well. I asked Jessica if she had a pen, and she got one out of her purse. I bring her over to the bar and grab two napkins. As always, we exchange numbers via bar napkins and a little note. I wrote that this napkin was redeemable for a glass of wine with an attractive and witty conversationalist. She wrote something along the lines of that being the golden ticket to be redeemed something something. I forget what it said and my friend threw the napkin away this morning because he thought it was trash from lunch.

My friends came over with Maria and we were all talking. I was secretly caressing her back as we were all talking. Then I leaned against the bar and put my arm around her and pulled her in, as if we had been dating for 4 months already. She put her arm around me and she became warm and tingly inside. The bar was closing so we were all making our way to the front. As we walked on we held hands. Then she turned around and did a sneak attack kiss, which is my move!

While we talked through out the night, I qualified her and told her about the things I like to do and the things I like in women. She complied and then I set future plans with her. Tuesday she is coming over to cook something. That's called a time bridge. It is essentially more important that the phone number. As we walked to our cars I of course made an attempt to go over her house, but she wanted to wait. Neither of us were drunk, and I had some late night plans so I didn't push it. I can wait until Tuesday. I walked her to the garage, on my way to my friend's car. She grazed her nails over my back and I lightly pulled her hair. I gave her a quick kiss bye but didn't make out. I did what I had to do and nothing more. Making out is just a tool to get laid, not something I do for fun. We went our separate ways.

We drove back to my friend's house. I texted my Providence girl the address and she was parked in front of the house by the time we got home. We had raging sex on his couch and then I went to sleep.

I made Jessica feel like we had a bond that most people couldn't accomplish in a two week span. I did it in 2 hours. This is why our first date is at my apartment. I made the moves I knew I had to do and controlled the frame of conversation and interactions. This is what social calibration can do. This is what testing, trial and error and practice can do. Tight game means you can pick up girls, but it also means you can build comfort and sexual tension. Kino and confidence is the key. Over the next 2-3 weeks I will set the standard for a casual relationship that could last for months and months.

Seattle

2010-06-16T20:53:00.001-07:00

As I write this post, I am sitting at this little wine/coffee bar, Fonte'. They had half price wine, half price apps and I had some work to get done.

I got into Seattle late, with nearly 8 hours of delays in Chicago. It was Tuesday morning by the time I got to my Hotel. I generally don't favor online dating, but I'm all for taking advantage of any opportunity that comes my way. On a whim, I decided to throw up a post on Criagslist. I swear you can find ANYTHING on Craigslist. I had a very low expectation that this would work, but I didn't really have anything to lose. I was putting most of my eggs in the basket of going out on a Tuesday night and finding a girl at a bar.

Tuesday morning I woke up after 4 hours sleep and checked my email. I got probably 10 junk emails. In the ad I put up, I asked to include your favorite book, to screen the scam responses. I got ONE with a short response and a book she last read. I followed up and she sent a picture. A blond girl who looked decent. This could go either way. Throughout the day on Tuesday we exchanged a few emails and we exchanged numbers. We then set some tentative plans for the evening.

I get back to the hotel and at this point we have plans to go out at 8, but no bar determined yet. As a man, even in a place you're not familiar with, you should decide what bar to go to and when. If not, you will end up at some middle of the road bar she suggested, like applebee's or some sports pub. She texted me and said "I don't know where to take you...what do you like?" I think most guys would of responded with something along the lines of, "anything is fine, I like everything, bla bla bla." Translated into, I'm not picky, I'm easy going, indecisive and boring. Instead I looked online and found a place that I thought looked like a place I'd like to spend my evening. Dimly lit, jazz music, big drink menu. So I tell her which bar, the address and the time I will be there. She agrees to meet there.

I showed up late around 8:15. I still felt there was a high probability that she would bail out last minute. The place was in an awkward location that was somewhat hard to find. It was hidden behind the initial row of buildings and I had to get directions once I got to the general area. She called for directions and finally made it to the bar at 8:30.

This bar was awesome, exactly what I was looking for. Earlier in the night she text'd me and said she didn't know what to wear. I told her I'm wearing a suit so dress up nice. I said this for 3 reasons:

1. I know I look and feel good in a suit.

2. I know I find girls more attractive when they are dressed up and so I'm setting the standard for her to look her best.

3. We are going out on a Tuesday night. Most people won't be that dressed up. It will make us stick out from the rest, and that will give her a sense of adventure...a bonding experience for the both of us.

She walks in and I notice she decided to wear her "little black dress" with a jacket. I know she was initially nervous to meet me but I think I calmed her nerves quickly. We sat at the bar and ordered drinks. This was a small, unique place where the bar tenders were good at making drinks, good at entertaining and they made you feel like they were there just for you! They have heavy hands and always make some extra for themselves and for you. When a girl doesn't know what she wants, she can explain what it tastes likes and they will start concocting drinks. You don't get this at Applebee's. There are no TV's blaring, distracting your attention from each other.

As I expected, she was kind of quiet. She was honestly much more attractive than I thought she would have been. I am partial to blonds and her little black dress was quite appealing. The bar tender made her a martini that she described to him. I had another glass of wine. I had her smiling and laughing, but she was still quiet. At times I would wonder if she was really that interested. Within the first 30 minutes I was slightly reassured when she said she was really happy she decided to come meet up.

Since this girl was so quiet, I felt as though I needed to keep her stimulated. This could take more than conversation alone. Once we finished our drinks I suggested we go look for another place. I told her I wanted to see Seattle. We walked to a place that someone had suggested earlier. I have found that suggestions by locals usually suck. The best research is done through Googling bars in the area, that way you can see pictures, read reviews and look at menus.

We went to 2 bars, and each were not the environment we were looking for. As a cab drove by, I flagged him down. I said, take us to the nicest bar in the area. To my surprise, he did just that. This place Peso's was a pretty fun place for a Tuesday night. We sat at the bar and ordered a round of drinks. The bar tender was a fun, young guy and came right over. We start shooting the shit and order our drinks. I also start talking to the guy next to us.

The guy next to us was celebrating a Laker's victory and bought a round of shots for us. At this point we are leaning on each other, my hand is around her chair and rubbing her back and side. We were alternating buying rounds for each other and it was my round. I pulled out my credit card and caught eyes with the bartender. He disappears for a minute and comes flying around the corner with another round, saying, "Ohhh no ya don't! You guys aren't leaving yet, this round is on me!" At this point I realized that I loved Seattle. So of course we agreed to stay for another drink. After going to this fancy jazz bar, walking all over Seattle, taking cabs, talking to crazy people and rounds being bought for us, she exclaims that she is having an awesome time. She has never gone out this dressed up on a random night and had this much fun with someone she just met.

We are comfortable with each other by now, but I know we should step this up a bit. We drove by a karaoke bar on the way to Peso's and I saw people inside dancing. After our second round of drinks, we closed out and checked out this other place. As soon as we walked in, I took my suit coat off and brought her to the middle of the dance floor. We didn't really need anything else to drink. We danced close, and shortly after started kissing. I only kissed her for a second and then pulled away and spun her around. You can't deflate the sexual tension by having a full on make out session. It's a push/pull relationship. Then, we left and went strait to my Hotel. The hotel was a beautiful place, very modern with it's own kitchen and living room area. She kept reiterating how she couldn't believe she met me off CL and how much fun she had.

It had been a while since I had bedded a young vibrant 21 year old. A few months at least. In the morning it was just as good. She was so laid back about everything, it was hard to believe she was that young. She was giving me a ride to work, since I left my car downtown. After I took a shower and changed, she came down to breakfast with me. We laughed because her wild blond sex hair and little black dress with 4" heels were quite the sight at the hotel continental breakfast. The women had their condescending looks. I could see the look of envy by all of the uptight business men there for work. When you realize that you create your own reality, this type of stuff won't make you feel uncomfortable. Everyone in that lobby wishes they could pull off the night we had...whether they would admit it or not...

1st Trip out to CA

2010-06-10T10:23:00.000-07:00

I got a new site out in northern California, one in Milwaukee, and I'm heading to Seattle on Monday. Recently while out in CA I went out with a handful of people I had never met prior to this trip. These people worked for the hospital. Some where in their late 30's and a few of the guys were in their mid 20's.

I hit the gym while they pre-gamed before dinner. I met up with them around 8:30. Most of them were half in the bag, probably 5 drinks in. After dinner we went to a little country bar next door. It was a Tuesday night so there wasn't much going on...the place was rather dead. We walked in and sat along the bar. Some of the guys we were with commented on how hot the bar tender was. I thought she was attractive, but nothing out of the ordinary. I don't typically try to pick up bar tenders, especially at bars like this. They are easily distracted by other drink orders and I don't take their flirtatiousness seriously. A good tip is a great motivator to act interested.

One of the guys I was with mentioned that there were no girls out. I pointed out the only group of girls I saw in the bar, in the far right corner. "Yea but that's all." He replied. As I always say, you only need one girl, you don't need a whole bar full of them. So we talked, drank our beer and eventually I excused myself to use the restroom.

As I walked towards the bathroom, I somehow felt a gravitational pull over to the group of girls. I didn't have to pump myself up to walk over, I didn't feel nervous or clam up thinking of what to say...I just walked by and delivered my go-to opener. I asked what was up with the dance floor. Why no one was on it and when it was going to get bumping. I forgot that I had to go to the restroom, and then I forgot I was there with a bunch of other people. I never ended up returning back to the group of people I had dinner with. They were nice enough, but I didn't feel an obligation to hang out with them all night.

Later on in the night, one guy did stick around. He asked if I could give him a ride home because everyone else wanted to leave and he wanted a few more beers. I told him of course....so I did end up talking to him at the end of the night. I got two girls' numbers earlier. This guy was older, early 40's. He was impressed by the fact that I found the only two girls in the bar that were attractive and managed to get both of their numbers. He's a traveling man, and has done alright with women and we talked about game.

I told him about how I like when girls write down their numbers on napkins, and how I tell them to be creative. I do that because when they have a tangible thing in their hand with my number, it helps secure the next date and prevents flakiness. I explained how I made each of the 2 girls jealous by dancing with each of them as they subtly talked shit about the other. "You shouldn't talk to her, she is a slut." I openly flirted with both to create that sense of competition. As they walked by and winked at me, or grabbed my hand just to say hi, this guy would just laugh. He told me how the rest of the people were criticizing me for talking to a girl that had a big ass...mainly the younger guy I was talking to earlier. It's funny how prior to me talking to her, he pointed her out as one of the only girls he found attractive. Her ass was one of the things I found most attractive about her.

After being in Northern CA, I made my way down to San Fransisco for a few days. I knew some people there that I had worked with in D.C. It was an interesting place. Next trip out to CA, I have a plan to rent a motorcycle and just cruise down Route 1. I also have a few dates lined up...

An Opportunity of a Lifetime

2010-06-07T22:20:00.000-07:00

I've called 911 three times in my life. First was in D.C. when I was going for a run. I ran passed a guy who had seemed to have over dosed on drugs after being beaten up pretty badly. This was at 11:00 am. He was having a seizure on the sidewalk and was just laying on the ground shaking. The cops somewhat revived him and that's when we realized he was pretty high on something. They took him away in an ambulance.

The second time was when I was driving home from Boston around 2 am. I hadn't been drinking but my girlfriend at the time was passed out in the passenger seat. As I drove down highway 140, a drunk driver drove passed on the wrong side of the road. The highway was separated by an entire grass median and this guy was probably going 80 mph right towards me. It was hard to tell which lane he was in, and seemed like an optical illusion right up until the moment I could really confirm he was on the wrong side of the road. It seemed like the last second that I pulled off as he passed. I called 911 and it left me in awe for a minute, after realizing how easily he could have hit me head on.

The third time was tonight. I have two sketchy neighbors who live across the hall who just seem like trash that doesn't belong around here. They don't work and they are always walking around the apartment complex. I try to stay as unpredictable as possible, but I generally leave for work around the same time, and they know I'm not around much.

I came home today from work and I found holes all around my deadbolt. An attempt to break it. Instantly I was filled with rage. I put my key in and rushed inside to see if somehow they made their way into the apartment. It was locked and turns out they hadn't been able to get in.

I put my stuff down and stood in the kitchen as I thought my head was going to explode. My heart was racing and my stomach was turning. I put on my jeans and running shoes. I grabbed my knife and shoved it in my pocket for a worse case scenario. Then I grabbed my keys and made a lot of noise, opened the door and pretended to leave. I locked and unlocked the door in one motion and headed down the hallway opening the two hallway doors. I opened them wide so they would slightly hit the walls and close slowly, giving me enough time to sneak back. I tip toed back to my apartment, which I left unlocked and quietly walked into my kitchen again. I pulled up a chair and sat in the dark for an hour, quietly, with the door unlocked....hoping so badly that someone would try to break in again. I also had some other weaponry by my side that is a little more effective than a knife. "a little" would be an understatement.

That hour went by quickly. Every noise I heard I hoped and hoped was my neighbor about to get the biggest surprise of his life. I thought of all of the ways I could do this. Do I hide behind the door in the kitchen so when they break in they rush into the living room, giving me the opportunity to shut the door and hold them hostage? Or should I hide in the living room behind the wall, surprising them with a bat to the face and legs? I could sit right at the kitchen table, with a world of hurt pointing in their direction, welcoming them into my apartment.

The hour went by and I thought they may have saw their opportunity to break in was now gone for the day, since people are around more in the evening. My next thought was to go purchase a metal case to cover the dead bolt and come home. Then in the morning, take the day off work, move my Jeep to the other side of the parking lot and sneak back into my apartment. I would put the case on after staking out in my apartment for the day and waiting for their second attempt.

I leave and go to check my tool bag to see if I have a metal case for a deadbolt. I found one I had bought a long time ago. It may not be the right size but I don't want to leave my apartment for too long. I come back shortly after. As I look down the hall, 6 doors down, I see that long haired, skinny drug addict son of a bitch standing in front of my door. My level of rage skyrockets. I want to cause this guy as much pain as humanly possible. My initial response is to charge down there and break his neck and then stomp on his face until I break everything. The only problem with this situation is that I am not IN my apartment, and this could just look like a fight in the hallway. Or it could look like just a sheer massacre. I am torn. After thinking about the possible outcomes of both scenarios I walk out front and call 911 so that he can't hear me. I tell them that I am watching someone break in my apartment as we speak. I wait out front and make sure they don't try to actually escape with any of my shit and the cops are there within 10 minutes.

The cops follow me in and we look down the hallway again and he is still standing in front of my door. I can't believe he is STILL there. I see the look of panic in his eyes as I walk towards him with two police officers. I see him almost run and then the look of defeat. We get there, they hand cuff him and start asking him questions. The police go into his apartment across from mine and pull out the other guy. As they search the apartment I am standing next to my handcuffed neighbors staring without even a blink, catching their pathetic looks every so often. The other officer looks at me and shakes his head in disgust at how low these guys are.

The long haired guy had a pick in his pocket and was trying to wedge the lock open when we showed up. His buddy was in the apartment. The long haired guy went to jail and the other guy got to stay. I thought about how my neighbor that didn't go to jail might feel angry about the situation, and may want to try and seek vengeance on his buddy's behalf. For that very reason, I opted to stay in my apartment tonight...I've been waiting for this moment since I was a kid. I've dreamed about it. I can't sleep...

Back

2010-06-02T17:07:00.000-07:00

I apologize for the temporary unavailability. Things will be back on for posts and comments...Thanks for the emails...

Age Ranges

2010-05-15T07:53:00.000-07:00

This has been my observation when dating different age ranges of women.

18-22 range
They are intrigued by the fact that I am older. It rarely takes more than one date to have sex. I've noticed they usually don't like wine and prefer making really really stiff drinks when we hang out. I let them make our drinks, and tell them I will be judging them as a person by how they mix it.

They get attached easily and are very jealous. Although they are fun, their shelf life is usually short...a month to 6 weeks of a casual relationship. They can also be more flaky than other age ranges, and they still think it's cool to try and bring you to parties.

22-25 range
At this age range is when they start expecting more out of dates. I find it harder to just invite them over to my apartment to get drunk as our first date...we usually have to start at a bar before I bring them home. These girls are of course looking for a future husband, but they aren't feeling the pressure quite yet. Their friends aren't all married yet, so they are alright with having casual relationships. I can manage to keep these girls around for a good 6 months or so before they find a guy who will commit to them. If they don't find someone then they usually reach a point where they decide they will give me the ultimatum of either dating them exclusively or not having them at all....then I tell them we can't see each other anymore. At this point the relationship is over even if she changes her mind.

25-29 range
Danger! Danger! Danger! This is the danger age range. These girls are realizing they need to nail down a husband soon. Their friends are getting married, some are already pregnant or have kids. Although I don't turn down sex from girls in this age range, they are the quickest to ask "where is this going?" I tell them honestly that I just enjoy what we have and I don't want to get any more serious than we are. They will entertain this for a bit, but it doesn't last long. They have a sense of entitlement that cuts our relationship short. The thing I do like about this age range is that they usually have their own place, they are usually confident in the bedroom and can take a good hard fucking. It can sometimes take up to two dates to actually bring them home.

29-34 range
I've found that most of the women I've dealt with this age range were girls that married early, found out that it wasn't as magical as they thought when they were 20, and got divorced. Now they fuck like animals. These relationships can last years since they don't ever have the desire to be married again.

35+
Cougar land. This is a real thing folks. Cougars are easy but there is a lot of compromise. They aren't as good looking as they were 10 years ago. They are just looking for a young piece of ass and will fuck you whenever you want. A lot of the cougars I have kept in my rotation are the ones who have money and had surgeries to keep their bodies in as prime shape as possible. They know what the relationship is. There is no attempt at cuddling, there are no sleep overs. We do our business and that's what our relationship is...all business. Cougars are fun every once in a while, a good story to tell, but should by no means be your prime targets.

Of course there are girls that are outside of the bell curve. I date all types of women because that way I can enjoy what I like about each of them.

Happy Uncomfortable Mother's Day

2010-05-10T17:23:00.000-07:00

I'm on a flight to Texas, Dallas Ft.Worth to catch a connecting flight to Denver. I checked in early and was able to grab an exit row. I love airports. I always see beautiful women walking around. I'm not talking about the college girls who show up to life wearing sweatpants, sweatshirts and flip flops. When I travel, I don't wear what I wore to bed the night before, I prefer to look a bit presentable.

I board the flight, throw my carry-on under the seat and pull out my book. I had a window seat, even though I prefer the aisle. Window seats are for sleeping. I used to go out the night before flying, thinking I could catch up on sleep while in the air. Now I feel like getting a good night sleep proves to be a better flying experience.

People are walking up the aisle, trying to jam their carry on suitcases into the left side storage areas, even though the right side is the larger units made for the rolling cases. The left side is for back packs and blankets. A flight attendant steps into the exit row and sits in the middle seat. Usually they have their own little fold down seats, so I was surprised she had taken up an actual seat. Once she got settled we exchanged the routine hello's. She's relatively attractive with shorter hair and a nice smile...probably one of her better features. The third party in our three row seating plan showed up. An unattractive, larger Asian girl. The two of them got talking and the Asian girl was in the Marines as an aircraft mechanic.

I eventually put my book down and joined in the conversation. I talked about my experience as an aircraft mechanic in the Air Force. Eventually the girl on the end went to sleep. She had a long night the night before. It turned out the flight attendant, Amanda, was making a connecting flight as well. She was working the follow up flight but was just a passenger on her way to Texas. We talked about work and our home towns etc. She was from Pittsburgh area. I guessed she was in her mid 30's with no kids. Before we exited we exchanged phone numbers.

A few months later, I am heading down to Pittsburgh for a site visit. The only day I could fly down was on Sunday, and it just so happened to be Mother's Day. The traveling was nice since there were fewer people in the security lines and I got to sit with an empty seat next to me. The flight was delayed an hour so I went to the Legal Seafood in the terminal and had a large baked scrod lunch. As I'm sitting there I remembered I met Amanda and how she was stationed out of Pitt. I sent her a text and asked how things were going and if she was in the area.

Amanda responded immediately and said she was around and if I was flying in I should stop by. I thought that sounded like a good plan so I told her I'll let her know when I land.

I took a nap on the plane and finished my book. Before I knew it we were touching down and the flight was over. An hour and a half, not bad. I checked in to the rental place and picked up a Chrysler 300. I text her that I was leaving the airport and if she wanted me to stop by to text me her address.

I have a GPS. When I'm in new cities almost weekly, it comes in handy. One thing I hate is when all I want in an address but the person I'm talking to insists on giving me landmarks and directions! Amanda starts asking if I have passed Bridgeville or Sidelines yet. I have no idea...I stop in and grab something to eat because I'm starving and she keeps texting me, asking what I see. I just start to ignore her.

I put in the address to my hotel and I head in that direction. I believe Amanda is in that general direction. I ask her one last time for the address and she tells me to get on 79S and it's just a few exits up. That was irritating, so I decided I'm not going to drive around looking for 79. I don't even know where I am. I'm driving for about 10 minutes and then I see 79S. I was just about to blow past it and just go to my hotel early, and the last second I took the exit. I always think, just what if...what if this ends up being fun.

While she is texting me play by play directions on how to get there, she mentions her family is still over. I completely forgot that it was Mother's Day! It's about 5:30 at night so I thought maybe her family was leaving soon. She tells me which house it is on the street I'm pulling on to. I pull up and there are 4 or 5 cars parked around this little house.

I get out and just walk up to the door, knock and wait. Amanda comes to the door and invites me in. She is a little older than I remember. I walk into the living room and it's an interesting set up. It looks like a house that might be out in Arizona, made of clay perhaps. It's an orange pastel painted room with a texture on the wall giving it that clay look. Random pieces of art such as metal lizards and a big spiral sun were hanging on the wall. I walk through the little doorway and into the kitchen.

I walk in and her kitchen is small with a table that takes up half of the room. Squeezed around the table is her entire family, with a few brothers on the outskirts just sitting on stray chairs. The two brothers at the edge of the room and the couple closest to me sitting at the table all introduce themselves and shake my hand. Then I was introduced to her parents and the three dogs sniffing my crotch. I was interrupting a family game of Gin Rummy. Her youngest brother was still probably 10 years older than me.

They made room for me at the table and Amanda poured me a glass of red wine. They made conversation and were pleasant people. I know they were wondering who the hell I was and what I was doing over there on Mother's Day. I'm not sure if she told them that we just randomly met on a flight a few months ago. I got the feeling they knew, but the subject never came up. I told her Mom that I just wanted to hang out with someone's Mom, since I was traveling and didn't see mine.

After I finished my glass of wine I wanted to leave. Amanda came over to the table to show me a scrap book just as an argument about the rules of Gin Rummy broke out. I've never seen a man, her father, get so angry about a game. He was legitimately pissed off. I looked at pictures of when she went to Costa Rica and she awkwardly told me the background stories of nearly every picture. At this point I was shaking my head listening and being interested, but screaming 'I don't give a fuck' in my head. She was flipping the pages, so I pretended that I really wanted to look at a picture. I took the book and looked at her zip lining through the rain forest pictures, and then started shuffling through each page with rapid speed.

Finally I finished the book and put my wine glass in the sink. She offered me another glass. I declined but we ended up talking in the living room. She thought her family would have left by the time I arrived, she said. I could have waited it out I'm sure. One of her brothers started packing his things, but I wanted to check into my hotel.

I went back into the kitchen and said by to everyone. Then I gave Amanda a hug and was on my way. She would like me to come by next time, suggesting we grab a drink at a bar. I don't know how I feel about it.

I think she was significantly older than me, but just never had kids and kept in shape. As I was driving away, I started laughing to myself because that was one of the most awkward situations I've put myself in. I kept thinking back to the second I walked into the kitchen and I saw her entire family playing cards. Then I thought about the conversation that was probably going on right then. "Who the heck was that guy Amanda? How old is he??? You just randomly invited him over here?" Ah well...it was good for a laugh...

Saving Money

2010-05-07T10:01:00.000-07:00

Dating can be expensive. Point blank. Taking women out on dates, dinner, drinks and your own personal expenses can run you pretty broke by the end of the month. Having no money to do what you want can be pretty stressful and aggravating. You reflect on all of the stupid things you bought that month and how you could really of used that 25 dollars you spent buying a round of drinks for people who will most likely never return the favor.

This was happening to me time and time again due to a few unseen costly events. (My car getting smashed into by an unregistered, uninsured driver) So that doesn't help when you're trying to work your budget. Here are a few of the things I do to save money and a few of the changes I made.

Cable and Internet:
I live by myself so having a full on cable and internet package could become quite costly. It could easily be $150 plus a month. I got a cable package that cost 8 Dollars a month for about 20 channels. This gives me news, local sports and a few other channels. I used to watch more TV, but I haven't had anything more than basic cable for the last year or longer. At first I missed it, but now I don't think about it at all. It gave me more room in my budget and opened up a lot of free time in my life. For the internet, I have the basic connection and it is plenty sufficient for anything I need it for. If I want to watch a show on my television, I can watch it on my computer and attach it to the TV with a cord that cost 3 bucks. So if you do have a favorite series, you wouldn't need to abandon it all together.

Haircuts:
For the last 2 years I have been cutting my own hair. I do a simple "fade" or whatever, but I like a nice clean haircut. If I got a haircut once a month, that would probably run 20 bucks a month. 20 dollars a month for a haircut that will probably be fucked up anyways. I used to go to these supercuts type places and 8 times out of 10, the girl would screw up. It did take me a few trys to become good at it, but if I messed up that bad I could just go get a hair cut. Now, I never mess up. I know exactly how I want it cut and I can do it every 2 weeks if I want. This might not be something you'd be willing to try, but it can be done.

Eating Out:
This is an obvious one. Once you start relying on cooking food yourself, you realize how easy it is to cook something up quickly. I buy a value pack of 8 or 9 chicken breast or pork, put them in zip lock bags, two per bag, and freeze them. Each morning I throw one of the frozen bags into the fridge and it is thawed out by evening. I cook some up for dinner and lunch the next day. If I have time I cook something fancy and delicious. If I'm just hungry I chop it up and cook it withing 8 minutes. If you make a conscious effort to not eat out, especially places where you need to leave a tip, you will find a lot more money in your account! (And you will probably eat much healthier as well)

Phone Service:
A year ago I bought a blackberry. I will admit that I loved it. I could send and receive emails, search the internet for things, message people...it was a cool new piece of technology. The novelty started to wear off when I'd drop my phone and it would shut off and take 20 minutes to turn back on. Or when the navigation thing would freeze up when I'm trying to get somewhere because I had too many "apps" going at once. I started to get angry with how much grief this phone was giving me. So then I reactivated my old G'z One phone and I have never been happier. I can slam this thing on the ground and it won't shut off. I'm not worried about damaging it, and every time my phone makes a noise or vibrates, I know it's someone sending me a message directly. A sense of freedom from being so connected. Now every time I get a piece of junk mail or FB update I'm not checking it through my phone. I thought I would miss it but I haven't in the least.

Gym:
I thought about going to a cheaper Gym or canceling it all together and just lifting on the road (where it could be expensed). Truth is, I think this is an expense that is worth the 30 dollars a month. Planet fitness is 10 dollars a month but it's a shit hole...It's an idea I entertained though. I do buy my supplements off the internet rather than GNC, probably saving me 30-40 bucks an order.

Dating:
Roosh talks a lot about Cost Per Notch and how much you actually spend in banging a girl. I don't keep track of it, but I do make mental notes as to how much I spend on dates. Here are a few tips on how to not spend money.

A. Never, never, never, never go to dinner. This is a bad financial decision and a bad date decision. Take her to a bar instead.

B. Don't let her pick the place to go. This is to avoid her picking a place that is overly expensive and it is your duty to lead the date anyways. So again, letting her choose could be a bad financial decision and a bad date decision. Be the man and tell her where you are going.

C. Don't meet up too early. I like to meet up around 9ish, and I only go out during the week. This way you're not at the bar all night running up your tab. There are other reasons why I like meeting up at 9 as well...

-Sub point: After 2 drinks if you don't feel comfortable asking her to go home with you, bring her to another bar. It's always a good idea to switch venues during dates, and if you pay the tab for the first bar, she may pick up the tab for the second.

D. If applicable, stock your apartment with cheaper (Yellow Tail) wine and liquor. This way after a few drinks out, you can come home and make a few drinks at your apartment to finish off the night.

E. If you've banged her before....don't meet up with her at bars. Just have her over or go to her place for drinks. After you've fucked a few times, there will be no need to have a few drinks to ease anyone's nerves. You can just enjoy a glass of wine or two and get down to business.

On average I spend less than 30 dollars on first dates, and that is with leaving a good tip.

Impulse buying:
Don't buy it. The clothes you have are fine. You don't need a new watch. When I have money, I sometimes want to buy new shit I don't need. The best way to double your savings is to fold the money you have in your hand and put it back in your pocket. Also, if you want better clothes, try getting in better shape. That same old tee-shirt looks better when you can see your traps and chest filling it out.

So these are the some of the basic ways that I started to save a significant amount. Other things like avoiding round buying fiasco's at bars and group dinners can save that 60-80 dollar dent in your budget. There are better places to spend the money we are wasting on some of these fruitless luxuries.

Go-To Opener

2010-05-02T18:29:00.000-07:00

Since I began reading about pick-up a number of years back, I've noticed people have been trying to move away from canned material. I'll read through forums every now and again and I see a lot of people giving the advice of "just be yourself" or "just start talking to her." That's not really great advice.

When I first started, I used a lot of canned material. It was what Mystery preached. It got the conversation started and got me through the next few interactions. When I say canned, I'm talking about things I've read that were identified as openers. I'd search the internet, read through books and use them when I went out. I got great at the delivery of the opener, but then I wouldn't have much to follow up with. The conversation would go stale and I would rack my brain for something to say.

Now I do more situational openers. Most of it is off the cuff, something I see or find funny. I am now much better at keeping conversations going. I think the definition of canned material is debatable. I use a lot of the same openers now, and I have told a lot of stories over and over since they are funny, and the subject comes up. Even though this is my own stuff, it is still technically "canned" since I have told it before. The people preaching to stay away from it, I assume, are referring to the things you'd see on The Pick-Up Artist. "Who lies more, guys or girls?" type stuff.

Think about when you walk by a girl and you want to go talk to her but you can't think of anything to open with! Or maybe you are just nervous and not having anything to open with is an excuse to stay in your comfort zone. For both of these situations you should have a go-to opener. This way you don't have to think about it...you just go.

I have a few that I use often as my go-to's. Different situations render different openers. When I'm at a bar that doesn't have a dance floor but has a lot of people standing around, pubs for instance, I always ask girls when they are opening the dance floor. When I'm traveling, I will ask anyone where anything is, and it usually works best when I'm standing right in front of the place. I do this back home as well. I will ask about something that someone has...their phone is a good one because my cellular device is bullet proof and from the late 1980's. I then follow up with all of the "apps" I have on it.

My day game openers are nearly always situational, asking about something relevant to where we are. I still can get nervous when I'm doing my first or second approach, especially in day game. I have a method of dealing with this approach anxiety.

Let's say I'm at a book store and I want to ask a girl about the cook books since she is standing in that section. I will, for that quick moment in time, pretend that I sincerely want to know about cook books. If I can trick myself for just that one second, then I'm not doing an approach I'm just asking a question. I forget that I am even asking a girl at all...she is just someone who may know the answer. This relieves my AA for that one second and I just plunge right in. If I can make her laugh or at least smile within the first 30 seconds then my nerves settle and I go into auto pilot.

My weeks are usually pretty full between things I have to do, and women I am going out with. Going out and getting 5 numbers a week would be a surplus. Instead I get about 2 solid numbers a week. My conversion percentage is very high since right now I don't bother with weak leads, and I have become and expert at 1st and 2nd dates. I consistently have new girls because I utilize my go-to openers and don't let AA deter me. I don't get every number of every girl I talk to, but I start enough conversations that I never have a scarcity of women.

So come up with a general opener that could work in a number of situations. Use it often so that you become comfortable saying it. Tweak it and try wording it different ways to see what gets the best response. Become familiar enough with it so that when you see that girl, and you only have a 2 second window of opportunity, you can at least open without hesitation.

Frank vs Tom

2010-04-28T10:37:00.000-07:00

I've been seeing a girl for a little while now and she matches up with a lot of my interests. I have built this relationship from the ground up. She knows I need ample time to myself and with my friends. I set the standards and boundaries from the beginning and she willingly abides by them because she knows it's in her best interest. Because of this we get along well. She makes a good time better and I still have the freedom of a single man. Freedom is usually the first thing to go in a beta relationship. The grass is always greener wherever I am standing.

She invited me up to Maine for a weekend away, hanging out at her family's cabin. The only stipulation is that we are having dinner with her mom Rachel, and aunt Ruth, on Saturday night. I know her family and dinner parties always turn into a lot of empty wine bottles and loud music. I find out that her newly single mom and aunt are bringing dates who I've never met. I'm realizing that this night has the potential to be hilariously awkward...

That Saturday my girlfriend went to visit some friends, get her hair done and do things that girls do. I took the car and went up the street to a coffee shop where they had someone playing classical music on a keyboard in front of the outdoor patio. I relaxed in the sun, drank some coffee and read my book. The Kite Runner....good book if you're looking for one.

We headed back to the cabin around 5 and called to see what the plan was for dinner. Her mom was at the cabin and her date showed up early. We pull up, grab a few groceries out of the trunk and walked into the house.

What I mainly want to point out is the difference between the two guys that came over for dinner. The difference between an alpha male and a beta male.

We walk in and her mom is outside with her date, Tom. She is showing him the garden in the back yard. They walk in through the sliding glass door and Rachel introduces Tom to her daughter and to myself. When I look at him, my first impression is that he looks like a nice guy. He seems cheerful, overly happy to meet us. Arm stretched out, he eagerly came over to shake my hand. We start talking about the same old boring small talk. I liked the guy, and if I could say anything about him I would say he was just a really nice guy.

We hung out for about an hour. The girls started preparing the food, washing it, cutting it up. He helped out until they didn't have any more petty tasks to hand over to him. Around 6 the second couple showed up, Ruth and her date Frank.

Ruth is this rich cougar who dates younger guys. She lives in an enormous house in Portland, drives a Porsche and has had who know how many plastic surgeries. I was curious to see who would walk through the door with her.

I hear them scuffle down the entrance hallway and then they entered the kitchen. This guy was much taller than Tom. He walked in and introduced himself to everyone, not waiting on an introduction by Ruth. Knowing how my gf's aunt is, this guy's appearance didn't really surprise me. Tall fella with dyed blond hair, just on the top, thick gold chains exposed by his open collar and lack of an undershirt and sun glasses sitting on the top of his head. His style was a bit over the top and foolish, but he wore it proudly.

The girls worked on the side dishes and we went out back to cook up the burgers on the grill. We reconvened when everything was done and sat down at the dining table. I took the head of the table and Frank did a lot of the talking. Everyone was talking about how they met....both couples met on Match.com. The new wave of dating I guess. Tom talked about Rachel and you could see the look of admiration he had, talking about their first date. It was magical. He had a forced twinkle in his eye, trying to create this illusion of a bond between him and her. Frank chimed in and said he didn't even like Ruth when he first met her.

"As soon as I saw her I thought it was never going to work. I thought to myself, she is not my type at all. I'm am usually dating younger women, fake this and that. It took me a couple dates to really see how great Ruth was and what she could offer." Finished up with a wink to her and then a head nod to me.

I thought to myself how that was such a text book comment. The delivery was great. Ruth was over there smiling away. He laid down the groundwork for that touch of insecurity, but then the follow up compliment. This was when I started to realize I liked this goofy guy.

We finished up dinner. The girls and Tom got up and started clearing plates. Frank and I stayed seated at the dinner table and continued to drink our beers. We talked about business and women mainly. He's telling me how he is still on Match, not actively looking for women, but he likes to check his top 10 matches every so often. I'm not exactly sure what that means but I can imagine they are women that just show up on his profile. He isn't telling me this in any sort of quiet fashion...he is doing the opposite. He says, "yea, I actually have Ruth check it for me and then I look at who the good ones are....Isn't that right Ruth?"

She is cleaning but listening just the same. She looks up and again agrees that he does do this.

"Ya see, I'm not looking for other women necessarily, I just need to keep her on her toes. It will remind her to keep in good shape and take good care of me...ya know what I mean?" He's explaining his tactic to the whole kitchen.

Once the kitchen was clean, Rachel began to yawn. She told Tom she was getting tired and was going to bed. I felt a bit bad because I could see that he wanted to stick around. I'm sure he was wondering why she wouldn't want to stay up and enjoy his company longer. He's done everything "right." He showed up early, helped prepare dinner, helped clean up, complimented her for no good deserving reason at all. Wouldn't a woman want this behavior from a guy? Is he not portraying the cookie cutter image of what a woman would want out of a guy? So Rachel walked Tom out so he could start his 40 minute drive back home.

I stayed up with Frank, Ruth and my girlfriend for a few more drinks. Frank went on to talk about how he wasn't a big fan of Tom, and how he actually didn't really like him at all. I thought Tom was harmless and an alright guy, he has just been putting women on a pedestal since the day he started talking to them. Then Frank started talking about energy, reading people and psychic reading. I am a good story teller, and I can hold an audience, but this was some impressive bull shit. I couldn't tell if he believed the stuff coming out of his mouth or not, but he had the girls captivated. He was talking about their past, reading their future and literally had them in tears at one point. It would take some practice to be able to pull this off, and read people with so much confidence that they believe whatever I say. My friend Hudson has perfected the cube routine better than I had ever seen it done and I know he would have appreciated this energy self actualization talk.

Frank had Ruth wrapped around his finger the same way I have this girl wrapped around mine. At one point he began telling me how he just started this relationship with Ruth and how he is showing her what he expects. How he has set the boundaries early as far as what he will allow. I told him about how I had done the same thing since day one and that is why right now I am a happy man. He could see it and I didn't even have to mention it. Tom on the other hand will go on to text Rachel tomorrow morning to see how she slept, and then call her in the afternoon to see how her day is going.

You may read results from some survey given to women about what they want in a guy. It will probably read, explaining they want a guy who is clean shaven, well groomed, a guy who shows up on time and opens doors for them. Truth is a women would be more attracted to a guy who cared less about what she wants and does what he feel like. You should always have the upper hand in even your casual relationships with women. If you don't, and you can't get it back then maybe you shouldn't be in that relationship at all. The women that I don't end up fucking because I won't do what they say are women I don't want to fuck in the first place. If you don't have some sort of filter for the women you peruse, and you don't have self set boundaries of what you'll allow yourself to do for a woman, then you are selling yourself short. What you'd be missing out on would be made up 10 fold on the other side...with better quality women.

Talking is overrated....

2010-04-22T18:54:00.001-07:00

The majority of girls that join groups on facebook such as "curvy girls are better than skinny girls" have the wrong definition of curvy girls. I would agree with this statement using my own definition. I'm about to go to a country bar for a few beers. My voice is still gone but I'm still pretty confident about the night. Talking is overrated....

Marathon Monday 2

2010-04-20T06:19:00.000-07:00

Time sure does go by fast. Yesterday was Marathon Monday here in Boston. It's usually a fun day to be out on the town. I ran the marathon a few years back and there is an insane amount of people out, cheering you on and celebrating. It's a fun event to participate in or be out for. I looked back at my blog entry from last year and it doesn't seem that long ago.

I had to work on Monday. I was hoping to go out with a friend of mine after. The pros of going out after work on Marathon Monday is that the bars tend to be full. The cons are that they are all usually way too sloppy drunk and you can't tell them apart because they all have red sox shirts and hats on.

I text my friend around 5 to see what the plan was. He was out, not having a particularly great time. We talked about how wingmen can fuck things up more than help...and that was the case for him. I'm sure if I had the day off we would be going from bar to bar and rocking out.

So after work, he said he was going to get some tickets to the Bruins game. I decided to just go to the gym and figure things out from there. I spent an hour working out and went back to the locker room. I checked my phone and my friend from Providence drove up and was going to the Harp with my other buddy. I threw my jeans on and met up with them.

The bar was pretty tame. We sat at a table, had a few beers and watched the Bruins game. I have known these two guys since 1st and 3rd grade, and we rarely get to just hang out and discuss life and events...so we didn't care too much about approaching girls. There were girls around, up at the main bar area. Of course I had the itch to go talk to them, but I lost my voice over the weekend. It sucks.

After two beers we close our tab. They had been out all day and were ready to go home. While things were wrapping up I texted a girl who lived in the area, who I had met at the Harp a few months ago. My friends end up leaving and I told them I may or may not meet back at their house. I had half a beer left. My plan was to have one more beer and talk to some girls, or go over this girl's house if she texted me back. There was a good chance she might not even respond and that would of been fine with me. I thought it might be interesting to try and pick up girls with no voice. I could muster out words in a raspy voice but I couldn't yell. I was thinking that after opening I could do some communicating through notes on napkins...until she invited me back to her house. Of course that is how I imagine things would go down.

Well this girl ended up texting me back. "Sex Panther? is that you?" Long story short, I go to her house, have a glass of wine and make sweet love. Asleep by 10:30 and back to work by 8:45, fresh and well rested after a well balanced night of things I enjoy.

How can I take advantage of everything I want to do when I want to do them? There is a lot to be said about being versatile. Roissy wrote a post about Opportunity recently. It's about the idea of saying hi to girls, and the amount of opportunity that is actually out there. I honestly feel that I am not a great pick up artist by any means, but I have a knack for taking advantage of opportunities, and being prepared for them!

Monday morning I woke up at 6:30, as I usually do. I checked my email, cooked some breakfast and began getting ready for the day. I have a big duffel bag I bring with me literally everywhere. I always pack for 3 day increments. This morning I put one pair of work pants in there and two collard shirts. I have a complete separate set of toiletries that are always in the end pocket of the bag. I throw a pair of jeans, work out clothes and some running shoes in the bag. I also carry my protein and a small, travel size iron. This might seem a bit of over kill but it's easy. Now I can go to the gym, get ready to hit the bar and then back to work in the morning. I have one bag that constantly has enough stuff for me to get by for three days strait without going home. I throw it in the back of my jeep and use it when I need it. This gives me the chance to take advantage of any opportunity I find, and if you pursue opportunity as much as I do you end up using your travel bag often. I think I've redefined the idea of "home" in my own mind and I am comfortable where ever I am. The only thing I need is the freedom to leave when I want.

The Googles

2010-04-18T20:54:00.001-07:00

I started paying my bar tabs with napkins. I write numbers on the napkin in increments of the U.S. currency and turn them in my with bill.

I also tried to buy the domain name "Thegoogles.com" today. It's spoken for but not officially up and running. I don't really understand how that works, but I put it on backorder on godaddy.com. I wasn't sure what I was going to do with it until tonight. I want to make it kind of like a search engine for questions. Like ask Jeeves. Except this will be like ask the googles. I will gather a few people with the last name Google and when someone posts a question, I will ask the Googles and see what they say. I hope they have a good sense of humor.

Last Trip to Wyoming

2010-04-16T10:46:00.000-07:00

I feel like I owe a solid post. The month of April has been pretty weak.

In the past I have heard and read complaints of the lack of good wingmen and how it can impede on going out. I will agree that a great wingman can help you meet women. It can make approaching women easier or help your resiliency if you get turned down. But a wingman can also hurt you. I have noticed that I don't work well in packs or with wingmen, and I'm better on my own. I have very few friends that I feel HELP my cause with women. All I need is an excuse to go out and I rely on myself to meet women.

It's a Wednesday night, the biggest night in this little town. Kareokee, and the whole town shows up. Cowboys, trailer trash girls, visitors, locals...all kinds of people fill this place up until 2 a.m. It starts to fill up around 11.

I am visiting this place with one other co-worker. I don't know the guy well, I've met him once before. He's read The Game, MM and whatever else. We've talked about it and as most people do, he grasps the concepts. My main critique for him is that he has some socially awkward tendencies. These issues with game take more than just reading through a book to fix. You have to have some sort of self awareness to be able to conquer these discrepancies. Regardless, I am excited to go out tonight and so is he.

My co-worker is going to someone's house to watch a baseball game from 5-8 and invites me along. I almost feel obligated to go since it is my home team playing, and it was a gracious offer, but I declined. I tell him I'd give him a call later. I have to hit the gym for a little bit, relax in my room and catch up on some reading. I can put the game on in my room and catch the score if I want.

Around 8 I give him a call. The game is in extra innings so I met up with him for the 10th and 11th inning and a few beers. I meet a few of his friends and they seem like decent guys. They live out here and are not quite as enthusiastic about kareokee tonight as I am. They have lived here for quite a few years, and moved from other areas of the country. This intrigues me because I find it fascinating that people move from a place like Connecticut to a small town like this, with a population of under 5,000 people.

We get some dinner at 1 of the 3 places to eat in this town. There are 3 of us at this point. I had a surprisingly delicious NY Strip with a bottle of beer. Then we go to the designated pre-game bar that everyone goes to. 50 cent Bud Lights all night long. I walk in and meet the social circle of people that this local guy hangs out with. A group of completely different people, from all different places hanging out together. One guy works as a coal miner. Another guy wants to be a speech pathologist and works at the middle school in town. Megan, the most attractive girl of the group, is a nurse at the hospital. There were 3 or 4 other guys, some with beards, tattoos and some that were more clean cut than myself.

On the other side of the bar I saw a short brunet girl that I haven't seen in 4 months or so. She was a bartender at the hotel bar during one of my past stays. She is a wild one...Shandi. I remember sitting at the bar and I wrote her a little limerick on a napkin and she swore to cherish it for the rest of her life. Later on that night she invited me to a house party and we made love in the bathroom. Right after I noticed her at the bar I looked down at my phone and she sent me a text. I stopped over and said hi, but only for a few minutes.

Eventually we left this bar and went on our way over to kareokee. By this time there was an entire table of us. We took a seat right in front of the stage and ordered a round of beers. Megan came with us, but she seemed interested in the local IT guy that worked for the hospital. I just sat and took in the night as it came. I had a small thing with the kareokee DJ at one time, but she wouldn't even look at me tonight. She was sitting next to her brand new fiance, a guy just barely 21. She was in her early 30's. She looked terrible, wearing a gray sweatshirt, completely unenthusiastic about being there, out of character from what I was used to. Later in the night she texted me apologizing for not saying hi, and that her future husband prohibits her from talking to other guys. She also informed me that this would be her last text to me. Jealousy ruins lives folks.

I don't do much singing, but I like to dance. I began cutting a rug on the dance floor and bumping into people I have met throughout my time visiting this place. The locals that we came with began to dwindle and head home early. To them it was just a regular Wednesday. To me it was my last Wednesday in this town forever. I know my co-worker was in for the long hall, although I could tell he was getting pretty drunk as the time passed.

There were not many girls to pick from. I tend to like the girls a little more on the wild side, if I have a choice. There was one girl with wing tattoos covering her entire back. Sitting by herself she was watching her friend dance. I decide to walk in her direction to order a beer from the bar. This is how my pick-ups work. I often make opportunities available rather than approaching so outright, at least in night game. As I walk by I look down at her and crack a smile. I see her smile back and I just keep on walking strait to the bar. Be cool, be casual and not needy. This is one of the issues my co-worker struggles with. I order a beer and lean on the bar, looking out at the dancing scene. Her back was turned to me, exposing her lack of interest for public acceptance, screaming her individualism with her tattoos. I could see her peaking around, anticipating my walk back to the other side of the bar. Her curiosity got the best of her and she turned around. We look at each other and she yells across the bar:

"You're not from around here are you?"

"Nope..." and I sit down next to her.

From here I try and work my magic with evasive answer and witty comments. Humor with a touch of defiance is how I woo most girls. If I am going for a one night stand, I try to find an opportunity to grab a fist full of the back of their hair while I ask them a question or compliment them. It's like flipping a sexual switch and letting them know I will not be gentle with them in the bedroom. It's a risky move and I don't suggest doing this all the time...it's something I feel out.

With this girl I traced my finger around some of her tattoos and ran my fingers up the back of her neck. As I grabbed the back of her hair I tell her I like her hair. As I pulled her head back ever so slightly, I ask her if she wants to go dance. It got pretty sexual from that point on.

At the end of the night, the lights came on. She asks me where I'm staying and what I'm up to, then invites me over for a few more beers. She lives up the road and her friend is staying over as well. Her friend was dancing with my co-worker, and was so drunk that she actually fell on the floor while trying to grind. It was such a bad fall that I felt uncomfortable.

Ends up, the four of us head back to her house. I expected a shitty little shack, but it was actually a really nice place. Her friend was beyond drunk. She stumbled in and laid out on the couch in the living room. I went into the kitchen with tattoo to get some beers and we started messing around. I could care less about having another beer, I just want to fuck. We hear some moaning from the living room and we walk in. My co-working is trying to make out with this girl while she is completely passed out. This is just desperate and embarrassing. Tattoo got pissed and I talked to him. I told him to sleep on the other couch because this girl was a) unattractive as hell and b) passed the fuck out. Either one of those reasons should force you to sleep on the other couch anyways.

I walked into this girl's bedroom, got in my boxers and jumped into bed. Finally, after she tried to talk through the situation in the living room, she came into the bedroom. She changed into something to sleep in and went to the bathroom. Next thing I knew my alarm was going off. I fell asleep. What the fuck.

In the morning I tried to make up for last night but she didn't want to. We could hear the two in the living room talking. Finally I got up and she gave us a ride home. She told me to come over on my lunch break, after she showered and everything...I thought about it all morning, but I knew I had to drive down to Denver that afternoon. I was flying out the next morning and I had made dinner plans that night with a girlfriend of mine out there. She had reserved two Denver Nugget's tickets in her company's suit. Catered with food and our own bar, I had to make the decision if missing that would be worth the 20 minutes of wild sex with Tattoo. I reluctantly skipped the afternoon sex and drove 4 hours with a hard dick. The game was great and I took out my sexual frustration on my Denver girlfriend. Unfortunately I think that was my last business trip out there...

Progress

2010-04-16T08:49:00.000-07:00

I meet girls often. I bring girls home and have a funny story to go along with it every once in a while. I've slept with more women than I could possibly count, and I continue to do it week to week...but I have to wonder....am I really getting any better at this? Am I even any good at it or am I just approaching the right number of girls? I haven't read a book about pick-up in at least a year. I'm sure I've forgotten plenty of things. I'd bet someone fresh to the game could pick apart my "field reports" with all of the things I'm doing "wrong." My pick-up strategy isn't as much of a conscious thought process as it once was. Now it's a three step process. Start a conversation. Have a good time. Try to bring her home. I am not loosing motivation to talk to women by any means...I am just wondering if I am making any progress.

She's talking to another guy...now what?

2010-04-01T08:42:00.000-07:00

When I'm dating a girl, I don't typically like to meet up with their friends at bars or parties, or anything. I like being the guy that all of her friends have heard about, but have never actually met. Ideally they would just come to my place for a few hours and leave before I go to sleep...but I budge every so often.

I went and played pool with a good friend of mine, and his older brother came along. His brother also brought his girlfriend and her friend, which was fine with me. They are both attractive girls with a good sense of humor, so I enjoyed them hanging out with us.

The girlfriend, Katie, did have a little bit of a flirtatious side to her. It was harmless and if you are dating such a girl, you should have expectations. So while we were sitting back in the bar area, Katie saw someone she went to high school with. He was sort of a younger, punky looking kid, but had some hot girls with him. She left our table to talk to this kid about 15 feet away.

My friend's brother was instantly furious. Instantly! I don't know if it was roid rage or what, but he got red and really quiet. Looking at the situation, Katie's high school friend was probably more attractive than my angry friend, he dressed a little more outrageous, and he seemed pretty comfortable talking to Katie. I could tell she was the pursuer out of the two, and he was just playing it cool letting her do all of the work. It can be fun watching the social interaction and I gave the kid credit...he seemed to have some natural ability.

As each minute passed I thought my friend was going to explode. I remember thinking...how would I handle this situation? I know how I WOULDN'T handle this...exactly how he was. This was the reaction of a man who didn't have options, and who has too many eggs in one basket. Dating one attractive girl and hanging on for dear life.

If you are out with your date, your girlfriend and a situation like this happens, here are the options you should cycle through.

A: Don't do anything. You can do this if you are an alpha male with the obvious upper hand, who knows he has more options. You wouldn't feel very threatened by the fact that your date is talking to another guy. Sit there, enjoy your drink with your friends and ignore the fact that your date is gone. When she finally returns, don't ask her anything about it who she was talking to. If she mentions, "oh that was xyz from high shool" then just a simple acknowledgment of the statement is fine, "Oh that's cool." This shouldn't be said with any attitude, and if you do feel any jealousy about her leaving then maybe this response option isn't for you.

B: Go introduce yourself. I have been out with girls and they see old co-workers or something and they start talking. Being the nice and talkative guy that I am, I may feel inclined to walk over and introduce myself. This is nothing aggressive. When you walk over, she SHOULD introduce you. If she just flat out ignores you, then I think you may have made some mistakes earlier in your relationship.

Once she introduces you then just join in the conversation. If it is just her friend, then you won't see much territorial pissing going on and everyone can have a great time. If you see he is trying to be the bigger man and even go so far as to try and embarrass you, then take a beer bottle and smash it on the counter and challenge him on the spot! Just kidding...Honestly I haven't had this happen to me too many times where a guy is trying to assume the alpha male position.

When it does happen, think about what he is trying to do. His goal is the attention of the woman. Getting into an attention battle with him is a bitch move. You should know that you don't beg for the attention of anyone. You might do some subtle things like call him the wrong name, not really pay attention to him correcting you and then go on your merry way. She should follow you...i.e. you win. Tyler Durden, the former PUA, talks a lot about controlling the frame and blowing guys out if that's your style.

C: Go talk to other girls: If you're at a bar and a girl is eating up the attention of some other guy, the best thing you can do is go talk to some other girls. The second she notices this, the tables will turn. Of course the more attractive and interactive with you they seem, the better. I have some canned openers I used when I first started pick up that can pull a group of girls in for a good 4 minute discussion about a complete bullshit situation. "My roommate just moved in with his current girlfriend, and he is still friends with his ex and..." These openers seem to stimulate emotional responses. This is all you need. She'll remember that she needs to keep your attention to keep you around. I tell girls from the start that I'm a wild stallion and that I don't know if there is a girl in the world that can tame me. It's funny to say and it gets a laugh, but I think they should know. Activities like leaving me to flirt with other guys will lead to an unhappy feeling in their stomach. Punishment and reward systems really do work wonders.

Something I always try to keep in perspective is that no one else should negatively effect the way you feel. There are millions of people in this world, so who cares about one or two. Letting shit roll off your back is one of the biggest learning curves of pick up, and once you start realizing it doesn't matter is when you can keep that positive frame going all night. Imagine if you were never afraid of failure, all the girls you could pull...Then think about how concerned you'd really be about her talking to some other inferior guy. You wouldn't be...

Quick Dates

2010-03-24T12:29:00.000-07:00

I just read that book "Up in the Air." I heard the book had a significantly different plot than the movie (as I suppose a lot of books do) so I checked it out online. It sounded like the movie had a little more of a romantic plot. The book intrigued me because the character was constantly traveling, to the extent that he didn't even have a tangible address to return "home" to. He flies around the country, consulting (firing) people, sleeping with women, and analyzing things. Moving from city to city, he has girls all over the country.

When I first started traveling, it became a challenge to follow through with the process of number closing a girl and being around enough to meet up with her again before the number went stale. I starting thinking that this increase in travel could impede on my game...but I also knew there was opportunity.

I get assigned a site and I visit there a half a dozen times over the span of 10 months. I would have a varying number of sites going at once. So my goal would be to build up small relationships with girls in these areas.

When I make the flight or drive out somewhere, I usually stay for 4 or 5 days before flying back. One of my strategies is to go out early in the week, the first or second night, and find a few prospects. If I number close, I tell them I'm leaving that week and try to meet up with them before I leave. What I have learned is that, in these scenarios it's not always beneficial to put in all your effort for a bang on your first date. Some girls need a little face time. They just met you so they may be reluctant to give it up so quickly. Since this is the case, you build your relationship a little bit slower, and at your convenience.

I will lay out mock situations, and how to handle them.

I am flying out on Tuesday morning to visit a site for a week. I have two girls that live in the Boston that I have been meaning to see. I know that I should see a girl at least once every 4-6 weeks to maintain the relationship. Girl A, I have been with before and really like sleeping with. Girl B I met last week and want to see her before I leave.

I tell girl A I'm leaving for a few weeks but I want to see her before I go. The only night I have open is Monday. She doesn't have plans for Monday yet so I set something up.

"Great, maybe I can stay at your place Monday night since you live close to the airport? That way we can hang out and I'll just take off in the morning"

"Yea, that sounds good."

"Alright, I still have a lot of packing to do and everything, so how about I come over around 10 or 10:30."

Sunday, I text girl B, who I recently met and have not slept with. She knows I travel a lot and I would send her a text:

"Hey, are you around Monday at all?"

"I think so, what's up?"

"I am taking off Tuesday but do you want to grab a quick drink or two at some point tomorrow night?"

I essentially I tell her I have to get things ready, but I could meet for one or two beers. I would meet her, at the bar, at around 8:30. We have two drinks and then cash out. Show up late. This way she has already bought her first beer, started her own tab and you don't have to buy hers. Secondly, showing up late will reinforce how rare and valuable your time is. For added DHV, wear a casual suit with no tie. Tell her you just got out of work. When you get there, don't be flustered, rushed overwhelmed. Just relax and enjoy that time with her. I don't tell her what time I need to leave, but I would just casually finish my drinks at the time I have to leave. Then close your tab, walk her to her car and kiss her goodnight. This is important. Stay for a good 15 seconds and make out, then tell her you'll give her a call when you get back in town. This secures you will see her again.

Now girl B has gotten some face time with you, and she likes you. You have accomplished an important wooing step and yet you haven't dedicated an entire night to her. Leave, go over girl A's house and do what you do best. Hang out, get a back rub, make sweet love and fall asleep.

At this point you should have already texted the girls in the city your visiting. Find a girl that is available for the second half of the week. Remember, the first half you have to do some day game style approaches and check out a bar or two.

The cycle would continue even in your visiting cities. You make plans with the girls you have already banged, and squeeze in little drink/coffee dates with the girls that you still need to spend time with.

You set the standard right from the start that you can only afford to offer bits and pieces of your time. You will notice that they will start clearing their schedule to see you. "I was going to have dinner with my friend, but I guess I can see her later..." The fact that they have work in the morning will no longer deter them from hanging out, because they know this is their one in only chance for a while. Supply and demand is a real thing. Even if you don't travel, it is still something to utilize.

How did you know my name?

2010-03-19T09:46:00.000-07:00

“So how did you know my name?”

I didn't really have a great answer...I didn't expect to guess it correctly.

“Well I didn't know it, I just guessed it and I was right...”

The two girls were attractive but a little older than me. I would guess in their early 30's.

“Well we are going to this bar over here, so why don't you come with us?”

I followed them into this Irish Pub . I sat to the left of Tracy and her friend sat to her right. She asked if I liked whiskey. A rough drink for a girl I thought. She ordered two shots from a 15 year old bottle. I told the bar tender I'd have mind on the rocks. I do like whiskey, but I'd rather enjoy it rather than just shoot it down. She had the bar tender do the same with hers. With work tomorrow morning, shots might be a messy way to start the night. Especially in a city on my own, I can't become complacent and drink too much.

The bar tender slides my drink over, I lean back and put my arm over the back of Tracy's chair. She turns towards me and starts the same routine of conversation...what do I do, where am I from....A lot can be said by just body language. You portray confidence with your movements and as far as conversation, sometimes with less you get more...

“I'd rather not talk about work.”

We talk about traveling and drinking. She hasn't traveled much but would like to and she is a whiskey enthusiast. Everyone wants to travel more. She does investigations for auto insurance fraud. I always wonder if those types of jobs skew the overall view of what the common person is like. I remember I had a job installing specialty blinds in overly expensive houses in Connecticut and Martha's Vineyard mostly. I would come home and it would seem like I had nothing compared to the beautiful houses I saw everyday. She claims it doesn't effect her outlook on life, but I am skeptical.

I engage her friend in conversation. Although I find Tracy more attractive physically, I think her friend seems a little more interesting. Shortly after we get to the bar, a guy sits down next to Tracy's friend and orders a drink. A minute or two later, I believe he attempts to open Tracy while I am sitting right next to her. A part of me thinks this guy is awesome for doing so, but I am also slightly insulted.

“Hey! Are you Irish??” He yells down the bar, pointing at her. I think she heard him, but didn't respond... “Hey...you!” She looks over. “Are you Irish?”

I look down the bar and I answer him,

“Yes I am! How did know that?”
“Not you...her! Are you Irish?”
“Yes I am, how did you know?” I answer again. I know he is talking to her but I think it's funny to keep answering him.
“I said I'm not talking to you.”
“Oh, I always assume that everyone is talking to me...”
“Well I'm not!”
“Well don't get angry, and I like your sweater!”

If he didn't get so angry right from the get go then I wouldn't have antagonized him so much. I would have been perfectly fine working in cahoots, trying to get him in with Tracy's friend. He tried with her for the next 15 minutes and finally they both went to the bathroom.

As soon as they both stood up, he went outside to smoke. They came back and Tracy asked if I could give her a ride home tonight. I checked on mapquest and she was only 6 minutes from my hotel, so I told her I could. I gave her friend a hug and she was on her way. I suggested the bar across the street for one more drink. It was a brand new sushi place that I heard good things about.

This place was nice, the kind of bar I like to take girls. We ordered two dirty martinis. She ordered hers extra dirty and mine, even a little on the dry side. I like the crisp taste of vodka with just a touch of olive. I also put in an order for eel. She was still in awe that I guessed her name, and a part of her still believed that we had met before in the past. I think I just have a familiar face.

We cashed out and the bar tender shook my hand. It was unexpected but I liked that. It had gotten a bit colder out since I parked my car so we walked quickly through the brisk night. Arm in arm, we got to the car and headed out towards her house.

When we arrived she directed me right to visitor parking. I just shut the Jeep off and we walked in. We didn't discuss it or make up a fake excuse for me to come in. I think it was decided when she asked me for a ride home. It was a town house, nicely furnished and modern. She had two cats, and for some reason that didn't surprise me. When ever I meet animals, I rename them with people names and call them that every time I see them.

She offered me another drink. I declined. There would be no advantages to having another drink at this time. I told her I was going to bed. One of my favorite quotes I read from a PUA blog was, “some people say always assume attraction...I always assume sex.” I strip down to my boxers and jump into her king size bed. Large for a single girl living by herself. She put on some lacy sleepwear and also climbed into bed.

“I can't believe you are in my bed right now. I never do this...” If I had a nickle....

I always start at the neck, take it slow and eventually roll over on top. That is the moment of truth. The most successful way to ease your way into sex is to get them as turned on as possible. This sounds intuitive but just making out with them doesn't turn them on as much as you think, even if you think you're a good kisser. There is a switch you need to flip. You have to pull out the bad girl side of her, that is the side that will fuck. Being passionate, soft and slow before you try to pull down her panties will not work, not for the first time, with a girl you just met. You have to firmly grip the back of her hair and have a constant, head tilting pull. You also have to lightly bite, but not enough to leave a mark. You want to turn her on, not actually hurt her.

After a minute into it, she tells me we should stop. She doesn't even know me and she's not like this. This happens and there is no arguing. If a girl doesn't want to have sex, then she doesn't want to have sex. You're instinct might be to debate with her why it's alright. There is only one way to deal with this, and it is more powerful than any argument you could build up. Just say, “Alright, you're probably right...” then roll over and go to sleep. She will want to talk, she will want you to hold her. Nope. My standard response, every time is...”I'm sorry but I'm just really tired and I have to get up early in the morning.” A large majority of the time she will engage you. If so, give it one more try. If she stops you again, then just go to sleep. She will keep you up all night with that bull shit.

Week nights are the best nights

2010-03-15T08:52:00.000-07:00

Last week I was in New York. It was a busy week at the site I was working but I did set out to do some day game approaches. I also had some dinner plans with a friend of mine. I get emails now and again...some people with questions, comments and the occasional insults. I suppose I like them all the same. I try to respond to everyone when I can....

"So I've been reading your blog for some time now...But I just want to thank you for being such an honest jerk about how guys really think. I am intrigued by the way you describe the girls you interact with, how it doesn't seem like you give a shit at all. But I think deep down there is a good guy right? Or am I just wishful thinking?"

So this is the young lady I had dinner with. We had an enjoyable evening filled with wine and conversation. It's what I enjoy most about dating. The fingernail marks on my forearm I suppose are just battle wounds, but she did buy me the three wolf moon shirt. Once I get that in the mail, I don't think there will be any stopping me.

On Wednesday I did quite a bit of work at a coffee shop. I went there strait after my presentations and just stayed in my suit. I have realized that looks won't necessarily make or break you, as long as you can come off with enough confidence, do interesting things with your life and have the ability to tell a good story. I also know that when you feel like you look sharp, it can get the momentum started. That's how I feel when I wear a suit. No tie, shiny shoes and a confident strut. Wednesday night is perfect. My theory is that you only need to find one girl to make your night...Friday and Saturdays can be a bust with all of the girls out, getting hit on by drunk guys in an environment that is too loud to talk in. But on a week night, walking down the street, looking sharp...opportunity lies ahead.

After preparing for the next day, it was rounding 10:30 pm. Time for a drink. I pack up my lap top and throw everything in my Jeep. Spray a bit of cologne and walk towards the bars.

There are two girl's outside, evidently deciding on what bars to go to. Approach everyone. You want to get in a more talkative mood, you want to get a closer look at the girls, and you want to see if they are the kind of girls you want to pursue.

"So I'm looking for a great bar on a Wednesday night, what do you guys suggest?"

"What are you looking for?"

"Dancing, singing, women, overly priced drinks....what are my options?"

"Haha well I don't know if we can find all of that tonight. Do I know you from somewhere? You look familiar?"

Whenever a girl says that, IOI. They want to know you...

"No Tracy, I don't think we know each other..."

I am an advocate of making assumptions. It stimulates more conversation, but I think guessing a girl's name is making too much of an assumption. I'm not even sure why I decided to guess her name, or why I chose Tracy. Her reaction surprised me...

"What? So I do know you?"

This was the second time in my life that I guessed a girl's name out of the blue and was correct.....

Push Yourself

2010-03-08T05:48:00.000-08:00

Just got back from an awesome weekend up in Vermont. I rented a cabin for 15 dollars a night. I went snowboarding with a few friends from Quebec City at Jay Peak. These guys have been skiing and snowboarding since they were able to stand. I have been doing for about 3 years now. After moving back to the north east, I needed a reason to look forward to the winters.

I am typically aggressive when it comes to sports so I picked up snowboarding pretty quickly. I started going by myself until I was able to keep up with a few of my friends. I would always try and push myself to the point where it made me a little bit nervous. Jay peak is one of the better mountains on the east coast. It's right under Canada and has some good trails.

I met Oli and Yeve at the mountain on Friday morning. I got there an hour before they did so I did a few run on my own. They got there around 11 and I met them at the base of the mountain. Once they were ready we took the lift to the top of the mountain. We boarded over to the edge of the first slope and strapped in. We stood over one of the steeper parts of the mountain. I would typically go down these same trails, but I would carve back and fourth and slow myself down a bit.

Oli and Yeve jump forward and glide towards the decent. Right before they go over the edge Oli looked over... "Ready??"....I knew keeping up with them was going to be a good push of my abilities. I nodded that I was ready, and we started down the mountain. No one was on the mountain and it had recently snowed. The powder is much easier to board in. They crouched and headed strait down the mountain. I followed suit and stayed to the left. I fought the urge to carve right and slow myself down. This was the fastest I had ever been snowboarding for this extent of time. The thought crossed my mind that if I tripped up, I would probably be in some serious trouble. I was halfway down the slope and I kept picking up speed. I made the decision to commit to finishing the slope and ride it out. As I got to the bottom, the trail turned to the right and I closely followed. I could feel the g's pulling as I flattened out. I hit a bump and the speed itself sent me airborne. I almost panicked but stayed calm, landed it and kept on riding. The bottom half of the mountain was not nearly as steep but was fun carving through it.

They pushed me to ride hard for most of the day. As the day went on I became more comfortable going that fast down each of these slopes. It was the fastest I had ever ridden and it was exhilarating. My comfort level expanded.

You need to accept that challenge of stepping out of your comfort zone to make progress in any aspect of your life. I was afraid of public speaking, but it was something I wanted to become good at. Now I do it on a daily basis and it is exciting for me. I am working on putting together a stand up act and I'd like to try it at an open mic night. Honestly, it is a terrifying thought, but something I want to do.

The same goes for pick-up. How do you get over approach anxiety? You just do it and deal with your nerves until you become more comfortable with it. Then you get better at it. Then you get a date with a girl that, at one point in your life was way out of your league. You might get nervous and make a ton of mistakes. Soon this girl will become par for the standard of girls you date. The more you put yourself out there, the more comfortable you become in all of these situations. When ever you start feeling that discomfort and you want to bail out, reconsider and commit! You would be surprised what you're capable of. Those little adrenalin rushes are what remind us that we are still alive....

I'm heading to NY today. My goal is to do more day game approaches while I'm out there. I think day game is more conducive when being on your own. Especially when you're from out of town, it is the perfect excuse to start a conversation. I need to set goals for myself. It helps to push outside of that comfort zone and track the progress. You just have to do it. What you do is infinitely more important than how you do it.

Working Out

2010-03-03T13:53:00.000-08:00

Fitness is a large part of my life. It is something that I enjoy and something that I feel helps keep me balanced. I enjoy the alone time in the gym. I think about the gains I'm making, think about the next set, the next rep and dismiss any thoughts of work, financial issues, car troubles, women, etc. Although it is a high energy activity, I find it very relaxing.

Regularly going to the gym or being active will help you in many aspects overall, and can make a direct impact on your pick-up. It will make you stronger, more confident, and more physically appealing to women. Putting the gym first will let them know you care about yourself, and that you have priorities. By default you will be less available, making you a more wanted man.

If you're not too familiar with the basics, I will outline the guidelines I follow. If anyone has other input feel free to add.

Getting in shape is a 3 part process.

1) Your diet. This includes the food you eat, the supplements you take, and when you eat and take these supplements.

I generally eat a large breakfast with at least 40g of protein and a multi-vitamin. Eggs and oatmeal are pretty typical. If you're trying to build muscle, one rule is to match the grams of protein with your body weight or have an intake 1.5 times your weight.

I have a mid day snack then eat a large lunch. I also try to eat something small before I hit the Gym. Fifteen minutes before workout I take a pre-workout drink such as NO Explode. After you workout it is important to get protein in your system. Again, at least 30-40g's within 20 minutes after you work out so that your muscles have nutrients to regenerate. If you skip this, your gains will be cut by a large percentage. I also follow up with a post workout drink such as Anabolic Halo.

Get your carbs in during the day. For dinner I do a high protein low carb meal. Red meat is good because it has a lot of casein protein which breaks down slower. I try to eat before 8 pm.

Protein: I use two different types of protein, whey and casein.
-Whey breaks down fast so it's good to take during the day and right after you work out. I generally don't take in more than 40g at any given time because that is the most your body can handle at once. Any more and it's just overkill.
-Casein breaks down slower. This is good to take at night before going to bed. Making one of these shakes prior to going to sleep will let the protein digest while you are sleeping, feeding your muscles while they rebuild.

Creatine: I think anyone in the gym should cycle some sort of creatine product. It's been around a long time and has proven to be beneficial and not harmful if taken correctly.

Multi-Vitamins: I also think using some sort of a multi-vitamin helps you get those vitamins you might not be getting withing your daily diet.

Water: You have to drink a lot of water to flush out your system. I have a friend who says water is like a natural steroid. The benefits of being properly hydrated are definitely underestimated.

There are plenty of other products that could be used to get the most out your workouts but that is the basics I typically follow. I also purchase most of my supplements from Bodybuilders.com. It's a good resource for training and diet tips. I do not buy things from GNC. That is highway robbery.

2) Training
I stick with 4 sets of 6-10 reps. I switch up every 4 weeks or so to concentrate on the fast and slow twitch muscles as well. A heavy week would be 5 sets of 5 reps. A light week would be 3 sets of 8-12 reps.

It is important to give your muscles time to heal between days. Rest is what makes your muscles bigger, or more toned. My general schedule would follow:

Mon: Chest, Triceps
Tue: Back, Biceps, Traps
Wed: Legs
Thu: Shoulders
Fri: Arms, Traps,

It's important to warm up first. If you want to do cardio the same day you lift then do it post weight training.

If you are trying to lose weight, the best time to do cardio is right when you wake up, before you eat. It burns the fat vs the carbs, making it more efficient. Here is a good article on why. Sometimes running in the morning can be hard to do with the weather and winter season. I just purchased a stationary bike from craigslist for 80 bucks. I can fit it in my closet. I'd like to get toned up so my plan is to do 30 min of cardio when I wake up, do some abs, then eat a huge breakfast.

3) Rest
Your rest is the third, and equally important part of the puzzle. Your muscles don't grow in the gym, they grown when your sleeping. This means give your muscles time to recoup. Don't work your chest on Monday, then on Wednesday because you want a stronger bench. You have to give your muscles time to heal.

It is at night, when you are sleeping that your body heals itself. Lifting hard in the gym, giving yourself enough nutrients and then sleeping so your body can grow is the full cycle of the process.

Consistency will get you where you want to be. Taking it day by day, and making no excuse to miss the gym is how you start seeing real results. Every so often I need a boost of motivation and I'll flip through a fitness magazine or watch a video of Arnold back in the day. I come across a lot of Animal Supplement ads that are really motivating and every so often I will cut them out and hang them on my mirror. Do whatever it takes. It the discipline will pay off.

Girls on the side

2010-02-26T14:49:00.000-08:00

In one of my previous posts before my hiatus I discussed how to pick up girls while out with a girl. Doug reminded me that I mentioned writing a post about how to maintain girls on the side while with a girl. Roosh covered a very similar subject on how to cheat without getting caught. He covered a lot of the points I had in mind, so it's worth the read.

It is my general consensus that it is much easier to be emotionally detached and painfully blunt with women in order to date the max capacity of women at one time. Four to five at any given time has been my optimal number. It's a win, win situation for everyone. I like to think it's a process I have become quite proficient at.

You may find yourself someday dating a girl...but being the animal that you are and embracing the natural tendencies of all human beings, you still want to make sweet, sweaty, dirty, hardcore love to other beautiful women. Although you care for this girl and treat her well, you still need to fuck. I say go ahead, this is the no judgment zone...it's probably better for the relationship anyways, that is if you don't get caught.

If you are whipped, and your gf wears the pants, you will never be able to pull this off and it's your own fault. The first step is setting up expectations. Your gf must know you are busy and that you have priorities that supersede her wants. You don't ever want her to feel entitled to ask you where you were the night before, especially in an investigatory manner. This means not talking on the phone as much, not answering every single question she has for you and setting boundaries as to what you allow her to do. A girl knows that even trying to take a glimpse at my phone would be grounds for some sort of repercussion.

Once you set that standard for the girl you're dating, this will give you the free time during the week to go out and do your thing without having to make any late night check in calls. If you don't have the upper hand in your relationship, you will probably crumble under the pressure, so that is a prerequisite. Next is setting the standard for those girls your meeting on the side. Most of the rules should follow the same standard as setting up any other casual relationship.

When you meet these girls on the side and take them out, it is imperative that they know they are not even on your list of priorities. You should pick and choose these girls wisely. There are jealous girls out there that would do everything in her power to ruin your situation. So you must protect yourself and cover your bases.

Let's think backwards. How could we possibly get caught in any worse case scenario:

-Phone
-Internet (Facebook, Myspace etc.)
-Physical evidence (hair, backs of earrings, hair elastics)
-Actual confrontation (She sees you at the bar)
-6 degrees of separation (Girls knowing the girl your dating in some way)

Phone: First line of defense is to set the expectation as mentioned above. Don't let your girlfriend feel comfortable even looking in the direction of your phone. Just in case she ever breaks rank and does look, you could lock your phone with a password and delete any incriminating evidence (texts) as they come in. Ringer off.

Internet: Facebook, Myspace, Dating sites....all of these are breeding grounds for social networking = incriminating evidence. Does this mean you need to completely erase your Facebook account? No, don't be foolish. Here is a few ways to handle this:
- Tell girls you don't have Facebook. This may not deter them from looking. The next day you may find a friend request sitting in your little notifications. Something that I like to do when I travel is to make up a fake name. This will help in other facets of being undetected as well. I have never received a friend request from a girl who is looking for the wrong name. This just take a bit of self discipline and awareness. You can't become complacent, which makes it a little more exciting as well. Remember, you're goal is to not get caught by your girlfriend, so you an take plenty more risks with your casual relationship. Sometimes sabotage is necessary. It does throw you off a bit when you are in the middle of fucking and she yells out a strange name, but you'll start identifying with it the more you do it.

Physical Evidence: Girls will intentionally leave evidence at your place. Your girlfriend, your casual partners, they will all feel slightly territorial and will carelessly leave things behind. Hair elastics, mini clips, backs of earrings. This stuff is easy to find. You must NOT just casually look when searching for evidence. A girl will find another girl's strand of hair anywhere!

The best way to avoid this would be to fuck at her place. If that is not possible then try to fuck her on the couch in your living room. It is easier to dismiss a piece of hair on the couch than on your pillow. Finally, make sure you do a clean sweep.

Actual Confrontation: I would handle this two ways on the wider scope of things. First off, pick girls up from other areas rather than where your gf lives. This sounds obvious, but can make life much easier. I live between Boston and Providence. If I am dating a girl in Boston, then I should be picking up girls in Providence. Secondly, try to avoid going out. This is two fold. I don't spend much money on dates. I prefer to pick up a bottle of wine and just go to a girl's house. Now I am not spending money all night and I am not in any dangerous territory by hanging out where my gf could potentially see me.

6 Degrees of Separation: When you hang out with this girl....hang out with her and no one else. This goes hand and hand with the bullet point above. You don't want to bump into your gf, but you don't want to bump into anyone else either. Don't meet her friends, don't introduce her to your friends, don't take her on double dates. It should always just be you and her.

One final and very important part of the equation is that you must fuck them good. This is the hook and sinker as far as keeping them around. Soon they will realize that you are their sex partner and won't expect an entire night out. They will also put up with you not calling them for a month or two at a time. Mid day quickies when convenient become frequent.

Always stay cool, always stay calm and never lose the upper hand. Here is a little secret. If you don't ever apologize for what you do wrong and don't get mad as part of your defense...the chances are she will apologize for over reacting.

Decisions

2010-02-25T09:57:00.000-08:00

Today's post is about making decisions and being assertive. I thought about this subject while sitting at lunch at a random restaurant out in NY. I sat at the bar to have some lunch. A couple walked in and the bar had about an 80% occupancy rate. There were two open stools around the corner to my left. They sat down, ordered their drinks and opened the menu. The couple wanted to share a few appetizers. This type of decision is simple, low stress and not very time sensitive. The conversation went something along the lines of:

M: Do you want to split some appetizers?
W: Yea that sounds good.
M: Alright do you want crab cakes or nachos? Or maybe some of these wings?
W: Umm.. I don't know.
M: Do you like crab cakes? They have chicken quesadillas too if you like those...
W: Yea, I like all of those. I'll have whatever you want...

Waitress comes over, "Did you decide on anything?"

M: No we are still looking.
M: So what do you want hunnie....

Do you see where he is going wrong here? He is not making any decisions. He is trying to place the decision making process in his girlfriend's hands. I'm sure he is doing this because he wants to make sure he makes the right choice, and picks something that she likes. I could hear the frustration in his voice after asking her three times what she liked. Then I could see her discomfort in making the decision on what appetizer to order.

Imagine this on a first date. You're talking to a girl on the phone, trying to figure out where to go, when to meet and if you should just meet there. Then after a long and pointless discussion you pick a restaurant. Then at the restaurant neither of you can decide if you want to get a bottle of wine or individual drinks. Things could potentially get awkward when no one can make a decision...

Bottom line, indecisiveness is bad, being an assertive decision maker is good. This doesn't mean you have to be a dictator, but give your suggestion instead of just a suggestion. Most women will tell you if they don't want something...and it's okay to be flexible.

"I really like the crab cakes here, would you like to split them?"

Now she is just answering a simple yes or no question. When you are taking a girl out for the first time, rather than asking here where she would like to go, just throw out a suggestion:

"I really like that new wine and tappas bar downtown, I was thinking of going there around 8:30 or so..."

Most of the time they just reply with, yea that sounds good...then I follow up with,

"Alright I'll pick you up around 8:30, I'll give you a text tomorrow before I head over."

The situation is less stressful now because she doesn't have to decide where to go, when to go, how to get there...you have answered all of these pending questions in two sentences. Crisis diverted. Whenever I used to discuss where to go with a girl, we would always decide on some lame restaurant or bar that was a "safe" decision instead of a place I would have preferred to go to. Now, even if I am going to her area for drinks, to a place I am unfamiliar with, I will look online and find a place. I found I still pick better places than when I leave it in most girls' hands.

Very often you might be facing a decision that has very minimal bearing on you, and you could care less what the outcome is. Let's say you're driving somewhere with one of your girlfriends, and there are two separate ways to get there. Both ways would have the exact same arrival time, and neither one has superior road quality or scenery. It is completely indifferent to you which road is taken. Well a woman will ask the question "What road do I take?" Don't explain to her the similarities of road A and road B...just pick any road, for no particular reason and tell her, "Take road A." End of discussion.

This assertiveness will translate to other areas of the relationship. At the end of the night, it's getting late and you go back to your place. The girl gets into her pajamas, brushes her teeth and gets ready for bed. You are patiently waiting for her to come into the bedroom and seduce you. As you're waiting, she comes in, sneaks under the covers and rolls over to go to sleep. Now what do you do?

She wants to have sex. Often, if this is a new relationship, she will hold off and let you initiate because she doesn't want to seem like a slut. Even if you have had sex once or twice before, this is still your responsibility. Get her turned on and ease your way into it. If you are ever laying in bed and your just waiting for things to magically escalate, here is a good way to initiate. Lightly grab her by the back of her hair and start kissing her neck. That should be enough to start things off...You should be able to gauge if she wants to fuck or not at this point. Sometimes you will have to deal with some LMR but there are strategies for that.

In closing, making decisions from start to finish and being congruent with that assertiveness is the difference between a man and a boy. Even if you don't feel like you can confidently make all of the decisions, do it anyways. Fake it until you make it. You will find that it has a better outcome than being overly polite.

The Switch

2010-02-22T06:31:00.000-08:00

Lately I have been traveling quite a bit. Two months will go by, I look back and I've only been home one or two weeks. It can be inconvenient when you have laundry to do, and mail to sift through, but mainly everything about traveling I love. Sitting in the airports having a drink here and there. Layovers, delayed flights, rental cars, hotels, random conversations...these are the things that I like about traveling.

It is my second night in this town and I am at the hotel bar having a drink, post dinner. I am there with my two new friends that I just met. I am talking to the bar tender, asking her where to go on a Tuesday night. There are not many places to go, and Tuesdays aren't typically the best nights to find a lot of people out. Although this is true, I never let this deter me. I think during the week has a lot of opportunity. One of my theories is that you only need one girl to make your night. You don't need a pool of 30 women at a bar to find a one single girl...sometimes you can do it at a local bar on a Tuesday night, with only 3 girls in the bar.

After the drink, we head to The Watering Hole, suggested by the bar tender. She was getting off work in another hour or two, so I suggested she swings by for a drink later. We drive to this bar and it is hillbilly like, smokey with pool tables and a pathetic set up for kareokee. I ordered a Budwiser and got some quarters for pool. The bar stools were lined up with scruffy coal mine workers and large women. No one looks healthy. The guys are thin with blood shot eyes and the women are large. Everyone smokes. Everyone drinks. I am out to have a good time not necessarily to pick up women, so this scene doesn't upset me at all. It's much different that Boston, and I like that.

As they are setting up the kareokee, a couple walks in. A blond girl and a skinny guy wearing worn out clothes and a dirty hat. After ordering drinks, they set up at the pool table next to us. As I walk to the bar, the blond girl and I cross paths. When I walk by, I look right at her, smile and assertively say Hi...and then keep walking to the bar.

As we play pool I keep catching looks from this blond girl and I confirm by my observations that they are not actually a couple. Most likely they are friends, this guy would like to bang her at the end of the night after they are drunk, but he doesn't have the balls to set that up from the get go. His strategy is to just hang out, drink, be passive and hope she goes for it when she is drunk.

We start making small conversation, commenting back and fourth to each other. Sometimes I feel like an ass hole when I am on the breach of potentially stealing a girl away from a guy. Then I think how he would probably fuck it up anyways and it would be a waste not to go for it. I then engage in conversation with both the blond girl and the guy. Both are rather friendly, and the blond girl calls herself Louisianan. Turns out they are "just friends." What luck! The one girl I need could be right here. So I play a game of pool with her.

Then the bar tender from the hotel walks in. The bar tender knew my name since I have visited a few times. She walked in, said hi to me, then said hi to Louisianan. It's a small town and I should have known they probably knew each other. Then it dawns on me that the bar tender knew my real name, and I gave Louisianan a fake name. I usually give the same fake name when I go out, especially when I travel because my real name is original enough that people seem to always, always find me on facebook. Even if I tell them I don't have facebook, they still look. When I give my fake common name, they never find me. Also, there is something fun about completely lying to a girl about everything. Every so often a girl will look at my dog tags or something when I am in the bathroom and find out my real identity, and I just tell them my whole life is a lie. I almost want them to find out on their own. It is funny. They get mad, but they always seem to find it a bit intriguing.

Fast forward to the end of the night. We got some food after the bar. I didn't want to, but it turned into an endurance game. Louisianan had a boyfriend and the town was really small. Her boyfriend happened to be traveling. Louisianan wouldn't come back to my hotel and she left the restaurant. She was afraid of getting caught and word getting back. The bartender offered to give me a ride home, so I took her up on the offer.

I jump in the piece of shit car the bar tender owned and we left the restaurant. We pull up to a convient store. Louisianan was inside and her car was parked next to ours.

"Do you want anything?" asks the bar tender as she gets out of the car....
"No thanks, I'll wait here"

Two minutes pass and Louisianan walks outside and sees me in the car next to hers. I roll down my window as she gets in her car. She rolls down her window and I throw my extra room key at her.

"Come over in 15 minutes, I'll have her drop me off. Come through the back no one will see you."

"I can't...I'll get in trouble."

"How? No one will know" I am having trouble understanding how she could possibly get caught if she snuck in with my key.

"Just come with me to my house..."

"What? When?..." I ask in confusion because she can't think this is more stealth than sneaking into my room.

"Right now."

"As in, leave Tricia in the store and just jump in your car now?"

"Yes."

I think about this. I think about how she went into the store for 3 minutes, and when she returns I will have vanished into thin air. To think you are definitely getting laid tonight, make one quick pit stop, and then you come back and your chance to fuck has flat out left. That would be devastating. But then I think, what do I owe her, and how often am I really ever going to see these girls again. Then I swiftly jump out, run over to the car's passenger side, jump in and I tell her to go!

I can't help but laugh, and I ask her....how could you possibly think this is not more obvious than just coming over when no one knows? Her logic seems a bit of kilter but oh well. While we drive to her small, untidy apartment, she feels obligated to tell me how much of a good guy her boyfriend is. I don't understand this logic either, but I don't bother trying to figure it out. Then I got a text from Tricia, "Where the fuck did you go?" I responded, "Went to bed, goodnight." The response didn't matter. I'm not fixing or mending anything here, it was just a response for the sake of a response.

We get to her house, I jump into bed in my boxers. Her bed was a mattress and box spring on the floor. What a fucking dump. As soon as she gets into bed we start fucking. I fucked her so hard that half of her body was off of the bed, on the floor, scrunched up against the wall. She was thin with long blond hair and a big ass. That's my favorite.

Normally switching girls can be difficult and end up as a fruitless attempt. Louisianan had no morals or logic which helped in this case. I just wish her house was a bit cleaner....that shit always bothers me.

Finally Back...

2010-02-18T13:54:00.000-08:00

What's going on....So I have been out of the loop for quite some time now. A lot of things going on. I am moving again which is a pain in the ass, but going to a 1 bedroom and I will finally have internet in my apartment. The last few months I haven't had internet and it obviously hurt my blog.

I have been traveling a lot, going to different parts of the U.S. I have a bank of stories I'd like to share, mainly comprised of meeting random women on the road and other debauchery. I have also read the book 4-hour work week and so I am trying to devise a plan to retire by 30 in the Philippines. This working shit just takes up too much of my time. I'm too smart to work.

I have a story I want to tell you, but it is a bit long and should have its own post rather than combining it with my entry back into the blog world here. Instead I will tell a short story about last night. Very short, right to the point.

Last night I was in my old apartment, trying to sell everything I own on Craigslist. I think Craigslist has a strange sexual vibe to it, even when you are selling stuff. I showed this older woman my full size bed that I am selling and I felt a sexual tension....as in I could have been completely forward with her and fucked her right then and there. Unfortunately I didn't find her very attractive, but her comments had sexual undertones. After she bought my coffee table and reluctantly left, I was instantly horny and wanted to fuck someone.

I texted a girl I knew in the area, that I hadn't talked to in about 2 months. I just said, Hey, what's going on? She responds saying she just got out of yoga and was going to take a hot shower, and then asked what I was up to. I told her I wanted to go over.

I go over there around 9:15 and we were going to a bar up the street. She works for Harpoon Beer company and gets a lot of cool perks for working there. I like girls that also offer perks to dating them along with good bj's and anal sex. She looked better than I remembered since she just got back from vacation and her skin was tan and her hair was blonder. I liked her librarian glasses but her voice is raspy. She thinks I'm funny but it gets annoying.

We walk into this bar and she knows all the bartenders and bouncers. I think she brought me here to show off how cool she was, but I don't think she is that cool. I drank 4 pints of beer and she had 3 pints of beer and 2 ciders. She said she had a glass of wine as well. She didn't seem drunk, but she did become a bit more annoying. After we finished, the bill came and I stood up and went to the bathroom, then we left.

We get to her apartment and we just go right to her room. I fucked this girl before so she knows what the deal is. As soon as we walk in, she takes her pants off and starts walking around in her lacey underwear. I get my shit together for tomorrow, hang up my clothes and everything and then I strip down and get ready for bed. I walk over to her as she is lying on the bed, I grab a fist full of her hair and start kissing her a bit. I have been wanting to fuck ever since that ugly craigslist lady left so I was ready to go. Not every girl tells me that it's the best or roughest sex they have ever had, but it's nice to hear it when they do. So up until this point, the girl has done alright as far as my expectations.

Once I finish, she got up to get some water and I instantly fell asleep. I wake up at 4 am and the left side of my body is kind of cold, kind of wet. As I wake up a bit more, I move away and take a second look. This girl pissed the fucking bed. It was disgusting. I packed my shit up, jumped in the shower and left. Before I left, I wrote her a note. "Dear xxx, Last night was fun, thanks for the beers...I had to leave early because it seemed you wet the bed. Tyler"

Welcome to 3rd grade. I imagine she must have been slightly embarrassed, I haven't talked to her today.

Picking up girls while on dates

2010-01-12T16:02:00.000-08:00

Is it possible to pick up girls while on a date with another girl? How creative can you get? What do you do when you feel the heat of the girl you are with...can you play it cool enough? I am addicted to making sweet love with as many women as possible. I live by the rules of reckless abandonment. Maybe someday I will reanalyze and find that being cautious will be more beneficial, but there are too many girls to waste time worrying about one.

At a dive bar with a few friends and a lady. I made eye contact with the table of 3 hipster type girls in the corner. One walks by and I held the eye contact until she broke it. My stomach started to get butterflies with excitement. But HOW could I start hitting on these girls while in the presence of another beautiful woman? Was it possible? I knew the fact that I was with a girl made those girls just that much more attracted to me. The quick looks and smiles while I held the hand of another woman.

The girl I was with went to the bar just a few feet away to cash out her tab. I pulled a napkin from an empty table next to the pool table and wrote down my name and number. As my girl came back, I crumbled up the napkin as if I just used it. She came over to my left and we start to walk out, passing the table of girls also on my left. As we walk past, I throw the napkin with my right hand behind my back onto the table. I could hear them laughing. I know they saw me writing on it and knew it was some form of communication. Just minutes later I get a phone call from a random number. Of course I answer. Now it's a test of how calm, cool and collected I could be be. It's a subtle adrenaline rush.

Another scenario. You're at a packed bar and you know you fucking look good. Whenever you have a girl on your arm you feel like you could pick up any girl in the bar. One trick to picking up girls while you are with a girl is let her get drunk and then you can do whatever you want. If she isn't wasted then you have to be more stealth like. On your way to the bathroom make a quick love connection with a girl. It's fine if the girl you are with sees you talking to other women. If the girl you are talking to on the trip to the bathroom knows you have a gf, or are with a girl, she will be more enticed to try and steal you away...especially if it is secretly. Pick out a good place in the bar and tell her to write down her phone number and hide it in that designated spot. If you make your way back to your girl and she says "Why were you talking to that girl?" Look her dead in they eye with a cocky smile and tell her "I do what I want" Yea they might get a little mad, but I promise you can still fuck them at the end of the night. Before you leave the bar, stop by your spot and pick up your phone number. It's similar to catching lobsters.

The most ideal situation is if you are out with one of your favorite bisexual girlfriends. Now you can employ the same "sneaky" behavior and let the girl you meet at the bar think you are up to something. What you should be doing is finding a girl for a wild threesome. The only way to do this is to be completely blunt. The best way I have found to word this would be, "You seem like a pretty wild, almost free spirited girl..." Say this whether you think she is the most wholesome girl in the world or the biggest slut in the bar. Reassess after she answers. If she says something like..."Why would you say that?" or even more forward, "Yea maybe I am.." then there is a chance. Then you can start explaining how your gf is looking for a fun wild girl etc. Some might say this is a complete shot in the dark, but those guys haven't had as many threesome's as I have. I will admit the chances are not necessarily high, but porno style nights don't just fall in your lap. You need to make it happen.

Next I will explain how to maintain girls on the side while dating a girl....

Simplify First

2009-12-29T06:49:00.000-08:00

I remember when I began reading pick-up books and tried to digesting all of the information. It's a lot. I would be talking to a girl and thinking about where I am in this Mystery M3 model. Am I still in Attraction or have I shifted into the Comfort stages yet? I would analyze everything she said and try to decipher if it was some sort of a test. I would paralyze myself mid conversation in fear of doing the wrong thing.

I had to take things down a notch, down to a more basic level before I started making progress. Who cares about comfort, lets get through a few good openers. Then what? Do I have a good story to follow up with, something to talk about? Or any fun assumptions to stimulate more conversation? Those are the things that take you past that stalling period in the conversation. Once I could work myself into an actual conversation I practiced different ways to close. This happened over a period of 2 years. Just like anything when you don't practice you get a little rusty. Now when I look back at the M3 model, it's not so overwhelming. I know what it's like to build attraction. I know how to throw out some bait and I'm not racking my brain for the next thing to say.

Some advice for someone starting off would be to concentrate on making the conversation last as long as possible. Learn how to change subjects to something you want to talk about. I like talking about travel, wine, country music or cooking.

I will ask a girl if she has ever lived outside of the country. I found that it is easy to stimulate a lot of connecting conversation through talk of travel.

I ask about wine because I like wine. I also like to know what they drink so I can have a bottle of it when they come over for the first date. (I always have wine at home)

Girls that like country music love guys that also do, so I just ask this to build that "connection" that she is feeling.

I ask about cooking because I think it is important that a woman knows how to cook. Even a girl that only has one single spaghetti dish will tell you she knows how to cook.

Negs are dangerous. Even for me. Negs are effective when they are seemingly unintentional. The idea is that you want a girl to think you are not interested. Often when you try to act out a neg, you can cross the line of insulting. You don't want to go around insulting the shit out of girls and thinking you're dropping some great negs because they are all pissed off. Last time I fucked up a neg was when I opened the only girl in the bar and after a few minutes of talking I indirectly called her old. She got a little upset. Perhaps I should have toned that one down a bit, but I don't back pedal. Apologizing and telling her I was kidding would be too degrading. I just let her take the insult.

Good thing there are so many girls in this world for me to practice on....

Christmas Sweater

2009-12-24T07:20:00.000-08:00

Here are some holiday jokes for you to use to really impress the girls...

Why was Santa's helper depressed?
He had low elf-esteem!

Why are Prancer and Dancer always on coffee breaks?
They are Santa's star bucks!

What do they have to do before they can put tickle me Elmo on the shelves?
Give him to test tickles.....just to make sure he works...

Combine these jokes with the most festive Christmas sweater and you will be an unstoppable force!

Last Tuesday a girl who I met the week before was sending me text messages. She was evasively telling me she wasn't up to much that night, just hanging out and drinking wine. I still had some Christmas shopping to do so I told her if she was going to be up for a while, maybe I'd stop by for a glass of wine. I told her I had a lot of things to do before the next day, but she could help me if she wanted. Of course she wanted to help.

I went to Walmart and bought a red sweatshirt and some paint pens. Then I found some bells and glue. I may have spent a total of 12 dollars. I also had to wrap my secret santa gift for work. After I went to the mall I headed over this girl's house around 10. I love going to the mall during the holiday season. People hate it because it's so busy, but that's why I love it.

I arrive at her house around 10. I bring in all of my stuff, my Walmart bags, my secret santa gift that I have to wrap, and my travel bag. If you read my blog, you know that I always have a bag in my Jeep so that I am prepared for a night or two away from home at any given time.

She poured me a glass of wine and I filled her in on the events planned for the evening. I pulled out my blank red sweater and told her we were going to make it into something awesome!

She asked, "Are you having an ugly sweater day at work or something?"

"No."

"So you're going to be the only one?"

"The only one that I know of."

In short, I drew a big Christmas Tree and sewed bells all over the shirt. Then we wrapped my present which was fairly creative in nature as well. It was fun. She had more fun doing this than going to dinner or a bar. It was also funny because I was doing it for no real reason. This girl is a yoga freak. I was pleasantly surprised when I took off her clothes at how tight her body was. A nice, thick but firm ass, and she liked it fairly rough. That is right up my ally. Bravo.

I wore this sweatshirt to work the next day and it was a big hit. I kept it on for the remainder of the day. Girls were approaching me, opening me at every glance. I would tell them how I made it myself. You should be taking advantage of the holidays to rack up some phone numbers! Conversations are especially easy this time of year. Be creative....

Sex Panther

2009-12-21T08:25:00.000-08:00

Two of my closest friends have birthdays just a few days apart. I suppose this warrants a Thursday night out until 4 am. Wanting to get some dinner first, we head to the bar relatively early. We ordered some shit food and a few drinks. The place was scarcely filled with women but it was early.

After we finished up eating we hung out at the bar for a bit. The 80's cover band just started rocking out on the other side of the bar. Behind us sat a table of attractive cougars. The dark haired girl came over to order a round of drinks. She was standing next to me, leaning over the vacant seat to my right. I looked briefly and confirmed that she was attractive. Dark features. Long brown hair done up for the night out and really dark eyes. After the initial glance I asked what she was ordering. We start looking at the drink specials. She asks if I would like to take a shot with her. She invited her friends over and invited my friends to join in a shot. This is when the two groups merged and the name exchanges took place.

These girls were all single and in their late 30's. If I were to guess, I would say all of these girls lived through the characters of Sex in the City. Most of them were attractive but some of their personalities were lacking. Each girl migrated towards each of my friends. Some of the women bouncing back and fourth to and from each of us. The girl I talked to the most was the girl who initially approached the bar. She seemed to have a decent body. I don't prefer older women but they can have their perks. They often have their own place. They can handle casual relationships with younger guys for a decent span of time and they can pay for their own shit (and yours).

At first she began badgering me because I was so much younger than her. This is an attempt to gain the upper hand but it would never work. When faced with this shit test, you should never attempt to qualify yourself. Don't tell her you're mature for your age. Don't tell her you have dated older women in the past. Truth be told, she should be a bit uncomfortable with being older. Women naturally will try to turn their insecurities into your problem. On any other given night I could be out banging a tight little 19 or 20 year old. She should feel insecure about it. People can give you advice about how to respond to a million different shit tests. I have a standard response for most of them...not responding at all. I flat out ignore the statement even if it was a direct question. I don't respond to such nonsense.

After ignoring dumb questions like when I graduated high school, or if I knew the 80's song being played she made a comment about the football game on TV. I looked up and told her I don't really follow sports. At this point the tables were turning and she is starting to qualify herself to me now. "Yea I don't really watch sports much either." Then I tell her how I don't really watch TV in general. In my apartment I don't have cable or internet. I prefer to do better things with my time. She explains how she doesn't watch that much TV either. She is trying to fit the mold of a girl I might find attractive. We start talking about work. The conversation always moves to work...always. Before I answer I tell her how in other parts of the world, if you ask someone "What do you do?" they wouldn't understand what you were asking. Only in these westernized countries does that question even apply. I could see the conversation transform. She started off playfully trying to bash my age and write me off and after 20 minutes she was invested in the conversation. We exchanged some good stories and if I had more time I would probably hang out with this girl. I excuse myself to the dance floor, as the bar began to fill up.

While out on the dance floor, a girl a little on the drunk side basically walked right into me. I tell her to watch where she is going and we start talking. For some reason she thinks I am much younger than her. I ask her how old she is...25 she exclaims. Although I am older than her I tell her she is too old for me.

"What! How old are you?" she asks.
"Well I'm 19....I have my brother's ID so I can get into bars."
"Oh my god, you're way too young!"

Then I agree that she is too old and I walk back to the dance floor. Shortly after she finds me again. She works for Harpoon and they are having some sort of an event there. She asked if I wanted a beer so I said sure. We move to the room with tables and she pulls out a roll of orange raffle tickets hidden in this little cabinet against the wall. For the rest of the night she bought my drinks with her little tickets.

She kept commenting that she couldn't believe I was so young. I got the feeling that it actually made her more attracted to me. I decided to hold off even longer on telling her that I was actually older than her. At one point she pulled out her phone and said she wanted to get my phone number. I took her phone and typed in Sex Panther. Her friend was off on her own making out with my good friend B. After dancing around for a while we decided to check out a different bar. My third friend was meeting a girl there and so we invited the two girls we had been dancing with. We all jump in one vehicle and head over.

This bar was much fancier. The three of us split up as soon as we got there. I took my girl to the bar and we relaxed. Leaning along the bar we conversed. I saw B over to the left with her friend, and my other friend was off to the right with his respective girl. After talking and having a single drink, we decided that the best plan of action was to leave after our drink, and take a cab to her apartment. We grabbed out coats and I told my friends I'd see them tomorrow. We have a pact that, in the morning, no matter what time it is or how far the distance, we will pick each other up. Sometimes I get a call at 4 am, sometimes at 7. The rule is that we don't ever get stuck at a girl's house longer than we need to be.

We take a cab to her house. As we climb the stairs she digs for her keys and then opts to just bang on the door. "I hope my roommate is home!" A scruffy, sleepy eyed guy opens the door. We don't care to meet each other, he just looks at her and says "whatever..." then goes back to his room. We walk in and go directly to her room. There really isn't any skillful wording or careful treading here....I just go into her room and we get down to business. My goal was to softly and preciously fuck the shit out of her. Being a one night stand, I thought she could take it but she was a little tighter than I expected. I hate when this happens. I did what it took and finished, and then instantly fell asleep.

I knew to set my alarm at 6:00 to begin my day, in order to get to work on time. I'm not sure what time I actually fell asleep, but when I woke up I knew it was time to go. I woke her up by pulling her arm until she fell on the floor. When she was crawling back up to her bed, she asked me why I was getting up so early. "I have work!" Why do you work on Saturdays? she asked. "It's actually Friday..." That is the kind of night we had. I felt fine. She drove me to my car, I told her I was 27 and that my birth name was actually Sex Panther and we parted ways. I may or may not see her again.

Vieques Puerto Rico

2009-12-03T17:19:00.000-08:00

I am off to Vieques Puerto Rico tomorrow morning. Vieques is this tiny Island right off of Puerto Rico's main land. I have to take a tiny puddle jumper plane from San Juan to get there. I'm going with a young lady. Her family owns this house on the beach out there and there is no television, no internet and hopefully no phone service. The only thing they have is hammocks and surfboards. Have a great weekend everybody. I will try to forget about the mountain of work I am coming home to on Thursday for just a short while....

Bedroom Transition

2009-12-02T06:40:00.000-08:00

Sometimes when I write about a night out or a lay, I speak general terms. Typically when I get emails, I try to give a solid response. The questions are more specific and the answer is catered towards that individual. I figured for today's blog I'd respond to TC's email and post it here.

"Hi Tyler.

My name is TC, I am a softmore at the University of Miami. Your blog has helped me a lot. I have had more action in the last 2 months than in the previous 19 years of my life. Thanks, you don't understand how much you are changing me. I have changed my life. I feel like I never have had any control on how to meet the girls I was attracted to.

I wanted to send you a note, and ask you if you could talk on the blog, or email me, about a few things I don't know how to approach, and you really do not give much details on your chronicles.

I understand the concept of bringing the girl to your place, give her familiarity, change venues, create comfort, bring down the defenses and bounce back to your apartment. Brilliant.

The problem is that you usually do not talk about the actual part on how from a couple of glasses of wine at the couch, you end up in bed. How do you bring them to your room. what do you say. how do you pull the trigger??? when?? this baffles me. I keep fucking it up.

I am getting good a creating attraction and comfort. I do not know how to pull that damn trigger. cannot find the moment. Any help, would be greatly appreciate it, you are doing more for me than you imagine.. I hope you can spare a minute and help me complete the puzzle. you rock."

You mentioned "find the moment." Through out a date there will be a series of moments that you will have to pull the trigger. Bringing a girl into your bedroom and fucking her is a building process. You can't go from a great conversation, even if it's going well and then try to take her pants off. It's all about building that sexual tension. I will go through a typical date, and lay out some of those key moments. When I refer to pulling the trigger, it means doing the thing that might be slightly uncomfortable but if you succeed will escalate your sexual relationship.

A girl meets at your house and the plan is to go out to a bar:
-When you first meet up with her, give her a hug. The goal of the night is building kino (touching her). Building, pushing it through out the date so she becomes comfortable with it.
-If you're not close enough to walk then take a cab or you drive to the bar. Alcohol is a tool. You don't want her to get sloppy drunk but a few drinks will help your cause. If she drives it will give her an excuse not to drink. You should be in full control of the date and she is just along for the ride. She doesn't decide where you go or how you get there...

You drive to the first bar. This place is quiet. You want to be able to talk and "connect."
-When you park and you are walking to the bar, it might be too early to start holding hands...so stick out your arm for her to put her arm through. She will like the initiative you are taking to treat her like a woman, and she is becoming more comfortable being next to you.
-When you get to the bar/restaurant, don't sit at a table across from her. The table is a barrier between the both of you. There are a few places I like that have round booths. I like sitting there because we can sit close enough where we feel like we are next to each other rather than across from each other. The other option is sitting at the bar next to each other. This is where you build that comfort. Tell those stories that you know women love. Build kino while doing so. After 2 drinks head to a different bar. Have 3 drinks if things are going well.

Now you want to go to a place where you can start to dominate on that Kino.
-Pick a bar that you have the chance to dance, or at least stand up at. You don't need to sit the whole night. When you walk to the bar, put your arm around her or hold her hand. This is when you want to start pushing those limits and get her as comfortable around you as possible. This is the part of the date that will pay off when you try to make that transition from the couch to the bedroom.
-If you are sitting next to her, sit close. Your knees should be against each other and your hand should be on her knee/thigh. If you are standing you should be close to her. If there is music you should dance with her. By the 4th drink you both should be feeling good enough to not be shy. The kino should be shifting from being friendly to becoming sexual. Build the sexual tension.
-From here it is your call when to leave. Don't get too drunk and don't get her too drunk. I often don't try to kiss her just yet. I wait until I get back to the apartment. I can see why people might say to go for it, but I think it builds the tension a little more, and that is healthy.

Drive or take a cab back to your place
-By now you should be quite comfortable with this girl and her with you. She should want you to have your hand on her lap. When you get back to your place, pour a glass of wine. Turn on some music. I avoid the TV.
-If I haven't kissed her yet (even if I have) this is how I typically go about doing so. If she gets up to get a drink/restroom whatever, I get up to do something as well. I might check the stereo, look at cd's or get a drink. While she is standing I walk over and kiss her. I like kissing while standing up because I'm not crouched over, I can grab her hips, waist and ass and I don't feel crowded on the couch. If things are going well, bring her right into the bedroom. If you feel you need to build a little more tension then the other option is leave her wanting more and go sit back down on the couch. Talk a bit more and then start kissing again. This all depends on how hot and heavy you are getting into it.

What I mean by pull the trigger here is, don't make out for an hour on the couch. That shit is boring. She isn't going to take your pants off for you, sitting on the couch. Stand up, grab her by the hand and pull her into your bedroom. She will either follow you or she won't. The more comfort and kino you build, the more likely she will follow you. Once you go into the bedroom you should really be assuming you're going to fuck. Take your shirt off. Let her admire the work you have put in at the gym. Dim lights make you look more defined and makes her more comfortable being naked. Take her shirt off. Take her pants off. Fuck her hard. Your only goal is that you finish from fucking her pussy. If she cums, that's fine but you shouldn't care. Don't try and please her. At this point you are a caveman and you don't care about what makes her finish, how she likes it or if she can finish from fucking or just oral sex. The more concerned you are about making it good for her....the worse it is going to be for her. When you're done, just roll over and go to sleep, that's what I do.

Back out in Wyoming

2009-11-23T14:31:00.001-08:00

I have heard of books explaining game set for a college setting. The idea is to become popular and fit in with everyone. Once you become this "cool" person, you let the girls come to you. They explained that you shouldn't come on too strong at first, to try and avoid making a name for yourself. I have also recieved emails asking questions about what to do if you are at a bar with a girl, and other girls are there that you either want to date, or have dated in the past. "Is it bad to pay attention to other girls while you are currently at the bar with a girl?"

I think life is too short to play it safe. If your in college, try to make the biggest name for yourself. Make an attempt to sleep with every girl on that entire campus! If you leave college with a "name" then you probably did good for yourself. Waiting for girls to come to you is passive and weak. If you sleep with a girl one night, and the next night you have a chance to sleep with her roommate, then do it. Those four years go by fast...

When you're at a bar with a girl, you want to pay attention to other girls. You want that girl to feel a little sting of jealousy. Especially if you haven't slept with her yet, let her see other girls interested in you. Make her think there is a chance she might lose you to another girl, and watch her interest level sky rocket.

I have inherited the ability to not feel bad about doing what I want. This is why I suggest living with reckless abandonment and doing whatever you want at that moment. It may not always be the most strategic thing, but at least your going for what you want.

Last week I was out in Wyoming. I have been there a few times now, for 3-4 days at a time. I don't know if it is possible to sleep with an entire town, but I am trying. I didn't do this by just sticking with the sure shot.

I had been talking to this girl named Hidi. An adorable girl, short with dark hair and big green eyes. She was very nice, very fun and I enjoyed hanging out with her. We began a small relationship, in the sense that we would hang out here and there. Two Wyoming visits ago I fell in love with her. I always say I fall in love with girls, but to me it is a joking term. I use the word love to describe the feelings towards the current girl I like for that week. Then I fall in love with another girl and forget about the previous girl last week...

In this town in Wyoming, on Wednesday nights they have kareokee. The entire town shows up since it is one of the only places to go that night. I heard that a few of the girls I slept with in the past had moved to other places. This is an often occurrence in this little town. Everyone is coming and going.

Hudson and I head down to the bar and we meet up with Hidi and Mandy. The girl/guy ratio is not in our favor. I always say that the ratio doesn't matter because I only need one girl. Since Hidi is a local, she hangs out with us and makes her rounds talking to everyone else in the bar. I just woke up from a nap I took to prepare for the long hall and I was still waking up. I sit at the counter and drink my beer, as the people start to pour in. The dance floor is empty. Most people are sitting at tables. This is just how the night starts.

The girl DJing kareokee is the same girl who always does it. She is attractive, loud, fun, sexual and the most sought out after girl in the bar. As she is running around, our eyes meet. Now...I want her. How do you subtly hit on the girl conducting the events for the entire evening? As I sit there, Hidi is becoming less appealing and the DJ is becoming more. She is more of a challenge than the girl I have already won over. I instantly fall out of love with Hidi, and in love with the girl on stage.

This town has a population that matched the number of people in my high school. Of course they all know each other. A strategic plan would be to stick with Hidi, as she is a sure shot. She is attractive, she's into me and she is a definite. Going for another girl in this environment would potentially destroy any opportunity I may have. But that's not what I want.

Hudson wanted to request a song. The DJ came over and asked what song, and where he was from. Then she asked if I was singing anything and I told her I don't sing, I dance. She introduced herself as Cinnamon. Initially I thought this was probably her stage name, but the more I thought about this crazy place the more I believed that Cinnamon was most likely her birth name. She had a camera with her and had her friend take a group picture of Hudson, herself and me. As she looks at the picture, I lightly pull her by the arm and told her to take a picture of the both of us. She put her arm around me and her friend took another picture.

"How do I look?" I yell out.

"Good I'm sure." She replies with a little smile.

"I want to see it..."

She takes the camera, and as she is resting on my arm she shuffles through the pictures. She pulls up the one of us, and it was a good picture of both of us.

"We look good together..." and I throw a little wink her way.

By now the dance floor was picking up. I am not a great dancer by any means, but I can be an entertaining one for a small period of time. Up until this point, I had been relatively quiet. A few of the girls I knew wanted to pull me out to the dance floor and demonstrate my "pick-up move" that I always use. A small circle of people form, and as the routine goes, I explain to everyone how:

"In this scenario, I don't know any of those girls over there!" (I am yelling this to everyone)

I shake my hips a little, look over at the girls, turn away, and then look back as if I were taking a double take. Then I focus on one girl and slowly dance towards her. Right as I approach and she is looking at me, I lick my finger, place it on my ass, and quickly remove it as if it was very hot. I then look at the girl and back up while telling her "no" by shaking my finger. Essentially saying she can not have this...

Explaining it doesn't do it justice, but it is a routine I use and I always get a good response.

Everyone laughed and Cinnamon loved it...of course. I was the center of attention for those 2 or 3 minutes and it got the attention of the other women in the bar. Attractive or not, it's good to have their attention. I danced with a few more girls in more of a fun way than a sexual way. I would catch Cinnamon shooting me sexual stares from across the room. Later I slow danced with a girl, and as the song ended I passed the sexy DJ and told her the next slow song she would have to come find me before some other girl did.

Sure enough, she came and found me. We talked a little during our dance. She is a DJ by night, and a librarian by day. The good ole fashion librarian fantasy. It doesn't get better than that. I noticed a few semi dirty looks from the local guys there. She wants to hang out soon, so I tell her to give me her number. Instead of pulling out my phone, I told her to write it down and give it to me later. Next song she was up, singing with the mic. She walks over and hands me the paper mid performance. I suppose this wasn't the subtle number exchange I had in mind.

I danced with Hidi for a few songs. The night was nearing to an end. Cinnamon dragged me out to the dance floor a few more times and I wanted to fuck her. Her sexual energy turned me on. I eventually gave up trying to be subtle about it. Hidi presumably got upset. I was going to say bye after the bar was closing, but then I decided to just leave. I almost felt bad, but not quite.

Hidi sent me a few text messages. Every message I returned, she sent one immediately back. I hate text message conversations. Years ago I may have apologized for my insensitive behavior but I refrained. I knew nothing good would come from apologizing to a girl who I have no obligation to what so ever. After 3, I decide not to return any more messages. A few minutes pass and she begins apologizing to me, explaining that the guys she was talking to were just her friends, and she should have made it more clear. I just forgave have and fell asleep. I was not really upset but my lack of apology made her wonder if she did something wrong.

Unfortunately I will be in Wyoming over New Years. I'd prefer to be home, but I suppose I will just hang out with Cinnamon until I find someone else. I am only going back to Wyoming 2 more times. Knowing I will most likely never see any of these people again, there are no real repercussions. It give you a sense of invincibility...

Groundhog Day

2009-11-09T17:59:00.000-08:00

Friday night I went out with a few of the fellas. A friend of mine from the military moved here recently and went to high school here in MA for a little while, years ago. He was invited to a party in Cambridge so the plan was to stop by there and then hit the bars. I had never met any of his high school friends and didn't really know what to expect.

I stopped at a liquor store to grab some beers to bring to the party. There were four of us and I grabbed a 12 pack of PBR since I was only going to have a few. We show up at the party and there was nothing less than $40 bottles of wine everywhere. Every guy had a sweater vest on and every girl looked like they were primed and ready for wife and motherhood life. Not really the crowd I had expected but that's fine. Adapt and over come so they say. My friend introduced us to a few of the people at the party and we rather quickly drank our PBR's. After 30 minutes or so we made our way to the bar and had our friend meet up with us later.

We went to this bar that has potential but I never really liked the set up. There is no dance floor, the waitresses are constantly fighting to get through the crowds, and most of the standing room is very narrow.

Going into this night, I knew I was leaving Monday for New York, and then back out to Denver/Wyoming the following week. In the event that I get a phone number, that is over a two week period that I'd have to wait to see her again, which would most likely make that number go stale. Aside from that, I don't currently have the time to be going on dates with any new girls. If I fuck a girl, it is going to be tonight, one night stand, no phone numbers. For a while, I was just enjoying the company of my friends, enjoying the people watching, the analyzing of situations, and my beer.

My good friend Hudson was out with me that night, and the fire was in his eyes. It always is...I see this table full of girls in the corner, so I tell Hudson give me 20-30 seconds and come over...Then I open with one of my go to openers:

"Hey, when do they open up the dance floor here? There are some new moves I have been meaning to try out..."

"Haha, right here, this is the dance floor!"

"Great, moved these fucking tables out of my way, I need a lot of room!"

This conversation goes nearly the same way every time. Then I briefly tell them about Hudson and how he is the dancing master mind and he comes rolling in shortly after. Sometimes, depending on how I read the girl, I like to throw a cuss word into my opener to make it a little more edgy. If you do this, don't over do it. One "F" word is sufficient in this scenario. Hudson and I talk to these girls, the girl I liked was 21 and goes to UCONN. This is 2 hours away, which means she is staying with her friend, which means the chances of banging her are less than if I met a girl who has her own place right up the street. I flirt a little more and leave on decent terms. Hudson openes a two set. He left with them to another bar but made his way back. He has come a long way. I'm impressed with his ability to open...

Groundhog Day is one of my favorite movies. There are so many subtle jokes and moments in that movie. So Bill Murray does the same day over and over, he hits on this girl, his co-worker, day after day, over and over again. He does the same routines every single day until the date goes wrong and then the next day he does the same thing again and tweaks where he messed up the day before. One part I love is when he becomes frustrated with doing the same thing over and over and over and he tries rushing it. He rushes his lines, he rushes his actions because he is so tired of doing them and just wants to get through the bull shit. The girl, who essentially has never been through these actions, feels uneasy because this is not normal for her, and when he rushes through the lines she thinks he is crazy. It's hilarious. I felt like Groundhog Day, like Bill Murray, on Saturday.

I'm so used to building comfort, having the same conversations, qualifying girls, telling the same stories, closing the same ways that I just didn't feel like going through alllll of that bull shit just to fuck. I made an effort to try and rush through everything and just go home with someone. I have to laugh at this...

So I'm usually telling stories about how I banged this girl or that girl....this is a story of how I did not. I just got done talking to some mediocre blond girl. Getting a bit tired, I just lean up against the ledge on the wall, opposite of the bar. The walkways are narrow as I mentioned. There is a girl in a blue dress standing in a group. (2 guys, 2 girls) You might assume each guy was dating each girl...but through experience I know that is hardly ever the case. The girl in the blue had nice eyes, a decent face, but not a girl I'd take home to meet my mom.

As I am looking at this group, analyzing, she yawns. I speak up and I yell to her,

me: "Hey! What are you trying to do??"

her: "What?"

me: "Yawning! I'm trying to go out and have a good night and you're over here yawning! Do you know how contagious that is?? Do you know what you just could have potentially done? Everyone in the bar could have started yawning, then they all leave and it would have been all your fault!!"

I deliver the opener flawlessly. She responds as expected and is playful. We talk for 30 seconds or so and I can tell by her body language and the way she is looking at me that she is interested. The Bill Murray in me steps up and I rush through the boring comfort stage and I ask where she lives, then I bluntly invite myself over. Something along the lines of "Why don't we just get out of here and go back to your apartment and have a drink and relax!" Not really a question, it was more of a suggestion. I should have just went with the "shock and awe" move...

She was into me enough that I could have talked for 20 minutes and gotten her phone number, and a second date. I didn't build comfort, because I didn't want to and she didn't let me go over her house. She returned to her friends and the biggest guy in the group got rather loud. I think he was angry at my suggestion to her. Although he didn't say anything directly to me, I was secretly hoping his liquid courage would push him to do so. I had a Steven Seagul move I have been wanting to try and he was a lot taller and out weighed me by a good 60 lbs or more, so it would have been perfect.

Three blond girls walked into the bar. From what I noticed, they were the most attractive girls in the bar at the time. As I passed by, I started talking to the one that I thought was the cutest. Hudson was working his magic on her friend.. She asked where I worked, I wouldn't tell her. We started talking about traveling....bla bla bla, Groundhog Day...not even her attractiveness was keeping my attention. She is telling me how she traveled somewhere, and did something, and as she was telling me the story, I just leaned in and kissed her right on the lips. She was slightly in shock. She just stepped back and said, "What was that? Why did you just kiss me?" I didn't have a response since this isn't usually how it goes down. Sometimes a lack of response is the best response. I just shrugged, but I found it amusing how surprised she was. "You can't just go around kissing girls you don't know!" She didn't seem that happy. I just kind of laughed and said "I do whatever I want..."

She turned around to her male friend and said, "Hey, he just kissed me mid-sentence!" I didn't know who the guy was, he might have felt the need to defend his attractive friend, which would have given me the opportunity to try my Steven Seagul move, but instead he started laughing and looked at me and said, "That is awesome!"

I am confident that if I put in enough time, I probably could have pulled a number, and maybe even a real kiss close. I didn't build comfort. I felt bad because it may have ruined Hudson's chances with her friend. That was not my intention. I will admit, when she didn't respond positively to my random kiss, it sucked...but then 3 seconds later it was funny. I don't regret doing it. It would have been just another boring conversation instead of a slight adrenaline rushed kiss. I'll take the adrenaline rush any day.

Have a good weekend!

2009-11-06T14:36:00.001-08:00

It's Friday! Go find some new girls to prevent those dry spells. Approach enough girls and get at least 3 solid numbers in your phone...put in the time and effort now, and stop taking those girls out over the weekend! I'm heading to New York on Monday. I'm in the White Plains area, so if anyone has any suggestions, or knows a girl who knows a girl...let me know. Have a good weekend!

Getting What You Want

2009-11-02T11:39:00.000-08:00

Getting what you want out of a woman. It is a subject of control with very basic concepts.

Human nature is something that is predictable. If you're not using this to your advantage, you're foolish.

If I tell little Joey he can only play with the toys on the red mat, he is going to want to play with the toys on the blue mat.

If I am doing a painting estimate for someone, I tell them I only have one slot left in my summer schedule. They have to decide right now if they want me to paint or not, because I have other estimates to go to! I'm approved by others and this is a limited time offer.

If your boss or your teacher tells you good job after every single thing you do. Those "Good Job!" comments have a lot less intrinsic value since you get them for not even doing anything.

There are a million parallels in every day actions that correlate to game. The sales training seminars I went through years ago could be a dead on pick up training. From the cold calling, to the phone game, to the sale/date, to the closing. Human nature is predictable or else they wouldn't be able to train people on how to sell things.

Whenever a girl starts a sentence: "I want..." I interrupt and let her know..."I'll tell you what you want." They think I'm kidding, which is part of the joke. I really will tell her what she wants, without her even knowing it. To elaborate. Instead of telling a girl to iron my clothes while I'm in the shower...I would plant that seed of thought in her head and she would suggest it to me. My clothes would get ironed either way, but one way you are exposing your control by asking and the other runs below the surface. To them, it was something they thought of. You plant the seed and they suggest ironing:

me: "No, no, you don't have to iron my clothes, most girls don't iron guys shirts that well anyways! There is always weird creases."

girl: "I can do it, I'm good at it, I want to iron your shirt!'

Genius....but a girl who isn't chasing your approval will not care to iron your clothes.

A girl may THINK that she wants a dozen roses from a submissive guy. In actuality, she would be happier doing something for a more dominant guy and making HIM happy. Ironing clothes is a small token of appreciation. Think of all of the things you could have done for you, all for not being the kind of guy who buys a girl roses and cards:

-clean house
-free dinners and drinks
-Christmas gifts that you almost feel bad about accepting
-free gifts just because you mentioned you liked an item
-girls thanking YOU for sex

You have to have the right kind of alpha attitude to make this happen. You can't just have random acts of dominant male attributes, it is a package deal. It is a mindset. The more you think about it, the more you embrace this attitude, the more it will become your actual person.

Here is a few examples of things I do. This isn't for replication as much as understanding the mind frame:

At a party, my date was playing beer pong. Her team just lost and I happened to be behind to her (talking to a tall hot blond). She looks over and asks if I could refill their picture of beer. I half smirk as in, *not a chance* and she gives me the sad begging face. Some might fold at this sad puppy dog face, rationalizing that this is her submitting. The second I grab that picture, she'd high five her friend. Who is submitting to who in that scenario? So I just look at her and say I'm in the middle of a conversation. She got the beer...and learned a quick lesson on her control in this relationship.

I check out girls when I am with girls. If you are not doing this because of the fear of getting caught, she already has too much control over you. I want to get caught. I want her to see me. At first, girls are appalled and disapproving. They soon realize that their "punishment" has absolutely no effect on me. I am setting a standard here. Now girls laugh when they see me check out other girls...the same girls that tried to give me a dirty look the first time!

I always say limited phone use. When you are on the phone, always hang up first. Say bye, and hang up before she even finishes saying bye. You want her to hear the sound of silence, knowing you didn't wait for her to say bye back.

Be decisive all of the time. When she asks, "where do you want to eat?" this isn't a discussion. We are not trying to figure out a place that we can all agree on! Never respond, "I don't know, where do you want to eat?" Indecisive men are weak. Just think of a place you want to go, and tell her. Stop fucking around! (haha I'm getting pissed off)

Never....never apologize.

Have plans that trump plans with her. Dinner can wait until after the gym. Stopping at your buddy's house for 2 hours on the way to her house is fine. Do whatever you want.

Girls think that sex is their power over you. When you fuck enough, no girl has that power over you. And when you fuck hard enough, they will be thanking you for sex.

There is a line. A law of punishment and reward. You can't be controlled, but you have to have an ounce of compassion. You need to realize when rewards are most efficiently due, and you create the value of the rewards. It is basic human nature, and the more you understand and adopt these concepts the more you will reap the benefits. This is when you start telling girls how you like your house clean. Or when you ask them questions such as:

"do you think if I brought my shirt into the bathroom while I took a shower, the steam would get the wrinkles out?....Oh you'll iron it, thanks."

"Does that juke box take credit cards?"

"I really can't go out tonight...I'm trying to save up money for a trip to Italy."

"I don't think I'd have a threesome with you. I don't know if you'd be able to handle it. Some girls get really jealous and act a little crazy and I think it would bother you too much..."

Would any of these statements get an indecisive, submissive, rose giving, vagina worshiping beta male anything? No....but they get me the things I want without even asking for them. It was "their" idea. You're good when you pickup a girl, and she thinks she picked you up....Stay humble for the ace is in your pocket!

Broken Records and a New Shirt

2009-10-30T06:47:00.000-07:00

I hadn't really planned on posting anything today. I wrote something up for next week....but yesterday I broke a record. When I bang three girls in a 24 hr span of time, I refer to that as a trifecta. It's not something I really try and set out to do, but they happen. Usually if I wake up and have morning sex, there is a strong chance for a trifecta, depending if I have a threesome that night or just bang out two different girls.

So yesterday I broke a new record. Four girls in 24 hours. I always thought that if I ever wanted to get four in a day, I'd probably have to plan it out, but it was never something I really cared to do. The more you fuck, the less it matters, but this story is worth telling I suppose.

So the morning started off in a girl's bed, and I woke up ready to fuck. I did so in the shower, and still made it to work 15 minutes early. The work days seem much more productive after good morning sex.

I had planned to meet up with a girl from work that night. I was taking her to the wine and tapas bar that I refer to in a lot of my posts. I met her at Walmart because I had to find some stuff for Halloween. While I was there, I found this awesome orange flannel shirt for 7 bucks. Expensive clothes are a waste, I can make anything look good with flashy dance moves.

So V meets me at Walmart right as I am checking out. I drive her to this little bar I frequent. We walk in and head downstairs. As I pass by the bartender we shake hands and I tell him to let the waitress know I'm downstairs. We go to the corner, candle lit table. The waitress is cute. We order two dirty martini's and some seared ahi tuna. This girl is gorgeous and into girls. I don't know if there is a better combination. I have fucked this girl once before, long ago one drunk night. She had to be home early, which is fine by me.

Before we went out, I stopped by the liquor store and bought some red wine and threw it in the back seat. While we finished our martini's she asked if I wanted another drink.

"Yea sure..."
"Okay, but after this drink I have to go home...I need to be home by 10."
"Well lets go back to my apartment and have a glass of wine then, rather than staying here."
"Alright!"

Although I moved closer to Boston, I still have my apartment in New Bedford. I am letting a friend from the military live their at the moment until he starts making the big bucks. So I call this guy up and let him know I'm bringing back a young lady. He knew that was the plan...so he put on some easy listening music and made sure the apartment was in order. I show up, he lets me in. I invite him to join us for a glass of wine, but as planned, he gracefully declines and says he was leaving to meet up with a friend.

I pour us some wine, we sit on the couch, and shortly after she is sucking my dick. One of the best at it I might add. If a girl can't suck dick, get a new girl. There is nothing better than a girl who gets into it. I fuck her on the couch, lay her on the ground and finish in her ass. It was 11...much past her curfew. I don't think she minded. I drive her back to Walmart to get her car and call my brother. My initial plan was to crash on his couch at his college.

He asks if I want to go to this irish pub down the street for a beer. Sure why not. I go to the pub and have a beer while I wait for his arrival. My ex dating partner text'd me and said she is at the bar next door. There is a fund raiser for the college. Awesome...so I go next door and this place is packed with hot little college girls! I tell my brother, and by the time he gets there, there is a line out the door. He decided to just go home.

I see all these girls I haven't seen in a long time. As I am walking around, girls are staring me down. I know it's because of my awesome shirt. As I pass this girl...easily a 9, she pulls me to her and we start grinding. My ex and a few other girls see this and I know it is stiring up their little girl emotions. Her body is as tight as a 20 year old can get. I tell her I have to go, and she gives me her number.

As I am walking around, I see this other girl who opted to stop talking to me because I wouldn't commit to her. She is a nationally ranked tennis player, in grad school. I love her ass and long red hair. If I didn't mention this, I love her ass! Although we stopped talking, we are still on good terms, thanks to brutal honesty.

She runs up to me and give me a big hug. I haven't seen her in a few months. She apologizes for getting upset with me before. I didn't even realize she was upset. She just said if I couldn't commit to her she couldn't still see me. And as it goes, I had to let her go...I'm not upset by any means.

I see a friend who is leaving to go to another bar, and I decide to go with him. The bar is walking distance. We walk in and there is music playing and a small, semi empty dance floor. Naturally I start dancing and singing...pointing at the girls in the room. In essense, I am singing to them. One girl starts taking pictures of me. I walk past, point at her and wink. I act like I'm a rock star because it's fun. I am an average looking guy with more confidence than should be warranted. I have noticed that the girls I fuck have guys chasing them that are much better looking than myself. Instead of feeling insecure about it, I think it empowers me. I put a spell on girls and they can't explain it. I can. The less you care, the more you get. Simple.

I catch up with this little blond girl that I used to date. It's always a pleasure seeing her. As I go to get a beer, the girl that I winked at earlier just comes up and introduces herself. She shows me the pictures she took of me. I tell her how weird she is. We start dancing and she is wearing a little skirt, and a nice little thong. I am being rather forward with her. She is 20 and I tell her she is much too young and I stopped dancing with her. She followed me off the dance floor and professed how mature she is and how she prefers older guys. I tell her I'd think about it...and find out she lives on campus. I told her how I was staying with my brother, but that I wasn't sure if he would answer his phone if he was sleeping.

"Well you could stay at my place if your brother doesn't answer!"

"Ok, well maybe I'll give you a call later then..."

While I was at this bar, the tennis player was texting me saying how she missed what we had...our casual and fun relationship. She was leaving the bar and heading home, and asked if I wanted to come over.

I get my Jeep parked across the street and pick her up from the bar next door. We go to her little apartment on campus. Naturally, I fuck her from behind. I don't know if I'm capable of loving a girl in her entirety, but when I fuck, I love pussy so much. I have an addiction to it. It was nearing 2 am. I tell her I have to go because I had my friend's keys and I had to let him in.

I text the girl from the bar and she gives me directions to her building, comes down and lets me in. She is still wearing the skirt...but this time no thong.

My alarm goes off at 6:50. I wake up and I'm not sure who's bed I'm in. I look around and it take me a minute to remember exactly where I was. I told her I had to get ready for work. I went to my Jeep, got my clothes that I conveniently packed, grabbed my gym bag with my towel and personal toiletries and took a shower. Fortunately I don't require much more than 5 hrs sleep, and I always drink in moderation to keep my head clear.

I don't prefer going out alone, but when I do I always works out well. I always pack a bag in the event that I don't come home. I also think my new shirt kicked ass and gave me all the company I needed.

3 Girls 1 Date

2009-10-29T10:11:00.000-07:00

There may be a point where you become adequate enough at game and pick up, that you could potentially walk into a bar and pick up an attractive girl with no problem. This would become a regular occurrence. Sometimes you leave with the hottest girl in the bar, sometimes with just a 7 or 8...If you are running proper Casual Game, then you will have a solid 4-5 girls in the rotation, constantly trying to upgrade. It's not quantity, it's quality....luckily for us, it's both.

So what happens when you fuck a girl, leave her house to go to another girl's house...You take a shower at girl 2's house because you're meeting up for drinks with a girl in an hour and a half. She doesn't ask or expect you to stay because she knows she can't. As you're drying off...and the girl is still laying in bed recovering, you realize that you're fucking bored?

When this happens I do things to entertain myself. I've written about some of them. I set up dates with girls from bars without exchanging phone numbers or names. We just set a meeting place and a time and hoped we'd each show up. I try different style dates. I try different openers and closers. I recently didn't give a girl my phone number and told her to find me on missed connections, inspired by one of my favorite comedy stand up routines. Last night I was driving home and I had a new idea.

There was a show, that I wish was on more frequently. Elimidate. Only great things ever came from Elimidate. Girls getting trashed, girls being sluts, guys acting like the biggest pussies. That was quality TV, back when I had TV. So what if....what if I changed the whole dynamics of a standard, one on one date?

This seed of an idea started on Tuesday night. I was hanging out with a girl who was a friend of mine. I had not slept with her and never really had any intention of doing so. Her roommate was a cute blond girl that I regularly flirted with but that's it. A few beers later, after all this time, I find out that they are bisexual and often fuck. This just even FURTHER proves to me that a lot more girls are open to bisexual behavior than you would think! A lot more! It just takes the right kind of guy, the right kind of relationship and the right kind of wording to build that tree of trust, and draw out those bisexual tendencies.

This brings me back to Elimidate. In this show, essentially what happens is a guy goes on a date with 5 girls, and 1 girl "wins" the date. The guy could be ugly with nothing going for him, but the girls will still compete for the date. (I understand they are also competing because they are on TV, but there is a psychological aspect to the date that is valid) This ugly guy now has choices, which makes him more attractive to the girl. The same reason why you would feel more comfortable approaching an attractive girl if there were a lot of other, more attractive girls in the room.

If I was on that show, I wouldn't always go for the hottest, or the sluttiest girl. (The sluttiest usually wins) I also would not say that there only can be 1 winner. In my elimidate episode, there could be 2 or 3 winners. I saw a lot of past contestants miss a lot of great opportunities because they set the goals of the night to be the last standing girl vs the last standing girls!

My idea is to change the dynamics of a typical date to resemble something more along the lines of Elimidate. How could you set this up? Could this actually work? I thought long and hard on my drive home and I think yes.

The set up:
You meet a girl, get her phone number and set up a date for Thursday night.
You meet a second girl and also invite her out Thursday night.
You meet a third girl and again, invite her out Thursday.

I think 3 is the optimal number. This could also work if you substituted a new girl with a girl open to this idea. The week of the Thursday night date, you mention to them in passing that a few of your friends were also going to be there...

I would bring them to a small wine and tapas bar that has dim lighting and a few small round tables set off in the corners. This table would comfortably fit a party of 4. Before we seat ourselves at this table, I would subtly order a bottle of wine with 4 glasses as I walk past a waitress. The first few minutes could be a bit awkward so we need the drinks flowing right away.

3 is the optimal number for a few reasons:
1. Think of every girl you've known who lived in an apartment with an odd number of girls. There is ALWAYS one girl out. The idea is that there will be one girl that will either be a bitch or not get along with the other 2. This could be a bonding experience for the other two.
2. If you are picking three girls, there is a slim chance that all 3 will be cool and fun, so there is room pick and choose.
3. With 3 you have room to eliminate 1, and still have an opportunity for a threesome.
4. If two girls suck, you still have the possibility of one being cool.
5. If you were to do more than 3 girls...5 for instance is just too many girls to honestly make this work. It would be hard to stop side bar conversations.

Once we have the set-up, how do we make this work?

First off, you introduce everyone. There is no need to tell anyone that you are all essentially just meeting and that this is a 3 way date. They will make assumptions, and those will all be cleared up after a few drinks. Start off by just talking casually. You need to feel out each girl and her personality. The idea is that you will be eliminating one girl as the night goes on. You wouldn't need to actually tell her she is "eliminated." By giving one girl the least amount of attention, she would probably excuse herself from the night.

As this whole scenario goes down, there are a few things you have to do mentally:

First: You must be assertive. Only the most alpha of males could pull this off. You have to be assertive and send the message that you are the prize. If you are second guessing yourself, this will fall apart right before your eyes.

Second: You have to assume the sale. These rules always apply, but even more so here. You can't just assume attraction, you need to assume sex. A derivative of this assumption is that you have to assume that these girls are into girls. After the things I have seen, I feel like any girl could be into it! I have been surprised enough times that I am not surprised anymore...

Unless things are going extremely well with all three girls, you will stay at the table until one girl leaves. Once one girl excuses herself, I would move upstairs to the bar. Here I would sit in between each girl and probably switch over to captin' and coke. The bar tender knows me well and would hook us up. It is at the bar that we would finish our 3rd-4th drink, making everyone more comfortable.

At this point the two remaining girls would either be fighting for your attention or getting along. Both scenarios could lead to a threesome. After we finish our drinks here, we pay the tab, accept any cash that gets thrown your way (You can prompt them, and they will pay if they are trying to impress you) and change venues.

You change venues at this point because you want some out right kino escalation. The bar next to us is this small bar with music on the second floor, and beer and darts on the first. Stay one the second and move to the dance floor. Here is where you basically bring both of their buying temperatures to the max. Build the sexual tension as much as you can with each girl.

Building sexual tension:
1. When your dancing, touch, grab, rub, but don't go too far, even if she wants you to. They may be fighting for your attention at this point, so don't let one girl dominate too much.
2. If they try to kiss you, do it for a quick, quick second, but then leave them hanging. Leaving them mid kiss, wanting more is the FASTEST way to build that sexual tension. Making out deflates it. Slightly kiss both girls before you leave the bar.

This part of the date is less instructional and should be more intuitive to someone who is good with women. Plunge into the pool if you want to learn how to swim.

Before you went out on the date, you should have bought two large, cheap bottles of white wine. Don't ask, just bring them outside by their hands. Tell them you are tired of dancing and you'd rather just relax with a glass of wine. They will agree that it sounds better. They walk to your vehicle and you bring them back to your place.

Depending on if they are competing for your attention or embracing their bisexualness will change how you work the final stages of the date. If they are embracing it, then follow these steps. If not, then keep up the competition.

Get home, pour a glass of wine for each. Before you even finish that one single glass of wine, take the less aggressive girl into your bedroom. The other will follow. From here the magic should happen. Go back and fourth at first, and then try to give them both attention at the same time. *Don't spend too much time drinking at your house, you need to strike while the iron is hot, that's why I say less than one glass. If you have made it this far, you should know what to do...

There are many ways this night could play out, but I can't seem to think of any that are really that negative. In even the very worst case scenario, all three girls are appalled at what you just orchestrated, and they throw their drinks in your face...you still have a hilarious story to tell. You would still get my respect for the attempt, which is more valuable than gold.

A Dead Bat in Paraguay

2009-10-26T16:13:00.000-07:00

If you read Roosh's blog, you might have a certain expectation of what his book might entail. You may have a certain expectation of his level of game and of his admiration for South America. "A Dead Bat in Paraguay" might surprise you. If you're not familiar, click on the link and he gives a short video overview of the book.

If you do any traveling what so ever you will be able to relate to his experiences. I was reminded of my travels through Europe and of the short friendships I had. People I really enjoyed talking to and people I admired. I was also reminded of the military and the first time I moved away from home. The way each experience was articulated, you could really remember feeling those same emotions....good and bad.

There was no sugar coating or diluting any of the experiences he went through. Stories that some people would take to their grave, Roosh wrote in black and white for the world to read. That's what made this book so funny but also so intriguing. After some of his stories, you realize he is giving you the full experience and holding nothing back.

"I sat in the front seat and the chubby girl got on my lap. I positioned her body in a way that much of her weight was against the door instead of crushing my body"

While I was reading this book, I was doing a little bit of traveling of my own. I was up in Maine at one point, staying in this vacation cabin with a girl. One night while she was getting ready for bed I was reading through a few chapters and I began laughing. Imagining how some of this stuff went down, I was reading it out loud. She kept wanting me to read more of it.

I mostly enjoyed reading about the different people he met as he traveled. Each had different personalities. Different ways of surviving, different ways of interacting and different ways of picking up girls. Some with a shot gun style, "I don't give a fuck" method and others with much more charisma.

Being an advocate of picking up women, I enjoyed that aspect of the book. You read about his relentless effort to pick up girls, and how he and his new found friends analyze this new territory of women. How he would go out alone at times or go out in less than desirable physical conditions. I imagine it in my own head how some of my own approaches would go or how I'd handle situations.

"In the past I preferred being alone fantasizing about a happy relationship than actually having that relationship, because one takes commitment and sacrafice and the other doesn't"

This book has a wide range of ups and downs along with recurring themes that keep your interest. It was well written. He makes a lot of clever observations. I had kept a small notebook and wrote down the ones I thought were funny or insightful.

If you have an interest in traveling to South America, this book is broken down city by city. If you have traveled at all, you can relate to these stories easily. If you have an interest in pick up or are in the mood to read a funny tragedy with a lot of self deprecating humor...this book will for sure keep you entertained. Most of all, it is a no holds bar, insightful look into a section of someone's life through a life changing decision and experience.

Definitely check it out: A Dead Bat in Paraguay

Time Compromising

2009-10-16T12:05:00.000-07:00

The most valuable thing in the world is time. How do you spend it? Women can destroy it if you let them, but only a weaker man would let this happen. I see it everywhere. People who live with their girlfriends and wives. Miserable, not even wanting to go home, not even looking forward to the weekends. I know the feeling because I've been there myself years and years ago, and I thank God for that terrible experience when I was just a young lad.

You may not realize this, but giving a girl the upper hand and staying with her is a conscious decision. You always have choices. It would be my suggestion that if you can't regain the upper hand, then sacrifice that relationship, no matter how hot or rich she is. The last time I didn't have the upper hand was when I was 20 and living with a hot blond 26 year old. Captured and stuck, I didn't know how to escape. I was naive and dug myself deep into a hole. I knew breaking up with her would be a challenge. She didn't want to. She had a crazy side so extreme that many of you may never see something this far over on the bell curve. Stories that wouldn't even make sense. The night I broke up with her, I told her I had a deployment to Turkey and that we should go our separate ways. She lost her mind. She smashed a glass candle on the ground and started stomping on it with hear bare feet, asking why I'm not stopping her. I faked a deployment to Turkey to get out of this relationship. The severity of her craziness is nothing to joke about. I put on my uniform, packed my A-3 bags and moved 2 miles up the street.

You only need a quick lesson in the subject of "crazy" to recognize it and control/escape it. You just can't ever give her the upper hand. The time that you spend with her, unhappy, you can never get back. Any compromise you make that costs you time is time wasted. You should do whatever you want, whenever you want. The only way you can do this is by being blatantly honest. When you're honest, there is nothing they can say.

I had a conversation with a girl I am dating just the other day. She brought up the point that I never go to the events that she wants me to. I don't go to her friends' parties. I don't commit to dinner plans when her cousins are in town. I don't meet up after work for drinks. This is all true. I have an agenda that I prefer. Finally she said,

"I think I go out of my way for you a lot more often than you do for me..."

So how would you respond to that? Naturally your might want to defend yourself and explain all of the times you have gone out of your way for her, etc. That is a beta response. Truthfully, I am happy with the way things are. I don't want to put in any more effort. So I simply tell her...

"yea, you probably do..."

"what? so what do I do?" she asks.

"Whatever you want, it's more of an issue for you than me."

This is a true statement. I don't have a issue, she does. If she doesn't like it then she has to make a decision to accept it or not.

Time is valuable. Once a girl starts making you compromise your time, that resentment will build. Doing what I want keeps me happy, which in turn will keep her happy. If I'm not putting in enough effort then there are other guys out there who will skip the gym for her, hang with her girlfriends and go to work tired. The irony is that those guys will probably get dumped by her as well.. Marriage is becoming less appealing compared to a successful single man's life...

Missed Connections

2009-10-13T08:18:00.000-07:00

Missed Connections....what a funny site. It is funny to read through a few of these...the hopes and dreams typed out into paragraphs and short stories hoping to make that connection that they lost...because they didn't have the balls to start a conversation.

I like comedians. I have my own skits and routines I run through, not on stage yet, but to girls. I feel like there are parallels. When I tell them about how I work at a restaurant on the weekends, I tell them how I often meet women there. It's a tough world out there for a 27 year old single guy so I have to try at any opportunity to find true love when I see it. Sometimes I see opportunity where others don't. For example, there are times when I am waiting on an attractive girl and her boyfriend. Her boyfriend might be a guy who is wearing an affliction t-shirt with a fresh haircut and for some reason sun glasses. You can't just ask this girl out! You have to attack this opportunity in a different manner. You take the guy's order first. Once he orders, he focuses on the television. Then you word the next phrase very carefully. You turn to the girl, take her entree order then ask her..

"so would you like any soup, missed connections, or salad with that?" She heard it, but did she? Her boyfriend is trying to catch the score of the football game so he doesn't have a clue.

This is a story I tell girls, when I tell them of my search for true love.

Saturday night I meet this tall, attractive blond girl. A friend of mine asks, "How do I approach her?" He was nervous of her judgment as she was 6' with heels on and he was 5'9" with his shoes on. A girl's height shouldn't deter you. She may like you she may not. She isn't always 6' tall. Well he found a shorter girl and some how I ended up talking to the tall blond. It turned out we had a mutual friend. She had heard of me, but I had not of her.

She lives in NY, and I have a new site there. I will be visiting NY soon. I tell her how I try to pick up girls at the restaurant using my missed connection deal, but it hasn't worked yet. At the end of the night she came back to my friend's house, with her friend. Unfortunately her friend was less attractive, got less attention and wanted to leave. As we are going our separate ways, the subject of phone numbers came up. I told her to find me on missed connections. We didn't exchange numbers...

http://providence.craigslist.org/mis/1416382774.html

I did get a response from her, along with other girls who are probably really pathetic. And having a love for comedians, here is another link of one of my favorite skits concerning this subject.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_CTnub5tHlI

I'll post her response...her humor is clever but it did get slightly annoying...

Does she have a bf? I don't know, I didn't ask....

2009-10-06T10:45:00.000-07:00

I am not an advocate of actively pursuing a girl who I know has a boyfriend. Not "actively" means I will not try too hard. "Pursuing" means sleep with. I will not try too hard to sleep with a girl who has a boyfriend. This doesn't mean that it doesn't happen. A lot of the time I may not even know.

When there is a girl you find attractive, it is natural to want to get to know her on a certain level. You may talk to her directly, or if you have mutual friends you may first talk to them. If you are seeking a casual hook-up, there is one question you should always avoid. "So do you have a boyfriend?" Don't ask her friends, don't ask her...that is information that you don't need to know. In this area, you are on a need to know basis. There are a few reasons you want to avoid this questions.

She may have a boyfriend but she may not care. If you are making it clear that you are interested in a sexual relationship, she will bring up her boyfriend right away if she is not interested. Generally, the longer a girl waits to tell you, the more interested she is.

If you ask her, you may be shooting yourself in the foot. Asking her that question makes her verbalize something she may not even want to talk about. You've now set that guilt on her shoulders, and locked the door in front of you. Always assume the sale.

Even if she doesn't have a boyfriend, there is a good chance she is dating someone, or has been on recent dates with people. No good comes from talking about this subject.

Serial dating does run you the risk of jealous guys confronting you. One of my more recent incidents was something small, but almost humorous. A girl called me up one night, I stopped by her house for 20-30 minutes and then left. The next morning, 8:30 am, I am peacefully driving to work and I get a call from this girl. I thought this was strange, but I answered. Apparently it was her boyfriend that I never asked or knew about. He seemed angry with me on the phone. I laughed to myself, thinking how he was such a fool for committing to a girl like this. His taunting and threats had no bearing on me, since I felt it was his problem more than mine. I politely told him he was embarrassing himself and I hung up. He never called back. I have had plenty of other confrontations that were face to face. I almost feel like I want to give these guys advice...only one unfortunate guy actually got physical and took a swing.

Crimes of passion...Envy is a waste of time, you already have everything you need...

Conversation Starters

2009-10-02T13:44:00.000-07:00

I have heard of people not wanting to go out because they are embarrassed of having crutches or a cast. I always thought to myself that they were missing a big opportunity for a great conversation starter! Aside from it easily starting conversations, you already know how it's going to start....They are going to ask you how you injured yourself. Is there an easier way to get a girl's interest than having her come up and flat out ask you to tell her a good story?

I am not someone who likes to ask for help. I usually believe I can do everything myself. Over the years I have come to the conclusion that sometimes people WANT to help. Now when people offer things, I analyze the situation and if I feel like it fits my wants or needs, I take people up on their offer. It makes them feel better and it builds a small bond between you and that person that "helped" you. This ties into my leg injury.

So in the case that you do have an injury and you need crutches...ice it when you need to, but take advantage and go out as well. When you are crutching around, don't make grunting faces like it hurts or that you're putting in a ton of effort. This would make you less approachable. Also, have a good story to tell. People are going to ask. Who cares if it's the truth...no one wants to hear a boring story.

Also, if you see an attractive girl...make it a point to need help carrying something. Yesterday I made a girl carry a soda all the way to my desk when I could have easily carried it.

This just opened my eyes a little more to the idea that girls will initiate conversation if they have a good conversation starter. Mystery has been pounding it in people's heads since day 1, and it makes complete sense. He wears goggles on his head, and girls come up and ask him why? He wears that big hat and girls want to see it...

While I was in Miami, I met a group of girls in a baccalaureate party, asking if any of them were nurses. Then a girl let me have one of their huge fake diamond rings that they give out to all of the members of the party. The ring is plastic and can adjust to any finger size and it flashes every 3 or 4 seconds for additional attention. This was a gold mine. Although I didn't stick with this group of girls, I was able to start a million other conversations with this ring.

One of my favorite props that Mystery used was large headphones at a club. When asked about them, he would say "This music sucks, so I brought my own!" then he would put his headphones back on.

Well it's Friday...there are adventures to be had.

An Unforeseen Injury

2009-09-30T10:05:00.000-07:00

So I just got back from Miami. I am supposed to be in New York....but I have a huge cast on my leg. I have not posted anything in quite some time! I have a lot of things to catch everyone up on. My trip to Wyoming, my trip to Denver, Miami, a review on Roosh's new book A Dead Bat in Paraguay. I apologize for keeping everyone waiting for so long...

Well my first post back, I will just give you a run down of what happened to my leg:

So this post might seem funny, but I assure you it is serious business. As some of you may know, and some of you may not....I am wearing a cast on my right leg from the knee down. Many people have been asking me... "Tyler, what happened to your leg?" And an often response is, " : / Basketball..." (Notice the 'ehhh' emoticon face). I say basketball because it is an easy response, but I feel an obligation to tell all of you the truth of what happened.

That day I did play basketball, but it has nothing to do with my injury. Later that day I went to sign up for a sky diving class in Miami Beach. Well I happen to be wearing my new sneakers...the fastest ones on the east coast. When walking to the training, I had to cut through a rough neighborhood. Some savvy locals knew the rarity of my sneakers and made an attempted robbery. These savvy fellows are no longer a member of the greater Miami community.

So I made it to the sky diving training, but I made it late. The instructor just told me, "grab a bag" meaning a parachute. I did, and apparently I arrived AFTER they packed the chute into the bag. We were practicing how to pull the cord and steering. 30 minutes later we all went up into the plane. The pilot told us that since we were amateurs we were only allowed to go 14 thousand feet in the air. That didn't "fly" with me, excuse my pun. So I take over, bring this hot rod up to 20k feet. You can guess what happened next....

No one wanted to jump at this height, except for me. They warned me that with the wind and at this location, there was no telling where I'd land. So I jump out, not realizing yet that I didn't actually have a chute packed. Once I pulled the cord I made this face, = O and thought to myself that, proper planning can prevent plummeting parachutes.

Initially I was nervous, but I knew that if I could hit the ground at the correct angle, there is a good chance I could roll with it and not really incur any injury. As I his terminal velocity I realize that I am not approaching a landing in a beautiful field where daisys are growing amongst tall, soft and inviting grass. This must have been why they didn't want me to jump yet.

I was approaching what the Spanish refer to as encierro or, Running of the Bulls. I knew that Miami had a high Hispanic population, but this was ridiculous...The only silver lining to the cloud I was falling through was that it seemed as though I was about to land quite a distance in front of the leading bull, hopefully giving me enough time to shimmy out of the way. My concern, other than the landing itself, was the fact that I was wearing a red shirt. Initially I was thinking that if I got stuck in a tree I'd be easy to find. Now I will be the "bullseye" of a parade of raging bulls.

And so it goes, I land right in front of this pack of bulls....this herd of bulls, this flock of bulls....at the moment, I can't think of what a group of bulls are called because they are violently racing at me. As I land, I instinctively roll to the right to take the impact off of my right leg and I follow up with 6 consecutive barrel rolls. This is a good, because a single or double roll would mean a more dangerous degree of landing. Adrenaline was rushing through my veins like class 6 rapids flowing through a bed of sharp rocks. There is no telling if I hurt my ankle here or with the events that followed.

I stand up and run towards the plywood walls which are there for directing the bulls, rather than protecting the patrons of Miami hiding behind it. My thought was that if I could dive over the board they might stick with their designated route. Then I make direct eye contact with the leading bull. It is clear now that he is angry at the site of my red shirt, and hiding behind a flimsy wooden board will do nothing to prevent this bull from charging. It became clear to me what I had to do.....establish dominance.

I stopped running, turned around and took the bull on... Mono e Mono. I knew I would be able to wrestle the bull because when I was younger I had a yellow lab, Jake, and we fought often. Dogs fight using their head, and mouth. Biting. To win a match with a bull you need more training than merely just a few matches with the family dog. That's when I realized the training I encountered from the small lion I once owned would also come into play. Felines fight more with their paws and wily movements. Bulls will use their horns, but will buck with their feet. I got down low as the bull approached me, as if I were going to take him head on, and then I moved to my left. I was able to swing up on top, on the bull's back and put him in a choke hold I once learned in a Judo class. Just as when I would fight Jake, I wrapped my legs around the beast so it couldn't throw me and put my head down safely behind the rapid movements of his head. I choked with all of my might, cutting off not only the oxygen flow, but the blood flow to his tiny little bull brain. It took me 57 seconds until he fell to the ground, where it only takes 9 seconds for me to choke a human into unconsciousness. His lack of concentration sent him barreling through the plywood, not following the standard path that the other bulls chose to take. This worked in my favor, because although I could fight one bull, I don't think I could fight many.

As the bull fell, he leaned to his right and landed on my right ankle. Animal lovers, please note that I just made him pass out, and did not put the bull out of his misery with this invaluable choke. It took 15 people to pick the bull up so I could remove my leg. I stood up and shook it off. I knew that all of my friends also jumping were landing 15 miles from where I landed, so I laced up my sneakers and took off. It wasn't until I arrived 15 miles later that I realized I had a slight pain in my right ankle.

Long story short, I went to the hospital. The doctor looked at it, asked me if this part of my ankle hurt, and this part, and this part....and he said. "Well, it looks like you have some broken bones, let's get you x-rayed." I remember thinking...this couldn't be.

I get wheeled into the X-ray room and I tell Heather, the technician, that my bones were made of steel and it seemed impossible that I could actually break any of them. "It looks pretty broken to me..." 20 minutes and 4 x-ray negatives later, Heather comes out from the back with a look of amazement. "You're bones are made of steel!!!" she expressed.

I have no broken bones. I do have some major spraining, but all in all, it could have been worse. That might be the last of bull fighting that I'll do for a while....as far as jumping out of planes....that seemed pretty easy.

House Cleaning....

2009-09-08T14:21:00.000-07:00

I have been moving this last week and I have been traveling quite a bit. I am setting up internet in my new apartment but as of right now, I owe this blog about 5 posts. I have been keeping notes of things I have been meaning to write so I'll be updating it soon!

Here is a short short story written at the tail end of my work day...

So this week I have been moving. In my old apartment I grabbed the big items I needed, bed, dresser, clothes, etc...The apartment was a mess. The dishes hadn't been done, I had papers on the floor, things that just got thrown around during the move.

My new apartment doesn't allow pets, so I couldn't bring the lion that I have raised and trained since she was a small feline. I trained her in hand to hand/knife/gun combat. She is savvy with technology and is great with espionage. Heartbreaking. I had to give her to someone who would take care of her. I looked through my list of girls. They all thought they had some connection with this animal, giving her more anthropomorphic characteristics than deemed necessary. The one girl who I knew would like her was a girl I dated but left for Australia 8 months ago. She is back in the States and got a new apartment and was ecstatic when I asked if she could take her.

This girl is one of the most attractive and one of the most enjoyable girls I have met. Before she left for Australia she admitted to looking through my phone while I was in the shower. Unfortunately for her, sneakily going through my phone is something I don't approve of. She may not of liked what she saw, but she lost that internal struggle to sacrifice her own pride and tell me she stooped to look through my phone to confront me about some text messages she didn't feel comfortable looking at. If she asked, I would have shown her as I don't lie to girls. She knew I dated other girls. She wanted to see the hard evidence. She was too curious. I don't put my phone on silent, I don't hide my phone, I don't put a lock on my phone. I don't do any of this because this is how I screen girls. If they want to look...go ahead. If they are that curious to look, than the chances are it will eat them up inside enough that they will confront me. Then I leave with zero remorse.

Well I gave this beautiful girl the keys to my apartment while I was on my way to Boston. I put out all of the cat's belongings in the kitchen and told her to lock up when she left and I'd be back to get the keys. She showed up at my work on Sunday, dressed to the 9's, returned my keys and said she cleaned everything and thanked me again for letting her take my cat. Our conversation lingered and I could tell she didn't want to leave, but I had work to do.

I went home that night to my old apartment just to grab a few more small items and I was quite surprised. I opened the door and the apartment was cleaned from top to bottom. Every single dish was washed. Every piece of paper was stacked up. The carpets were vacuumed, the stove was clean.....everything. She said she cleaned everything but I thought she meant she gathered the cat's stuff. This must have taken hours! There was also an envelope with a 4 page letter in it....

The funny thing is....2-3 years ago I would probably never have even tried to approach this girl, with the thought that she is out of my league. The letter has some interesting insight to how I work....she wouldn't know that though. It is all still a mystery to her.

Well, at least my fucking house is clean....

Prep for Miami

2009-08-25T07:11:00.000-07:00

I'm heading to Miami in about a month. This month I'll buckle down on my diet, hit the gym with a little more priority and sleep more. Those are the three main areas to focus on when you are trying to get in good shape. The guys down in Miami are pretty roided up, but I don't give a shit. If anything, focusing on the gym a little more would give me more of a confident mental edge than physical. Chistle out my abs a little more and add a few pounds to my shoulders and traps and I'll be rearing to go.

I have been talking to people about Miami. I hear it's one of the hardest places to hook up with girls. PUA's get chewed up and spit out. The guys I am going with do very well with picking up girls. They went last year and none of them got laid. One guy got black out drunk and slept with a prostitute...but I don't get black out drunk, and I don't sleep with prostitutes. I'll check out the night scene, but I heard day game is where it's at. That's how you get your ducks in a row for the evening. We have a few nights free stay at the W hotel, so we have a nice place to entertain guests. It might be difficult but I am up for the challenge...

Here is also a quick note on kino escalation. It's something small, not life changing advice, but is something to try out for yourself. I have noticed it works quite well. It works when you are next to a girl and things are moving along fine, but you want to just throw a sexual vibe out there. Just run your fingers lightly up their forearm. I read this somewhere...and I started trying it out. You can use it in different contexts. An example would be if you were sitting on the couch, and you want to move from a stalling conversation to something more sexual. Lead it off with that move. Running your fingers up her forearm would give her goosebumps and be more effective than grabbing her hand or the fact that your arm is lying on her leg like a dead fish. I would do it mid conversation and just smile at her with no verbal acknowledgment. It's not sexual...but it is.

Well if anyone has any comments or advice about Miami let me know. And I'll leave you with a quote that showed up on my iGoogle homepage daily quote box...

"I tended to place my wife under a pedestal." - Woody Allen

Thanks Woody...

Pull the Trigger!!

2009-08-24T11:24:00.000-07:00

I am moving into my new place in a week. I am in the process of packing, moving and I want to get in a quick post before I get too tied up. I had an interesting weekend with some funny observations.

Friday I went to a friend's house. They are low key guys. They wanted to go to the VFW for some cheap beers. This isn't my place of choice, but whatever. I thought we were just going there for a few drinks, but before I could get half way done with one beer they were placing a new one in front of me. We met up with this other guy Nate, who I have never met before. He seemed like a decent guy, but a little socially awkward. After a while I started to get cabin fever in this place. With old veterans sleeping at the bar, one crazy guy watching us play darts and yelling random obscenities, and the room so filled with smoke that my eyes were bloodshot, I didn't care that beers were two dollars, I needed to leave. We talked about where to go. We were in Dorchester, which is not notoriously a good area here in the Boston area. We go to this place called Ups N Downs. I want you to take a look at some of the reviews this place got, just to get an idea. Here's the link: Ups N Downs I think one of my favorite reviews was this one: "This is a great place to go if you want to get shot, stabbed, contract an STD or score some drugs. You can do all 4 at once if you're lucky. Seriously, this place scares the beejesus out of me. Stay away."
So this place was ghetto. I had never been. My friends and this Nate fella warned me that this may not be the safest place, but assured me that it was close. I said I don't care...I just want to go somewhere else. So Nate decided he wanted to drive. I get in the front seat and we leave. I haven't been talking to Nate too much, and I apparently underestimated how completely shitfaced he was, until he came less than an inch from smashing into the parked SUV that was on the right side of the road. We all gripped our seats and clenched as we prepared for impact. I don't know how we missed this thing. I had Nate pull over and decided to take over the driving responsibilities. We made it there in one piece.

We walk in, and the way they explained this place, it didn't seem too bad. It seemed a little sketchy but not how they described it. We ordered a few drinks and went upstairs where the dance floor was. Upstairs was a completely different scene. I was definitely out of my element. I went to order a beer and as I passed the doorway that led to where the bathrooms were, I saw a girl peeing on the floor. There were two girls practically having sex on the bar, with a crowd...a legitimate crowd of people around them watching. There is a good chance those girls got raped that night. A group of girls started talking to me when I was ordering a drink, and I caught a few death stares for that. I thought I might get stabbed or shot that night, and I'm not kidding. A short time later the cops came and we all had to leave. I'm not sure what happened...but I knew it was time to go.

I went back to my friend's house. Nate was still too drunk to drive, so he slept on the floor with a few blankets. He pissed all over everything he slept on. He left a great impression and I'll be sure to hang out with him again...

My two friends that I typically hang out with on Saturday night were doing some sort of a date night with girls that they sometimes consider their girlfriends. No thanks. Instead I went out with some girls I work with and a handful of their friends. It was already established that I was with this one particular girl for the night, which is fine because she is attractive. The sad news is, her friend was visiting from out of town and begging to get laid. This girl was tall, thin, perfect size implants and looking for guys. It was not in my best interest to pursue her since I was already with her friend, but I just watched as guys sabotaged their softball lobs of chances to go home with this girl. How could guys fuck up something this easy? Guys were talking to her, but none of them had the balls to pull the trigger. I could see it happening. They didn't know what to say, they didn't know how to close the deal and make plans for after the bar. All they had to do was mutter the words "What are you doing after? Want to hang out?" and she would have gone for it. Here is some advice. When you are approaching a girl, go with the intent to go all the way. Don't stop at a point that you feel is enough. Pull the trigger and invite yourself over. Get the number and then close the deal. Bailing early is weak and can be big sticking point, so make a conscious effort to work through that.

Sunday I watched one of my all time favorite movies, American Psycho. Then I fucked a girl while I watched myself flex in the mirror.

This week and Game contemplation

2009-08-18T08:44:00.000-07:00

Sometimes I wonder, what would my life be like right now if I never opened up "The Game." Would I have a different view on things? I have noticed a transformation, and I think some of it can be credited to learning game, and also just time and experience itself.

When I was younger I did get laid...it's not that I never did. It's just that there was a very sloppy method. I would get nearly black out drunk, go to a club, meet a girl who was also black out drunk and go from there. I would just go to the local VA Beach clubs and walk around. I'd often want to forget what I did the night before. There was no skill involved. I did this over and over, and I can't say I got better at anything. Every once in a while I'd bang a hot girl. I would think that I got lucky. When I was lucky enough to find a hot girl, I'd date her. Looking back, I was foolish. I was selling myself short...but I think it's part of the learning curve. I knew I could get better looking girls. I envisioned the lifestyle long before I knew who Mystery and Style were. Owning a nice place, meeting good looking women, wining and dining them. Reading about game basically opened my eyes to something I knew already existed. Since then I have not been in a single long term relationship. I'm not even sure if I have been in an actual committed relationship. The more I went out, the more I practiced, the better I got at it. I became more comfortable in the presence of good looking women. I knew what to say, I knew what not to say and I learned that no matter what...the outcome was not a big deal. After a while it became more fun than work.

Three years later here I am. I have built up a pretty decent skill. There are guys much better than me, but I can confidently say that I can walk into nearly any busy bar and pull a few solid numbers from attractive girls. I have the ability to transform these phone numbers into the type of relationships that I want. I now have a better understanding of social situations and my experience of trial and error has made me more calibrated than before.

This has been my week so far...

Monday night I was home around 8 pm. I didn't make any plans for the evening and Alexis messaged me. "I'm going over this girl's house tonight, you should come...I already asked her if you could join us." I was slightly under the weather, but I might be able to muster the strength for a threesome.

"What time are you going over there?" I ask.

"Well I'm leaving around 8:30, so I'll probably be there around 9ish."

I assume they were probably going to hang out and drink for a while. I didn't really feel like hanging out or drinking too heavily, so I told her I'll show up around 10:30. I got her address and put it in my phone navigation to see how far she lived. My phone is like my little survival kit. It lets me communicate, navigate to and from anyone's house, research things I need to know and it wakes me up when it is time to leave. Anyways, this girl's house is 45 minutes away.

So I decide I'll probably leave around 10. I have plenty of time, so I take a nap. Then I wake up, take a shower and pour a glass of wine and relax. Finally I head out.

I pull up to this absolutely beautiful house. The driveway cuts through the woods up to the huge garage. I called Alexis when I arrive and they tell me to cut through the kitchen and go downstairs. The front porch has a built in hot tub and a stone pond surrounding the porch. The door is open and I lead myself through their kitchen and go downstairs.

I have never met this other girl before, I have only seen pictures. As I step down into the furnished basement I see both Alexis and Kim sitting on a leather wrap around couch, wearing nighties, drinking glasses of wine. In front of them is a big brick fireplace with a large flat screen hanging above it. I sit in between them and Kim gets me a beer. She comes and sits back down and we are all talking. She grew up in the same city as I did but went to a different school. She is also 4 years younger. She asked me if I knew a dozen different people. I knew all of them, but said I didn't know any of them. As we were talking, she was sitting a good 6 inches away from me. I thought to myself..."how will I make this a smooth transition from talking, to all of us having sex?" The best way I know how...I leave for a minute and let them get next to each other again. So I stand up, go grab a wine glass and pour myself some Shiraz. Just as I anticipated...Kim slid over next to Alexis. I go over and sit next to Kim.

Soon they start kissing and I start rubbing their pussies. Neither of them were wearing underwear. Then I stood up and start taking my clothes off and let them both suck my dick. That is always my favorite. Kim's body was amazing, so tan, so tight. It really turned me on, so I fucked her the most. After I came in Alexis's mouth and they made out, Alexis jumped in the shower. I grabbed Kim and brought her into her room and fucked her again while Alexis was cleaning up. I think that made Alexis jealous, but I don't care...

It was hot. They were both into each other which always makes for a good time. We all slept in her bed, I set my alarm to wake up, and I brought clothes to wear to work the next day. I always try to be prepared.

Wednesday I am staying in Boston at a girl's house and we are cooking dinner and drinking some wine.

On Thursday I have a date with a tiny little gymnast type girl. She is 22...5 ft nothing, and cute as hell. I am excited.

Friday I am probably going out with my friends to local bars...

This threesome was on a complete whim and not something I planned. The girls I am going out with the rest of the week are girls I met at bars by approaching them. I have been seeing one girl more than the rest, which hasn't happened in quite sometime.

This girl claims she is fine with us just "dating" with no commitment, but we have discussed it. She wants to know what my hesitations are, since most guys want a relationship with her withing 2 weeks of meeting her. Am I waiting for something better? Do I just not like commitment? Is it something to do with her? These are questions she asks.

I always hear young married people complaining about their significant other and I just think how bad that must suck. They are stuck with that person for the rest of their life or until they decide to make the large, inconvenient and expensive decision to get a divorce. I see friends living with their girlfriends and jumping at the chance to go out when their girlfriends' are not around. Even happy relationships seem boring.

I agree that Game can taint the way you view things, and that ignorance can be bliss...but I also think it keeps you looking out for #1. It makes your smarter, more confident and more socially savvy. The reason I am not committing to that girl right away is because there is careful evaluation going on. Does she have what I am looking for? How does she react in different situations? Is she worth giving up the life that I enjoy so much? Will she make things better then they currently are? It sure would be a waste of potential...

Low Tide

2009-08-11T10:06:00.000-07:00

When you are utilizing the casual dating guide to its fullest potential, you will have your schedule filled to the max with dates, nights out with your friends, other random events and days you designate to relax by yourself. There will be times when there are not enough days in the week to see all of the girls that you have an interest in, but there will also be times when you hit the other side of the spectrum.

There are times when I look through my phone and realize I don't have that many prospects, I am not interested in the girls I have been seeing, and I need to meet some new girls. Dating comes and goes the way the tide moves in and out. There will be times when the tide is low. Stay patient. Don't lower your standards and don't alter your confident state of mind. This is going to happen. Here are a few thoughts on low tide...

It happens to everyone. When I start to experience what I would refer to as a drought, or a lull in dating, I get excited! Literally! It means that high tide is coming in. It means I don't have to weather the dates of girls I already know, and I can venture out and fill up my schedule with completely new girls...whoever I choose.

I want to focus on one aspect of experiencing a low tide moment. How to deal with that moment when you are sitting at home and want to call a girl to come over.

Generally, I set up dates with women the week/weekend prior to when I want to see them. If I talk to a girl Sunday, I set up a date for Thursday because I already have plans Mon-Wed. If I talk to her on Thursday or Friday, I will suggest seeing her Tue or Wed. I have to plan out who I want to see and when. Even when I meet a girl for the first time, on the weekend, I try to set up a date for that upcoming week. Although I am impulsive, I need structure in that area in order to maintain efficiency. You are doing things correctly when a girl will call you and say, "I know you are busy, but next week I wanted to see if I could do your laundry and cook you dinner at some point." Point being, even though they want to do something for you, they know you have a busy schedule...

When you start hitting low tide, you might find yourself sitting on your couch after going to the the gym some night and wanting to have a girl over. You scroll through your phone book looking for someone. 1 of 3 things could happen.

1. You do find a girl in your phone that you had skipped over earlier in the week that you completely forgot to call. Now you are tempted to send her a text and see what she is up to tonight.

2. You want to call a girl you currently see on a 2/3 week basis, and invite her over out of rotation.

3. You start calling girls that you know damn well are in your phone and that would probably come over at the drop of a hat. Girls that you have already lost interest in....but since you're bored you are contemplating calling them.

Scenario 1: You have completely forgotten about that girl's number you got at the bar on Friday. It is now Thursday and you haven't contacted her once. Once a week has passed, the chances of you seeing that girl again will drastically reduce. If you want to see this girl again, you should probably give her a call rather than text. Call her somewhere between 8:30 and 9:45. Those times seem to get the greatest response. If you do decide to contact this girl, your focus should be setting up a future date, not trying to convince her to meet up with you that night. In most of my experience, it is very rare that a girl you haven't hung out with yet will respond to a last minute request to hang out. When you are in a "drought" the last thing you want to do is act like you are in a drought. Don't call girls in hopes of hanging out that night! In most cases, that rule will apply across the board!

Scenario 2: Don't call a girl that you had just recently seen, and ask if she wants to hang out again that night. You don't want want to give a girl the wrong impression, which is that you want to see her more than the 2-3 week alotted time. You also don't want to give the impression that you are bored. Part of her attraction to you is that you are unattainable, and unavailable. If you start calling her to see what she is doing THAT night, you are throwing that attraction you have built, that mystery of what you do with all of your time, in the trash. If you are dating higher caliber women at this point, most of them will not be readily available to come over the same night you call, and it will damages how they view your time.

Scenario 3: So you are bored at home now. Since you're currently in a "low tide" you don't have any plans for later on in the night. You look through your phone and see hundreds of numbers. There are those few names that you can think of that you have slept with in the past, or even recently. You have lost interest in these girls and they no longer text you because they know it is a dead end. You know damn well that if you texted 5 of them, that at least 1 or 2 would probably be available enough to come over. The fact that you are horny, the fact that you are bored, the fact that it would be completely effortless will convince you that you want to see these girls. You don't! Calling old lays is a waste of time and energy. As soon as you are done...the second you stand up from the bed, sweaty from fucking her as quickly as possible, and she is laying there looking up at you with hope in her eyes, you will be pissed at yourself. "Why did I just do that?" Will be the first thought that crosses your mind. This is not a confidence booster. It will not build you character. In the long run, it will not fuel that fire to find new, hotter girls.

The best thing you can do is just stick it out. If you don't have any prospects then make plans to go find some new ones. Call up a buddy and see if he wants to go out Thursday. Go out on your own and cruise the mall, get something to eat or go to a local bar. One day on my way home after a long day at work, I stopped in at a restaurant up the street from my apartment. I sat at the bar and had a glass of wine and a few plates of sushi. There was a handful of people at the bar having drinks, a work party of some sort. I didn't even have to initiate conversation. They started asking me questions...but I put myself in that situation. I went to a restaurant, I sat next to a group of people, and I became involved in their conversation.

Becoming comfortable with yourself is a prerequisite to becoming a good pick-up artist. The time you have to yourself should be enjoyable. This is when you will start to be excited about low tide moments. People will find it amazing that you are comfortable with jumping on a plane to D.C., or on a bus to NY just for the sake of an adventure, following no one's agenda but your own. People don't go out to eat on their own because they are uncomfortable with it. The only time you will make gains in your life is when you leave your comfort zone, and that is the only way you will become confident in yourself. So if you're bored right now, and you don't have a list of girls to pick from, get excited about it. It might take some time but some adventures could be off in the horizon.

Work Travel

2009-08-04T16:25:00.000-07:00

I wake up at 6 a.m. to gather my things before I catch my flight. My final destination is Douglas Wyoming and my flight leaves at 10. Chicago is where I'm catching my connecting flight, which fly's to Denver. From Denver we have to get a rental and drive 3.5 hours north to get to Douglas WY.

I meet Hudson at work and we take my Jeep in. We get to Logan Airport with plenty of time to spare. We check bags, board the plan and make it to Chicago. After getting our boarding passes they inform us that they are doing some maintenance on the plane and we may be delayed or taking a different flight. Sure enough the flight gets canceled. We get a new itinerary with a flight to South Dakota that leaves in 6 hours. THAT even gets delayed due to some aircraft maintenance. Fearing that we may miss our connecting flight in South Dakota, we try to convince travel to let us stay the night. We don't get delayed quite enough and we end up boarding the plane.

I sat in the emergency exit row. Conveniently, across the aisle is a very cute girl. The entire row is ours. The stewardess came by and had to get a verbal verification that if this plane goes down, that I personally would rescue everyone...and also that I could open the 40 pound door if we need to exit that way. So I tell her yes with much more intensity than is needed. I end up talking to the girl across the aisle, responsible for opening the other door. When she was asked to verbally confirm she was able to handle the Emergency Row responsibilities, she followed my lead with a very stern "yes!" She was funny and pretty interesting. She was flying back home after being in Korea for 9 months. Our conversation made the flight go by faster. Finally we made it to Denver around 9 o'clock.

The only rental car I qualified to take was this light blue PT Cruiser or a Minivan. Hudson and I went to talk to the staff running the lot. We asked if we could use Hudson's executive points to rent something on that side of the lot, but get the points put on my account. He said no, that wasn't possible. So I took a different angle and stood next to him and asked, "Man to man, do you want to see two grown men driving around in a little blue P.T. cruiser? I know there is a way you can give me the keys to maybe that Charger over there..." With a defeated grin he smiles and agrees that he could do that.

Now we have a 3 hour drive up to WY. I text the girl who I met last time I was here to see if she still wanted to hang out. She was overly excited, which was slightly deterring. None the less, she lives on the direct path to the hotel. So at 1:30 local time, 3:30 EST, I stopped in and picked her up. She said she could get a ride back in the morning, so she jumped in the back seat and headed to the hotel. She stayed over that night but left early.

In the morning I woke up with the birds. I only slept a few hours, but I was ready to go. I was in a new place with rolling hills and mountains off in the distance. The thought got me excited, so I threw on some shorts, grabbed my keys and ran out to the car. I drove up the street and grabbed a coffee, put on this serene station I found on the satellite radio. I opened up all of the windows, turned the volume up very loud, and drove in the direction of the sunrise. I drove fast and far because the road was long with no end in sight. I like being awake when most of the country is still sleeping...

The trainings went well. They days got long towards the end, but the nights brought a new energy. On Wednesday night we went to a place out in a city 50 miles away from Douglas. A wristband cost 15 dollars and it was all you could drink all night. That night wasn't great, but it had potential. We left by 11:30 to head back to our hotel. On the way back we were running low on gas. Living on the edge, I figured we could make it back. I know my jeep can run on E for hours! We really started getting low when we were two miles out, and sure enough, 1.5 miles away the engine shut down. I was driving pretty fast, so I threw it in neutral. I tell Hudson that we are out of gas. I think at first he was a little confused because we were still gliding at a speed of 70 or 80 miles an hour. We were going slightly up hill, but I was hoping after that peaked it was all downhill.

The car starts to slow down rapidly. Hudson gets behind the car and pushes as I am steering strait. We are nearing the peak of this slight incline. I take off the sandals I had on, open the door and jump out. We get the car going at a good speed and once we get over the peak it gets moving pretty fast. Hudson runs up and jumps in the passenger's side and then I jump back in and steer. We are heading down hill and I wanted to pick up enough speed to get through the off ramp. I open the door, standing up on the edge of the car I test the speed with my left foot. After 4 or 5 quick pushes with my left foot and I get a feel for the speed, I jump out and land in an instant sprint. The car was already going fast, but I put my head down and pushed it as fast as I could. I hear Hudson open the door and get out. I heard what I thought was his shoes hitting the ground and I looked over and didn't see him. I assumed he was going around back to push. I kept pushing and I look behind and he is fairly far behind the car. I jump back in and thought I might have to hit the breaks so he could get back in.

He ran up and was able to get in going downhill. We were cruising at top speed flying down the off ramp. I see a stop sign at the end of the ramp. I looked around and no one was coming so I blew through it. Then we were quickly approaching a red light. Another look around, no cars coming, we blow through that and pull up to a gas station. Hudson is rubbing his shoulder and saying he thinks he hurt it..."by pushing the car?" I ask. "No, I fell out of the car..." I was confused, I didn't see him fall. Apparently when I thought he was getting out to push from behind, he actually got out did some sort of a barrel roll. Hudson had a number of more drinks than myself, so I think his calibration was off. He just jumped out of the car underestimating the lighting speed we were going down the ramp. That is how he ended up so far behind the car. It made a lot more sense now. I can't help but laugh when I think of the sound I heard, thinking it was just his shoes hitting the pavement, but in fact was him doing the barrel roll.

I turn the wheel, which is lacking power steering, and pull into the gas station to fill up. I am still laughing hysterically as I catch my breath. We end up going to the bar in the Hotel. They are always busy on Wednesday nights with kareokee. I was getting tired but I was still having a pretty good time. I was on the dance floor and I can tell Hudson was a hurting unit. We were drinking redbull vodka's at the other bar and the withdrawal of redbull and the drive back wore Hudson out. I think his shoulder was slightly injured as well. We called it a night. I had a presentation in the morning that I had to prepare for, so I couldn't stay up all night.

Once my Thursday presentations were done we jumped in the Charger and headed back down to Denver. We were staying the night there and catching a flight home in the morning. I have a few friends that live in Denver so I sent them a message. A friend from the Air Force that I haven't seen in years. He is one of the most genuine guys you'll ever meet. My other friend is a girl I knew when I lived in Ireland, I'll call her Ashley. I haven't seen her in over 2 years.

We get to the hotel and Ashley comes over at 7:30. I get my stuff together and we meet Hudson down in the lobby. We go to a restaurant in downtown Denver. We met my AF friend there. After we ate we just went from bar to bar. This place is awesome!

I love Douglas because of the view, the environment, the small town feel of the place. The thing I don't like is how absolutely everyone smokes. There are decent looking girls, not great, but they all seem to have bad teeth. I think it just became socially acceptable to chain smoke until your teeth rot out, it is gross. You'd have to find those diamond in the rough girls who are not from that area and have higher standards for themselves.

Denver on the other hand...You could not smoke in the bars and restaurants. Everyone is much more health conscious there. I hear it is the singles capital of the country. When I heard that, I thought to myself...If a place is the singles capital of the country, and all of these single people meet each other and start dating, does that change the status and make somewhere else the new singles capital? I'm sure if I lived there I'd probably stay single so maybe not. The girls are attractive, the bars are conducive to meeting people, and everyone is very social. We went to all types of bars. From a place that was just a hole in the wall, to a bar that had girls in their underwear strutting around with body paint on them. This place was dark with black lights and small rooms. This dark bar probably invited a crowd of people doing mind altering drugs rather than the average college kid looking to get drunk with his/her friends. I liked it but it was different. We went to fancier places that had girls dressed up with stilletos and to roof top bars. They definitely had all the places that I would thrive in. We all had a good time. Hudson was hitting on girls and did well. I think if just he and I went out to places like this he could dominate. We were changing venues too much, but I can see his wheels turning when a group of girls are around and I like that...it's a good sign.

The end of the night I wanted Ashley to stay over. She look very good, as she did when I knew her in Ireland. Long strait beautiful red hair, a color girls spend hundreds of dollars trying to emulate. She is taller 5'9" with an amazing body, coming from her Norwegian side. She has dark green eyes, with very full lips. She brought Hudson and I back to the hotel. As I was leaving, I gave her a hug, and then I just leaned in and kissed her. She was a little thrown off since I wasn't really flirting with her too much throughout the night. I wanted to hang out with everyone, so I didn't really get too flirtatious with her. I knew she had to work early in the morning so I wasn't sure if that would deter her from coming in.

After I kissed her she sat there for about 4 seconds looking at me, then leaned in and started kissing me. This wasn't a good night kiss I was giving her. This was a, I want to bring you upstairs and throw you down on the bed, type kiss. So I grabbed her by the back of her head, a grip full of hair and I pull her head back against the headrest. I am holding her hair forcefully but I start lightly kissing behind her ear and her neck. She takes my hand and puts it where she wants it...after a minute I just said..."why don't you come upstairs for a little bit" and she parked the car.

I fucked her hard, but I kissed her passionately. I have been waiting all night for this, and I think she was too. We fell asleep at 3:15. I woke up at 4:30 to get ready to catch my flight that was leaving at 6. She left to get ready for work. I slept on my flight home after another good trip out West. I'll be back in September!

Parties over the weekend

2009-08-02T08:55:00.000-07:00

This weekend I went to two parties. They were both filled with beautiful women, and all the drinks were free. Friday night was a party at my friend's house, who's house I consider nearly my own. I brought a few girls with me to add to the mix. They were attractive and social so I knew I wouldn't have to tend to them all night. They also like to drink a lot, and that makes them comfortable. Everyone drank a lot that night.

I was walking around talking to everyone. I only knew 40% of the people there, and I liked that. I invited my friend Hudson to the party, as I knew he would have a good time...We are heading out to Wyoming this upcoming week and I anticipate a good work trip. I met this one attractive blond girl who I thought was a stripper, but she said "trooper" as in state trooper. When I asked her to show me her favorite move, she put me against the wall and started patting me down. This might have been fun for some people, but it mainly just brought back some bad memories so I told her I hated her move and I left to get another drink.
There was another girl with long dark hair and big green eyes. She was visiting from New York. She wanted me to play her in beer pong and claimed she was the best. I don't really like playing drinking games, so I passed at her challenge. She of course challenged me saying I was scared of losing (shit test). I didn't respond....I never do. Later on I was sitting on the couch. This NY girl came over and asked if the blond girl I brought was my girlfriend. She was not my girlfriend, but I said yes...I had a feeling that is what she wanted to hear.

"Do you live here?" she asks.

"Yes" even though I don't.

"Where is your room?"

"Downstairs...I'm going down there in a minute..." Then I stood up and made another drink, and NY girl went into the kitchen with the crowd of people.

I walked to the doorway and went to go downstairs, and I looked over and caught eyes
with NY girl. My best friend lives downstairs, and in situations like this his room is my room. I went into the living room in the basement. 30 seconds later NY girl comes downstairs. I walk her through the rooms in the basement into "my" room.

This girl is a trouble maker, and she has a very seductive look to her. She is very tan and it brings out the gleam in her green eyes. She looks at me and says,

"Alright, we have to do this quick before anyone notices we are gone."

Fast and hard, I can do that....So she lays down on the bed and she starts sucking my dick. I start taking off her skirt and all of a sudden my best friend comes barging into his room. I don't let her stop sucking my dick and I just start talking to my friend:

"Hey what's up man?"

"Hey, who's that?" He asks...

"A's friend from NY"...and he shuts the door and he climbs on his bed and starts rubbing her back...

NY girl looks up and tells us that she has always wanted to have a threesome....

All of a sudden my friend's pseudo girlfriend comes down the stairs and starts banging on the door that enters into the basement living room. NY and I hid in the closet and my friend went and dealt with his gf. The moment was spoiled and we ended up just going back upstairs.

NY girl ended up getting completely shitfaced and I didn't try talking to her incoherent self for the rest of the night. I ended up just staying the night with the blond girl I brought. I like her the best anyways. I am just not a fan of commitment right now....

I had work early Saturday morning and didn't get out until nearly 6. I took a long nap, and then got invited to a party about 30 minutes away. This place was out of control. The guy throwing the party lived in a mansion with an inground pool and huge backyard. The whole party was catered serving steak tips, shrimp, burgers, salad, anything you want. They had a band playing under this big tent. They had a bar serving whatever you want! Drinks with liquor that cost over $200 a bottle, there for your choosing. The party cost this guy between 15-20 thousand dollars. I was impressed. The girls there were beautiful.
A girl I was talking to wanted to go skinny dipping with me. She took off her clothes, got on the diving board in front of the entire party and dove in. I put on a pair of shorts and went in. The party was fun...I really need to get a better camera...my phone isn't cutting it anymore.

I found an absolutely beautiful luxury condo in Southie. It has bay windows that look over the entire city, a gorgeous kitchen and has a huge roof deck. I feel like this will be a good move.

Jealousy, what a wonderful thing...

2009-07-29T08:14:00.000-07:00

Jealousy, what a wonderful emotion. If you have ever felt that little sting of jealousy then you know how powerful it can be. It is uncomfortable. It can make you feel almost inferior. It can make you want things that you may not otherwise have any interest in. Bingo....

First off, if you want to use jealousy to your advantage, you should be able to control you own feelings of jealousy. This is something that I pride myself in now, but I haven't always. As a young lad, I would feel myself get jealous over things not worth my time. As time went on, I realized that no one else should have any bearing on how I feel. As more success came my way, and I realized I always have options. I found that jealousy is a wasted personal emotion. A friend said to me just the other day, in reference to picking up girls:

"Yea XXX could really give you a run for your money, he is good with girls!"

That's great...maybe he could, but I don't really compete for a girl's attention. And I don't get bitter if a girl hits it off with someone else. I'm not "better" than anyone else at picking up girls, I just am good at finding what I want. It's all perspective.

Back to jealousy. Once you realize that being jealous will hurt you more than help you, you can start utilizing it to land better looking women. A good opener, a great story or some smooth dance moves don't hold a flame to someone who has the opportunity to make a girl jealous.

If you are talking to a girl, and you are going to the bar to get a drink for yourself....start a conversation with the girl who is also waiting for her drink. If the girl you are talking to is going to use the restroom, turn and talk to the three girls that are just hanging out until your friend comes back. The best thing about talking to random people like this is the skewed perception other girls will have. You might be talking to this random girl next to you at the bar, about any ridiculous subject...but the girl you are "with" will automatically assume that this random girl is interested in you...and taking your attention from her!

Think about back in the day, when your life was boring and you had a girlfriend. Remember how she just assumed that every girl you talked to liked you? This is true across the board. Any girl who is slightly interested will assume that any other girl that is talking to you, wants you. The results, they try harder to keep your attention.

This is a short story of when I came to the realization that an aloof attitude and utilizing jealousy can give you the upper hand. I was living in D.C. at the time. I just got done reading Mystery Method. I met the most spoiled rich girl from Las Vegas. One night she asked if I wanted to go out with her. We made plans, she was coming over my apartment for a bottle of wine and then we were going to hit the town.

She came over and I was blown away. She looked absolutely stunning with the shortest little skirt, fancy high heels of some sort, hair all done up. I didn't realize how sexy she could look. I planned on going out to Rag Time or Liberty Tavern, no where fancy. I will admit, not ever to her, but to you, that I was slightly intimidated. (This was a few years ago)

So we hit the town. We went to some really nice places. As we were walking down the street, cars were stopping and yelling out their windows. Guys on the street were commenting. I have never seen guys just blatantly yell at a girl walking down the street like this.

We walk up to this fancy place with a line out the door. She walks right up to the doorman and says, "I want to talk to Todd"

So "Todd" comes out, sees Brook and gives her a big hug. He introduces himself to me and clears people out of the way so we can get through. He brings us over to this booth with a velvet rope, a bottle of vodka and a bunch of mixers.

"Here you guys go! On the house, have a good time!"

I was impressed, but acted cool about it. We made a few drinks and then made our way around the bar. We were standing outside of the dance floor, almost done with our drinks and three clean cut guys come over and started a conversation with us. They were taller, slightly older and wearing suits. You could make the assumption that they probably made more money than myself, since I was still in college and just bar tending on the weekends. Although they were talking to the both of us, it is obvious that they were there to talk to Brook.

I remember thinking to myself that if I had to sit there and talk to these three guys, and any other random guy that wanted to hit on her, tonight would be fucking boring as hell. Do I ask all three of them to leave...that Brook and I were out together and we didn't need the company? Do I sit here and compete for her attention, hoping she liked me the best? I don't really like either of these choices. I am a man of options.

They offer to buy us a round of drinks. I respectfully decline their offer and tell them I am going to make myself another drink over in our little booth. I leave this circle, and I can see that Brook is eating up this attention. I shake it off and make myself a redbull and vodka. Tonight is going to be fucking awesome, I can do whatever I want.

So I see these three attractive girls and I just walk up to them. We start talking. Everyone in D.C. has some story they want to tell, about what they do, where they are from. No one is actually FROM D.C. Minutes later, who is standing by my side, with a little angry pout on her face....Brook.

"Who are these girls?" with an attitude...

"Ohh Hey Brook, this is Sarah, Melanie and Shannon..."

She was mad that I left her for these other girls. I didn't explain that I left because I was bored with the conversation with those other three guys. I just said I bumped into them after I made a drink and we started talking.

We eventually left and went to a club type place. Same thing happened. We skip the line, she talks to the bouncer and we get brought up to the third floor for VIP. A bottle of alcohol and a little booth for free. She explained to me how her father is a rich guy in Las Vegas, and she just talked to the club owners and they treat her well. That works for me...

Sure enough though, guys are all over her. Guys wearing sunglasses, collard shirts and tans in the middle of November. This is not my style, not something I envy. I was relaxing for a while, enjoying myself. These guys want to pull her out to the dance floor. Very well...I meet this beautiful girl, tall, long dark hair, body that was most likely fake in an adjacent VIP booth. We hit the dance floor. I would see Brook looking at me from across the room angry to see me with another woman. I smile and wink at her. She knows I'm not going to follow her around. She may find these guys more attractive than myself, but she is more concerned about if I find these other girls more attractive than her. The fact that it seems like I could care less if she talks to other guys bothers her. She wonders why am I not jealous...and she is in turn jealous that I am now seemingly more interested in this tall girl rather than her.

I make my way over to the bar. I lost track of Brook at this point, until she abruptly came up to me.

"Okay, we need to get out of here!"

We leave and jump on the train back to Courthouse where we were living.(she had a place there too) She was kind of quiet, a little angry, but was slightly in thought. I'm the furthest thing from angry, and could care less if she is pissed about the night. Finally she starts asking me why I was dancing with all of these other girls. She was upset I didn't pay enough attention to her. In cases like this, don't apologize. I just tell her how we were out in a busy club, having a good time and that I didn't see anything wrong with that.

We get back to her apartment and she wants to talk about it.

"I am used to having guys chase me around when I go out with them...you were the only guy I have ever gone out with that didn't."

"yea...?"

"Well...it was kind of fucking hot. Even though I am mad, it turns me on!"

And so it goes....and to be completely honest, if I didn't just get done reading through the Mystery Method then I may have chased her, I may have felt insecure and jealous. My night could have sucked if I didn't make the decision that I was going to have a fun night regardless of what Brook had in mind. We always have options. It may not be with the girl we want, or with any girl at all...but that doesn't mean we can't still enjoy ourselves. Once we do that, it seems like the rest just falls in place...

The aftermath. Brook ended up being pretty cool once she realized I don't give a shit about her status, her money, or which rich, roided up tan guy is chasing her around.
This was one of the first instances where I really saw the power of using jealousy as a tool. Some of the most attractive women I have ever been with were attracted because I made them jealous.

Setting up a Threesome

2009-07-26T15:14:00.000-07:00

How do you go about getting into a threesome with two girls? To some this type of thing may just be a far off fantasy. Between the corny acting of porn stars and the flawless beautiful women created by the magic of movies, this may seem even less of a reality. I would say that there are three different ways that such threesomes can come about.

1. If you pay for it. The laws are being changed at some point, but prostitution is/was legal in Providence RI. If you were that desperate to have a threesome you could go on criagslist and arrange it. I don't suggest it and personally wouldn't risk it. I just remember the strippers I've dated from RI always hated those prostitutes. I always thought that was funny.

2. If you are in the right place at the right time. There can be a slight strategy to this. An example would be college parties. Girls are young and adventurous with less reservations. Girls also don't know their drinking limits at this age and often drink too much. Threesomes happen all of the time...in colleges all over America....with guys who were in the proximity to take advantage of the situation at that time. There is not much skill involved in getting this to happen. Slight persuasion might take place, but it comes down to luck. Two horny girls, and the right logistics (a nearby empty room) and it can happen to nearly anyone. My advice would be to put yourself in these environments and don't get too drunk. A sober eye can see things clearer. Luck is a predecessor of good planning.

3. Making it happen. This uses less luck and more skill. It means finding girls that are into it and putting it together. Another benefit is that these threesomes can be the porno style, no holds bar type of fucking. The college party drunk threesomes are sloppy and uncoordinated. I'm not sure how many threesomes I've had in my entire life but I have gotten better at putting them together. I will break down the last one I had because there are different things to think about.

Scenario 3 can happen a couple of ways. One way is involving your legitimate girlfriend. Some people have had the experience of having one single girlfriend and she wants to have another girl in the mix. Or the guy wants another girl and the gf goes along with it to make him happy. I have seen a lot of aftermath jealousy from this, and the sex is usually a balancing act of not getting your gf upset. This isn't always the case, but it is common.

Being a fan of casual dating, I'd rather have no obligation to balance anything. The second way is to set it up with girls you are just seeing. Casual dating is one of the key components to having such a NSA threesome experience. Your relationship is mainly based on sex, based on her pleasing you. Since this is the case, take advantage and find out how far she is willing to go. Another important thing to keep in mind is that you NEVER know if you don't ask. You might be surprised what the girl is that sun dress, looking through the produce section of the grocery store might be up for. I have been surprised in the past, but now I assume all girls like it in the ass until proven otherwise. I will push a girl to her furthest limits, and then some. I think this is why they hang around for so long.

Thursday night I get a text from a girl, Alexis, who I have had a threesome with before. I was at a bar and had been drinking a few beers up until this point. I told her I was thinking I wanted to have another threesome, and asked if she knew any girls. She didn't, so I looked through my trusty mobile telephone. Looking through the list of girls' names I don't even remember, acronyms and names of bars identifying which Tiffany and Michelle I was looking at, I try to find these two girls who I think might be down. I text both of them, just asking what they were doing. One girl I knew was a bisexual, and she replied first. Unfortunately she was not available. The second girl responded shortly after saying she just got out of work. I didn't actually know if this girl was into girls, but I had a feeling...so I just put it out there.

"So I want to ask you something, but it is a pretty strait forward question."

"Alright go ahead!"

"So what do you think about hooking up with girls?"

"Haha well....yea I am actually into that, how did you know?"

"I just had a feeling, do you want to come over tonight and have some drinks with my friend and I?"

"Yea, that sounds fun..."

So from here I arranged to have the girls come over around 10:30 or so. I drove home, straitened out my apartment a bit and right at 10:30 the second girl called and said she was outside. Alexis was going to get there around 11.

So the girl comes in and I pour her a glass of red wine. I find red wine is more relaxing. We sit on my couch and she asks me a few questions about Alexis. I pull her up on facebook and show her some pictures. Shortly after Alexis pulls up and texts me she is out front. I walk around and let her in.

When you are having 2 girls over that have never met before, the first 20 minutes can be slightly awkward, but also exciting. We all know what we are waiting for, but we are just waiting for the buzz of the wine to set in. I have music playing and the lights showcasing the serene Mel Allen picture hanging above the illuminated wine bottles. It is important that everyone is as comfortable as possible. I give Alexis a large glass of Shiraz and we sit on the couch. The soft lighting makes everything look more attractive. I'm sitting in between them, starting the conversation and bringing up any similarities that we all have. This isn't as obvious as the ice breakers you do on your first day of orientation at your new job. Just telling a story they both can relate to can subtly stimulate conversations. Rub each girl's leg or throw you knee over one of the girl's thigh. You want them to see you flirting with the other. It is important to then remove yourself from the couch to let them talk and feel each other out. Get yourself another glass of wine, go use the restroom or get up and look through your CD's. You don't want to be the barrier between them, your goal is for the three of you to reach a sexual synergy.

After 20 or 30 minutes, equivalent to 2 large glasses of wine, stand up and bring them into your bedroom. Once the first girl lays down, start kissing her, then turn to the other girl and start kissing her, pulling her onto the bed. Once they both are on the bed, get up and shut the door, light candles, whatever. They should start kissing at this point.

This is how you go about setting up a threesome. Tell them what you want them to do! When girls are turned on they are willing to do more than they would normally admit to. This is proven, so take advantage. All of the threesomes that I have actually set up ended up being crazier than what you see in these porno's. The girls know me and know what I like, and so they are both working together to turn me on. No one gets jealous and everyone has fun. Waking up and having morning sex with two girls is also a good way to start the day. You never know if you don't ask!

Approach a table of 5

2009-07-24T07:24:00.000-07:00

After work I stopped over at a bar across the street. I have only been to this place a few times, but it always had a lot of people there...and I was in the mood to see people. So my friend Hudson and I sent out an email to our co-workers to see if anyone wanted to join. One other joined us and we met at the bar.

As I walk in I notice it was a little emptier than the previous two times, but there is one table of girls. I sit at the table next to them and order a Budweiser. We were only going for one drink, but it somehow turned into 4 or 5. As the place filled with more people, I had more reason to stay for just one more. On our second round, a group of girls came in, fairly attractive. I knew I would be talking to them at some point, it was just a matter of time.

They sat down at a table behind us and were eating food. Hudson asked, "How would you go about approaching that table of 5 girls?"

This is one of the harder approaches. Everyone is sitting at tables at this bar. They are sitting at a table behind us. Walking over and starting a conversation while you are standing and they are sitting is unnatural and puts you at a disadvantage. They have a better position of power by sitting and could potentially write you off...and then you would have to shamefully walk back to your table, as the entire bar just watched you crash and burn.

How would you open that table? Ask them how their food was? What they are drinking? These boring questions would have you looking like a fool in no time! You would need something with more energy, something louder and something more fun.

I get up to use the restroom. This is how I am going to initiate this approach. I bring my beer with me because it just feels more comfortable to have a drink in my hand when I am approaching a table of girls. I walk past the table and don't make eye contact with any of them. I ignore them completely. Then on the way back to my table I decide to stop in and ask these girls a question.

"So where is the dance floor in this place?" I ask them loudly. I notice they are all smiling which is a good sign. This little Irish Pub does not have anything close to a dance floor. They start pointing at this tiny round table next to them, hitting the top of it...

"This is the dance floor, take your shirt off and dance!"

"That table is way too small for the dance moves I do...I need a ton of room. We would have to move you girls against the wall."

The conversation went on for a little longer. One of the girls was trying to be a wise ass, as usual. So I point her out to the entire bar...and announce to everyone...

"That girl is mean right there....that one. No one talk to those girls over there, they are unenjoyable and are not very good at conversation." They were laughing and were asking me to come back. I told them no and turned my back and returned to my table. Moments later the waiter brought over a drink with three straws.

"The table of girls over there wanted me to bring you this drink."

It was very thoughtful of them. A large glass of water for the three of us, with lemons and limes as well. I will have to use that one when I am out! So in return I had the waiter bring them a large glass of milk with 5 straws. Unfortunately some of them were lactose intolerant.

Later I picked some country songs on the juke box, and tried to get them to give me money, but they didn't. As I was sitting at the table, I got a text from a girl out in RI asking what I was doing that night. It got me thinking....you know, I would really like to have a threesome, and I know this girl from RI would be alright with that. So I told her via text..."I'd really like to get another girl in the mix tonight" She agreed that it would be fun.

I text these other two other girls I know that are bi and tried to get some things planned out...

I was finishing up my last beer, and I had plans for the night. We were cashing out and getting ready to leave. I felt like it would only be right to get one of the girl's numbers that I had been flirting with throughout the evening. There was an open chair next to the girl that I'd say I liked the most, so I sat down. Always assume attraction.

I address the entire table after I sit down - "Excuse me, I am going to talk to your friend, so could everyone please not listen!"

"What? Why, what are you talking about?"

"Nothing, please don't listen..." and then I turn my attention to the girl.

"So I really enjoyed that water, it was great. I want to take you out and return the favor, get some waters, nice lemons and just see where the night takes us..."

Then I become a little more serious and I get her number. I don't feel like it was a strong number close though. We didn't really talk enough, we didn't interact enough. If I didn't live an hour away maybe I would have stuck around and built up some more comfort, but oh well....I had other things to do that night...

The night went on, I drove home in excitement because there were two girls waiting for me. Monday's post will be, how to organize and orchestrate a proper threesome...

Change

2009-07-22T12:43:00.000-07:00

I feel like I haven't posted in a long time...So this is a quick note on change, and subsequently a brief update.

I am a big advocate of: if things are working, try something else. This applies in so many ways. If your approaches aren't working, try something different, even if it is something drastic. If your stories aren't getting a good response, then tell different ones.

Last night I had a girl over. She came by at 9:00 and brought one of my favorite bottles of wine over. Always advised. Well I don't watch much television, but while I was relaxing on the couch waiting for this young lady's arrival, I did flip through the channels a little. I put on Hell's Kitchen. I have never seen the show, but I was amazed at how some of the people that were on a national cooking competition lacked some of the basic cooking knowledge! Not seasoning anything, not searing things before throwing it in the oven, sending out raw chicken into the dining room. I was interested enough to want to watch the rest of the episode.

This girl shows up at 9. She comes in, I have the lighting set the way I always do. Dimly light, illuminating the wine rack on the bar, which helps set the mood. Wine in hand, the standard setting is there. The only difference is that we are watching TV now instead of paying attention to each other. Our conversations die out quick when the show comes back on. I'm content with this for now since I want to watch the rest of this episode.

The show ends, but naturally I just leave the TV on and we start talking. I notice that her legs are crossed away from me and she is leaning more towards the arm rest than towards me. Even though we are talking, the TV is still distracting. I noticed I was having a harder time than usual reeling her into my stories. Her hand is in mine and we are flirting, but I just don't feel like things are moving quick enough, or are intense enough. We didn't really seem to be building any sexual tension. I was thinking to myself, how can I make her more involved, and is there a smooth way to do this? We are comfortable here on the couch, semi watching TV, but it's not what I want. I need to change something. Can I just shut off the TV? Would that seem strange if I just flat out shut it off?

Things weren't going the way I wanted, so I had to change something. I just stood up, without asking her, and I turned on some music and shut the TV off. As soon as I sat down again, her legs instantly crossed back over to me, she shifted her weight over to me and rested her hand on my leg. I just changed the environment a little bit and it was enough to kick start things in the right direction.

I do the same thing at a bar. If I'm on a date at a bar and things aren't exciting enough, if I feel like we aren't moving towards the direction I want, I will cash out and go to a new bar. I have seen drastic changes in a date's atmosphere just by simply changing something that didn't seem to be working.

Moving onto some of my personal updates....

For the last 5 years I have lived in this smaller city, between Boston and Providence. It has treated me well. I have made friends with many of the local bar and restaurant owners, bouncers, cocktail waitresses, bartenders and that has all worked in my favor. I have worked in restaurants in the area for the last 5 years. You may have heard me preach before that the restaurant was like my own little PUA training ground. I was constantly surrounded by women, and the experience made me a more social and confident man.

I like my little apartment near the beach. I live by myself, which is the way I like it. I do things when I want to and have no obligation to anyone else. This apartment, this area, it has all treated me well over the years, but I am a man of change and I think that time is nearing.

I am putting in my two week notice at the restaurant this weekend. After some careful evaluation, I think my time would be better spent doing other things. There may be a rotating door of college girls coming in and out, but it's worth the sacrifice. You can find woman anywhere.

I am also planning on moving out of this city and move much closer to Boston. This will cut the commute to work, and I will have Boston as my backyard. This will be good for my game, good for this blog, good overall.

Dealing with Shit Tests

2009-07-10T07:35:00.000-07:00

A week ago, I was working in the restaurant. One of the cooks came into the back room where we get our drinks. This cook is 26, clean cut, and an attractive guy. He always asks me questions about getting girls. His problem is that he is too nice, too willing to please.

He comes into the back and we are talking. One of the more attractive waitresses walks in and sees that he is eating starbursts...

"Oooo can I have some?" she says to him...

"Sure, here I'll give you three, and I'll just take two...I'll give you the extra one" and he smiles.

She takes them and leaves. He looks over at me, and sees the disappointed look on my face, as I shake my head at him.

"What?" he asks.

I have to be basic with him, like teaching a first grader math.

"You had 5 starbursts in your hand. She wanted some, and you gave her 3, leaving you with 2."

3>2 This is not just math, there is a principle here that he is missing. Three is greater than two, which equals out in her mind that she is greater. This is subconscious. But he is lacking a strong character, and it will show in other interactions with women.

A shit test is a term that referrs to little tests that women will do, to see how much control they have. They will try to have you jump through their proverbial hoops. "can you tie my shoe?" would be an example of a completely insulting shit test. Smaller shit tests might take place in conversation:

you: "So what's your name?" (which I never ask, but for the sake of demonstration)
her: "Guess..."

This is a shit test. An AFC would probably start asking for clues and guessing her name....I don't have time for guessing games, I'm a man with an agenda.

you: "Guess? I don't think so, but you look like you probably have some sort of a stripper name. I'm going to call you.....Lexi. I like that name." and call her Lexi for the rest of the night....even in the bedroom ;)

Once you understand the concept of shit tests, you will start seeing them in all types of interactions with women. They are good. They are a sign of interest, but they ARE a test. They are seeing if you are weak and manipulable. If you comply, you are losing your value and dignity. I will run through a few scenarios that I deal with, and the different types of women you meet.

Some women you go out with will sit there and just stare at you with a big smile on their face. They will approve and agree with everything you say. They will keep complimenting you. If you are getting this a lot, raise your standards. These women will not shit test you and you can do better than them.

You might be out at a bar and you talk to an attractive girl. She seems fun at first, laughing and smiling. As the conversation goes on, she is asking you to do things for her. She will start asking absurd questions, seeing what she can get away with. This is the extreme opposite of the first girl. She is used to having guys approach her and enjoys making them jump through hoops for her own entertainment. You may get the impression that complying with some of these games will make the conversation run smoother. Your intuition would be incorrect. If you do comply, you lose all credibility. You should be controlling the conversation, and steering it towards something more interesting. If she keeps it up, it is more attractive to not put up with her shit and walk away. Your chance of getting with her are better if you leave rather than stay in some bull shit conversation about nothing. Girls that play too many games get annoying quick.

Think about this. Would Robert Deniro put up with these questions? He may not be the poster celebrity for a PUA but he has a strong character...which relates to this post.

Video

I like this short clip. It depicts the right mind frame.

It will be common to encounter more subtle shit tests than in my last example. You want to portray confidence, displaying your character. This is what the "testing" is all about. My most common response to shit tests are simply ignoring them completely, as if I didn't hear it. Just repeating themselves will subconsciously knock their test down a notch. If they ask me again, I completely ignore it again and will ask them sometime off that subject. They get the hint.

*Side note: In the video, Deniro was pissed off. We are out at bars, talking to women, doing what we love. We should be cocky/funny and having a good time, not angry. The video just demonstrates what a strong frame looks like. No girl should ever actually piss you off because of her actions. We should be deciding which emotional state we want to be in.*

Dealing with these test is essential to getting better looking women. Once you start getting into that strong confident mind frame you will naturally handle these shit tests. Your actions, conversations and caliber of women will all start to become congruent with a confident lifestyle.

A Guide to a Casual Relationship

2009-07-07T13:18:00.000-07:00

When you first read a book about pick-up, it almost reads like a magic trick. As you read it, it plays out in your mind and things go smoothly. There are no objections or resistance to your opener. It's not until you experience a conversation going flat, and having nothing to say, do you realize that this isn't a magic trick.

You will see the biggest results in the early stages. This will reinforce the idea that pick-up really can work. The reason why you are making so much progress right now is because this is the first time you are actively talking to women. You start accrediting any success with women to game. I think this is a good thing, because you will need the motivation to get you through the rough spots. The sticking points. I still remember my first official opener after reading the Mystery Method. It worked great and I was sold, this is magic. Soon after I realized it is a skill that gets better over time.

People try to get better with women for different reasons. Some want a girlfriend, other guys want to date a lot of women, some want to date better looking women. The list goes on. If you are not necessarily "looking" for a girlfriend, there is one thing to be weary of. Once you start to see a little success with women, you might have the urge to prematurely settle down with a woman, because this is the first time an attractive woman has shown interest in you. Ignorance is bliss, and if you are happy with that...then run with it.

If you have a goal to date more women, and actually get better at picking them up, then do yourself a favor and avoid this trap. I promise you there will be other women to fall in love with later. Once you start getting a lot of phone numbers and taking girls on dates, relationships will start moving towards the girlfriend/boyfriend path. This is what we are avoiding. Three reasons why this can happen, inexperience, complacency and listening to your emotions rather than your logic.

If inexperience is the case, don't be alarmed...just print this out and pin it up in your room as a reference guide. This will keep you on the strait road. But please be warned that this road is not for the weak.

This is a guide on how to maintain a casual relationship. The goal is not to trick or deceive women into thinking this is an exclusive relationship. That is counter productive and will take a lot more effort. In this process girls' hearts may be broken. This is not because we are jerks, but rather because we are brutally honest.

So we are in the business of "dating" a number of girls. With my day to day schedule, I am maxed out at dating 4-5 girls at a time. I am not always dating this many, but it is hard to maintain more. Girls will be coming and going at different speeds. This depends on the girl. Some girls will only be able to handle "dating" for a few weeks. Most girls will last at least 3 weeks before they either want something more or find someone else that will give them more attention. Some girls will last years casually dating. The max I have seen is 2 years before things run their course.

Here is the guidelines numbered below:

1. When to see her: After the second legitimate date (usually the third time you have seen her) you can not see her any more than increments of 3 weeks. This is important for 2 reasons. If you see her more, she will begin to grow attached to you. This is the death of a casual relationship. The second reason we set this time span is because you need that time to maintain the other relationships as well as finding new ones.

2. The phone: This is a crucial aspect of a casual relationships. She will want to call to talk about her day or about her problems. Don't do it. When you first start dating her, she will naturally call you, because most guys will listen. She will attempt to call you at night before she goes to bed. Don't answer the phone, even if your sitting on couch with nothing to do. Nightly conversations are deceiving, making her think you are there as her comfort and support person. Secondly, you will be busy on most other nights and won't have time to talk.

Texting is the best means of communication. You can call if you are making plans, but the conversation shouldn't last more than 2 minutes. Since you won't be seeing these girls for 3 weeks at a time, you should send an occasional text throughout the weeks saying hi. You can ask about their week or how they did on that test they were telling you about the week before. If they don't hear from you at all the relationship will dissolve, so keep that in mind.

3. The dates: Don't do dinner. Meet up semi-late. Don't go out on Fridays or Saturdays. Dinners are too long, too expensive and send the wrong message. Only people in serious relationships, and suckers on first dates go out to dinner. Drinks only. Gauge the time on your own schedule. I like to at least be asleep by midnight, so I will meet up at 9:30ish, have 2 drinks at the bar, then go back to my apartment or hers. With proper planning I will have a slight enjoyable buzz by 10:30 or 11, some rough sex that ends around 11:55, and I'm asleep by 12:00. Planning dates like this will give you the ability to still be productive at work, have time to do things after work, and go on multiple dates a week.

The girls should be buying their own drinks when you are out. I often don't even go to the bar, and just have girls bring over a bottle of wine. win/win.

4. Conversation: The conversations should generally stay simple. "how is work/school going?" Once they come to terms with the fact that you are just causally dating, they will want to bring up the subject of other guys they are dating. This shouldn't make you jealous at all, but that doesn't mean she can talk about it. She can talk about guys with her girlfriends, not you. At some point she will want to talk about "where we are in our relationship, and if it is going anywhere" The key word to use is dating. Don't lie to her or lead her to believe that you are moving towards an exclusive relationship. You must be honest and tell her that you like dating her, but don't have time to see anyone exclusively. Girls will accept this response, they just want to know. This will lead me to my next bullet.

5. Retraction of this statement: "I don't want to just date you anymore, I want us to be exclusive!" Game over. She just ruined it for herself. As mentioned above, a girl may inquire what your intentions are with her, and that is alright. The second she crosses that mental line and asks you to be exclusive, it is your obligation to abort that relationship. She will never ever cross back over to the casual side. In an attempt to get you back, she will tell you,"okay, we can just casually date..." No you can't. She may not even realize it but at this point she can no longer handle this NSA relationship. It can get messy. Take my advice and end it. When she cries, you may feel bad, but it is for the best. Over time, the crying effects you less, I promise.

6. New girls: Fridays and Saturdays are when you will regenerate the girls you lose as the weeks go on. You are also on a mission to constantly upgrade. Some girls leave because they can't handle not having you to themselves. Other girls you will get tired of and stop calling, and they need to be replaced. Never schedule dates on Fridays and Saturdays. Thursdays can go either way, especially in college where Thursdays are a great night to go out. If you don't keep these nights for yourself, you will find that your well will run dry.

Your quality of women should be going on a general incline as well. You will learn more about what you like and don't like. *Side note-You will land girls hotter than you ever thought you could get. Don't let this throw you. You are just reaching a higher potential than you're used to. Treating her any different is like putting your car in reverse and trying to drive forward.*

7. Changing plans: This is important. A girl might have to cancel because of reasons x,y,z. If they give me reasonable notice, I might allow it, but generally my week is booked up by Sunday night. If a girl wants to do Thursday instead of Tuesday, I can't do it. "well how about Wednesday?" she will ask. Nope sorry. Letting them change plans will decrease how important they view your time. I have reduced girls flaking to a minimum, but when it happens, they are done. No questions asked. That shouldn't even need to be mentioned...

8. Finally: If you want to keep her coming back for more, fuck her hard. Leave her shaking in the bed while you roll over and go to sleep. Pull her hair, slap her ass, do what you want, they will like it. They might want to make love with their boyfriends that they aren't telling you about, but they will come to you for the good stuff.

The upside to this style of dating is that you will be doing all of the things that build attraction. You are busy, you are not needy, you are aloof in your actions and not jealous and you will have a new aire of confidence. These things happen naturally when you have many options.

As I said before, this isn't always easy, and not everyone has the stomach for it. You have to be strong in your decisions when you make them, and honest in the statements you make. If you feel that tingle of emotion when you are with her and you want to see her more often, you better logically analyze what you are doing.

So I stick to these rules.... until the day I meet the girl that turns my world upside down. I get more skeptical of her existence as time goes on, but I still have faith.

Sexual Vibes

2009-07-06T13:16:00.000-07:00

I love the drive into work. It is an hour for me to just relax. I am in no rush to get there, as opposed to my ride home. The ride into work is always better when I have some great morning sex.

There is a new girl at the restaurant, Ally. I worked on 4th of July and was talking to her. She is very quiet and seemingly shy. Although she is shy, she has a sexual vibe.

Sexual vibe is an interesting thing. Not everyone has receptors to feel this type of energy. I have a very keen sense of the energy. I am still analyzing the objective differences between women who have this vibe and other attractive women that do not. It is more than just good sex. There are some distinct, and defining difference between the two and it will take some more research.

People at work probably didn't look twice at Ally, assuming she was just really quiet. Sure enough, I knew better. I knew there was a wild side under this innocent persona. I talked to her and discretely exchanged numbers. Things are always more fun when they are a secret. I also know girls don't keep secrets very well, but that is more their problem than mine.

Sunday I just cleaned my apartment. I bought a large bottle of wine and initially had plans to hang out with this personal trainer that I had met. She had a client the next morning at 6 am, and said she would still come over, but she didn't want to stay up late. We decided that Monday night might be better.

Now I am laying around in my clean apartment and I already have the wine in the fridge. Mentally, I was already prepared to have a woman over. I remember that I got Ally's number the day before. One second goes by where I decide if I really want to cross that line. After that one second passed, I sent a text message asking how her 4th was.

After a few more messages she was coming over at 11. I felt like I was going to see a new side of Ally that no one would expect...no one at work anyways.

She showed up and I let her in the apartment. She looked much better outside of her work clothes. I show her around and get her a glass of wine. We sit on the couch and relax. The lights are set dim and I have Boyce Avenue on my computer, playing through my stereo. She complements the apartment and we start talking. She was an English Literature major. I find that interesting. She also likes to act, and was in quite a few plays. This is not the stereotypical girl I pursue, but acting is kind of intriguing. I feel as though I have indirectly gotten better at acting in correlation to game. I'd be willing to elaborate on that some other time.

On our third glass of wine, our conversations were flowing a lot more easily. I was doing most of the talking the first glass. This is common and I am comfortable with that. As time went by, our knees touch, my hand rests on her leg and she ran her fingers through the hair on the back of my head. We start kissing and the tension and energy exploded.

All of the explicit details of what happened might be too much, but my intuition was right. This girl was above and beyond what I had expected. Confident in her actions, she knew how to make everything look sexy. I fucked her so hard she was screaming and punching the walls, until she squirted all over the place, three separate times. Fuck. It was amazing.

There is an Asian girl at my other job. Although I don't typically find Asians attractive, I have noticed the same vibe from her. Only some see it, a sixth sense maybe. For the sake of science, I should probably investigate...

First Night In New York

2009-07-04T11:58:00.000-07:00

I leave work right as the clock hits 5:30. My bus is leaving for New York at 6:30. A friend drives me there and I arrive at the bus station at 6:25. Unfortunately there is a lot of traffic and the buses are two hours behind schedule. I was supposed to arrive at 11:00 pm, but now I am not going to get there until 1:00 am. I am staying with a girl I knew in the Air Force. I haven't seen her in years. I am happy to see her, but I am more excited about going out in New York for a few days.

The bus arrives around 1 am on 27th and 7th. I had been texting this girl with my status, and I was getting the impression that she was pretty intoxicated. Her response time was becoming longer, there were random letters in words and I knew she was at a bar. Despite how drunk she was she managed to get in a cab and come pick me up. We went directly to a bar. I would of like to have gone home and showered but I didn't want to waste any valuable bar time.

My AF friend was with another girl in this cab. She was attractive and had nice facial features. Her lips were very thick, her eyes were piercing blue, she had a beautiful smile and long blond hair. I called her Alicia the whole night, but that is not her name. They were both attractive girls and I know they get a lot of attention at the bars.

They bring me to this small Irish Pub. My AF friend went to bring my bag behind the bar and Alisha orders me two shots of Jameson and then a beer. On the cab over to the bar, Alicia commented on my name, making the same comment that every other girl makes. In response I told her that I had to break up with her. I don't think I could endure a relationship that was this predictable. She tried to mend our relationship with gifts.

"I have never ever bought a guy a drink, and I just bought you three...you have to like me now!"

"Not quite, but you are making a little bit of ground..." As I half smile and put my arm around her.

It was too easy. I have noticed that these little games of breaking up with girls, and making them win you back work better on attractive girls rather than girls that are just cute. At this point my AF friend is completely trashed and sitting in the corner drinking a vodka tonic. I have been roaming around the bar, checking things out. I see Alicia in the other corner talking to a mixed crowed of people.

Earlier in the night I noticed this one group of people against the window of the bar, looking out to the sidewalk. There was an attractive girl within this group and she was sitting next to a younger guy. In my earlier days I would have probably assumed that it was her boyfriend. Now know that this is rarely the case. Couples hardly ever go out to bars like this. At one point I notice the kid sitting by himself in that same spot, so I walk over...

"Hey what's going on...so are there any other decent bars in this area?"

"Yea there are actually. Where are you from?"

"I'm from Boston area, but I'm just here for a few days."

We talked for a minute and he was a nice guy. Then the rest of his group came back and I met everyone. I met the girl that I found attractive. It was his cousin. Alicia walks by and I introduce her to Tim, Kate and everyone else in the group. At this point we are all talking. Tim says to Alicia,

"So how long have you known Tyler?"

"About an hour...how long have you know him?"

"About 10 minutes."

Everyone started laughing. It was a clear example of how people make assumptions when they see people talking. You could potentially walk around the bar talking to people, and everyone would think that you know everyone. This is one of my favorite strategies in a bar. I talk to guys, girls, groups of people and network from there. Aside from making "friends" all over the bar, you are also playing another card in the dynamics of women. Jealousy. In my opinion, jealousy is the most powerful tool in pick up. That little sting of jealousy will bring that girl back to your side quicker than the smoothest pick up line.

My AF friend was ready to go home, and it was about 2 am. The bars were open for another 2 hours. I got Kate and Alicia's numbers and hailed a cab. I brought my friend upstairs, tucked her into bed, grabbed her keys and left again. As I was leaving I texted myself her address.

I get back to the bar and I believe Alicia probably took a few more shots. She was drunk, and I don't really like that. I ended up talking to Kate and dancing with her most of the night.

"Where are you staying tonight?" she asks. This is a fairly good indication she wants me to go home with her.

"Well I am visiting my friend, but I don't have to necessarily stay at her house. Do you live around here?"

"Yea I live a few blocks up the road."

"Oh cool. Do you have any wine or anything at your house?"

"Hmm...Yea I think I do have some actually." This wave of excitement flows over me.

"Well I am getting kind of tired of this bar...do you want to go have some wine and relax?"

It was a great first night here in New York....

I woke up at 7 am. She wanted to get breakfast but I told her I have to get back to my friend. I take a cab to her address and use her keys that I took to get in. I go into her room and lay down next to her. I sleep a few more hours and we get up at about 9. I tell her that I stayed at a friend's house last night and she didn't ask too much more about it.

We end up getting breakfast at this place that had a line out the door! It is supposed to be one of the best little spots in NY, so we gave our name and came back an hour later. It was well worth the wait, but the prices were unbelievable. The bill came out to 40 dollars and we only got pancakes and an omelet. We ate everything and were pretty full. I wanted to go for a run when we got back.

Instead, she suggested riding bikes through the city. Her roommate had an extra bike and he let me use it. I threw on some shorts and a tee shirt and we took off into the city. It was absolutely gorgeous. We went down the Hudson River and through Central Park. Going through the park was nice, with no cars to worry about, only horses and rollerbladers. We stoppeed down by this little lake where people were rowing around. There was a building off in the distance that was in one of the Ghost Buster movies. I inserted the picture at the top of the post.

After that we rode through the city, squeezing between cabs and buses. We went and checked out the Apple Store. It was a lot of fun! New York is a lot different than Boston. There seemed to be bigger sunglasses, more little white dogs, beautiful girls on every street corner dressed to impress. Overall it just seemed busier, and things stayed open longer. If I lived here I would never sleep, and I don't think I would ever settle down. It was great seeing the city on bike. On our travels we found this little driving range where we hit golf balls into the Hudson River. We hung out there for and hour or two. We were talking about dinner, and I decided I would cook something...cooking and wine are two things I thoroughly enjoy.

After we hit the golf balls we headed back towards her house. We stopped in at Whole Foods and picked up some groceries for dinner. I was cooking something a little fancy and I wanted to try out a new recipe. I needed some shallots and I was looking around for a store employee. I look to my left and I am standing next to Mike Myers. Then I notice everyone is staring at him. I expected him to be dressed up like Austin Powers so I was a little let down. I was going to see if he knew where the shallots were, but then I saw them next to the garlic. We picked up two bottles of wine and headed home...

After dinner we went out. The night was very eventful and slightly out of control. I will have to explain later. It is 4th of July and I have to prepare for another night out! Happy 4th!!

New York and Some Evaluation

2009-07-01T18:01:00.000-07:00

Work can keep you busy and almost make you forget what else is going on around you. Balance is the goal, but sometimes some areas need more attention. I had customers fly into town for a week and between the presenting I had to do and the preparation that was needed, I was sucked into this little black hole. The hard work paid off though and everything went well. Now I can get back to the gym and start enjoying my nights again. Learning curves can be a thorn in your side, but they are necessary.

Today I bought a bus ticket to New York on a whim. I am leaving tomorrow. I'm only going for two nights, but I think it will be two nights filled with beautiful women. One thing I love about traveling, even short trips, is the freedom that you feel. The world is my playground, and I love taking advantage of that. Chasing that next adventure...

A friend of mine has shown interest in pick up and it motivated me. I feel as though I know what works for me, and I can get comfortable and slightly complacent with that. I typically like the shotgun style and can usually pull the girls I want. I have gotten good at inner-game and dominating on second dates. I have also gotten good at molding relationships the way I want them, which can take practice and a slightly cold heart. Following rules instead of your emotions can be a hard thing to grasp. I want to sharpen up some of the other aspects of game. I will revisit some of my old pick-up books and do some more experimentation. The Mystery Method is a text book that has most of the primary concepts essential for night game.

Watching videos on pick up get me thinking. If I could record some of my own approaches I could probably learn a lot about myself. Some weaknesses that I don't notice. These are just some ideas that I have had. There is always room for improvement. The key to improvement is experimentation, documentation and consistency. I think that will be the focus of this blog for the next few weeks.

I know I have been getting emails asking for advice on different things and I try to get back to everyone. If people have any suggestions on things they want me to try out and report on, feel free to send me a message. I'm open to ideas.

You'll be hearing about New York soon...

The Perspective of a Warrior

2009-06-21T10:00:00.000-07:00

I just read a post in a forum I read through every once in a while. This guy was asking what the meaning of life was....is this all there is to it? breaking it down to chemical reactions in your brain causing feeling from different stimulants. Are you kidding me? If this is how you view life, that is terrible...

This person lacks drive. Drive for improvement, the thirst for a challenge, the feeling of adrenalin, the feeling of success, the feeling of a failing attempt, but motivation to keep going.

My life is chalk full of things that I am proud of and things that are outside the realm of what others would attempt. This is what has built who I am. In my mind I am invincible, until proven otherwise. The women I meet love that about me, and they also hate it.

I have broken the sound barrier inside of an F-15 fighter jet. I have stepped inside a ring, mind racing with adrenalin, ready to fight another man in front of crowds of people screaming, wanting a war, and came out victorious every time. Benedict knows the feeling...I ran the Boston Marathon at the drop of a hat, by myself, for the fuck of it. I have spent time in jail with the lowest, and now travel the country training people on medical technology. No one knows the range of experiences I have been through. I have traveled around the world and lived in more places than I can count. I seek adventure. I don't sleep. I furiously go to the gym. I do this because deep down I know that some day I will have the fight of my life. I don't know what that means yet, but I know I better be ready. I am starting a Master's Program, and will soon join another elite statistical percentage of the world. I have never broken a bone, but have shattered some with my bare hands. I haven't had a common cold in years. I am physically strong because I am mentally strong. My experiences have made me confident in who I am, but I still drive to be better. Being content is a weakness. I will be bigger, stronger, smarter in the future because that is how I am built.

So while that author of the post sits on his couch and watches TV, thinking about the meaning of his life...I will be busy creating a fucking legend.

Welcome to heart break

2009-06-19T12:47:00.000-07:00

I'm bored at work so I am going to tell you a meaningless story...maybe it will pass some time.

I am currently seeing this girl and I'm sure she would like me to start dating her on a more serious level, but I can't fucking do it. I don't find her as attractive as I did a month ago. I don't find her stories as interesting as I did a month ago. And she can't fuck as good as I want her to. This is a story that she told me the other day after I explained how my brother and I often get confused as twins...

Her: "When I was younger my friend Liz and I looked a lot alike. Everyone thought we were twins. One day she thought that my mom was picking her up to bring her home, so when my mom pulled up she got in the car and then my mom left thinking it was me..."

Me: "What? your mom just drove away with this other girl and thought it was you?"

Her: "Yes"

Me: "Okay, did she get in the back or something and your mom just assumed it was you?"

Her: "No she got in the front, and my mom had a conversation with her but couldn't tell the difference."

Me: "Yea right..."

That was my response....I didn't believe her because I think she tells stories to try to one up my stories. How the fuck could a mom not recognize her own daughter when she was sitting in the front seat? One upping stories don't make for good conversation.

This relationship is an example of how, you see a girl at a bar and you think she is amazing. You think she is attractive, you talk to her and find that she is funny, sociable and seems smart. Maybe you were nervous to initially approach her. Don't be. Remember how these qualities fade....

And now....I have to break this girls heart.